These Sex Dolls Are Out Of Control!

So, what the fuck is going on, son? Like, is this what we’re really doing, man? Look, are folks trying to tell me that dudes are giving up on real women, fam? Listen, all I want to know is, when did sex dolls become the wave, bruh? I mean, variations of them have been around for eons. All in all, what’s going on in society and technology that this has become such a trend? All I can say is, we’re living in some strange ass times, people.

Ok, I was inspired to write this because of social media. Basically, over the last few weeks, I’ve been seeing more and more posts about a new brand of sex dolls for men. Listen, shit started getting real when a doll named Shakira started making rounds on the internet. Side note, I would normally put hyperlinks to articles on my site, but I ain’t tryna get caught out there dispensing porn, son. Then again, is it porn if it’s a doll? See, I don’t know what the fuck is happening out here, man! In any case, Shakira became notable because of how “she’s” shaped. Essentially, she has a big ass and big ass titties and dudes are losing their fucking minds over it.

Moving on, more and more pictures of dolls have been invading my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter timelines, fam. Wait, what kinda pervs am I following, bruh? Seriously, why is my IG Explore Page filled with this shit, folks? Hmm, I may need to reevaluate who I associate with. Anyway, these dolls are making news because they’re all shaped like chicks who dance in Magic City and King of Diamonds. So, is that all men need, son? Anything that looks like a fat ass? It doesn’t even need to be human ass? *Sigh* I’m fucking LOST out here, man!

Listen, even if we take away the companionship of a real woman, these dolls are going to have obvious deficiencies, fam. Like, can Shakira throw that ass back? Can Shakira ride? Can Shakira give that oral yahmean? Hell nah, bruh! On the real, if they could do all of that, then we’d need to worry about the rise of Skynet, folks. In that reality, sex would be the least of our worries. Coming back, dudes are really trying to fuck a balloon that’s shaped like a stripper? Sheesh, I don’t even know what to say, son. Times like these really give credence to the phrase “truth is stranger than fiction.”

In the end, shit like this is why I’m happy to be married, man. Keeping it a buck, these dating apps already seemed like a daunting enough task for me. Now, guys out here aren’t even trying to entertain talking to women. Ultimately, people say “don’t kink shame,” but fuck that, fam! I’m ABSOLUTELY judging any man who actually buys one of these things! By and by, instead of buying a doll called Shakira, go find a real Shakira and see if she’s down for the getdown. At the end of the day, I’m 100% positive it’ll be more fun that way, bruh. That is all. LC out.

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Mark Zuckerberg Invented Skynet

So, I won’t lie, son. I’m only halfway joking with the title of this post. On the real, Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook are flying really close to sun, man. I mean, artificial intelligence sounds good until Skynet has us all hiding underground. Ok, yes, that does sound far-fetched, but I don’t like the idea of AI developing its own language, fam. All in all, it doesn’t sound like Facebook has a proper handle on the situation.

Now, let me explain why “conspiracy theorist” LC is awake today. Apparently, an AI system being developed by Facebook created its own language. At first, researchers thought that the AI was speaking gibberish. This assertion continued until they realized that the different AI agents were able to understand this coded language. Basically, these muhfuckas gave up on English and were still able to talk to each other. To make matters worse, the same outcome has occurred in every scenario researchers have created.

Ok, let me get this straight, son. Scientists created the AI, programmed the agents to speak English and the agents said “fuck that.” Nah, fam, I ain’t comfortable with any of this shit, bruh. Before we know it, John Connor is going to have to send Arnold Schwarzenegger back in time to defeat the T-1000, man. Shit, all jokes aside, we’re setting a dangerous precedent if we’re creating technology that we can’t control. By and by, these inventions are supposed to help us, not have us on edge, fam.

In the end, maybe Elon Musk is right. Look, Zuckerberg is already a legend for everything he’s been able to accomplish this early in life. However; maybe he really doesn’t fully understand AI. All I know is, I’m not looking forward to a rising of the machines. Shit, people may be looking for a zombie apocalypse, but a robot apocalypse might really be around the corner, son. LC out.

P.S. I wholeheartedly believe James Cameron is from the future, son. I mean, he predicted all of this shit, man. Real talk, we all need to consult him going forward. Clearly, he’s the only one who can save us, fam. That is all.