Why The Hell Do I Like Desiigner’s “Timmy Turner”?

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To be honest, I got so much heaviness off my heart last week that frankly, I don’t want to talk about anything overtly serious today. Then again, with all of the fuckety-fuck shit going on in the world right now, I’m positive I’ll need to put my cape back on and save the planet from itself in the very near future. With that being said, today’s post was inspired by my fiancée. She overheard me singing Desiigner‘s “Timmy Turner” and she flatly asked me why I liked that song. After about five seconds of straight silence, I legit didn’t have an answer for her. So, today, I’m going to try and figure this out. Why on Earth do I like that God-forsaken song?

Now, for anyone who follows me on Instagram (@icantbefamous), I’m sure you’re familiar with a video rant I had a few weeks back about Desiigner’s New English mixtape. As a musician and sincere music fan, I try to stay abreast on any artist pushing the needle of the culture. However; by taking this approach to life, I’ve listened to my fair share of pure basura. After listening to Desiigner’s mixtape, I wanted to kick puppies off of bridges, have someone shoot a BB gun at my nuts and do a backflip into a piranha tank. Bruh, that was 30 odd minutes of some of the worst shit I’ve ever heard in my entire life. Most of the songs were under 3 minutes long and rarely consisted of more than a repeated chorus and maaaaaybe some semblance of a verse. Frankly, I was shocked a label of the pedigree of GOOD Music would release something of this caliber, or lack thereof. Fast forward a couple of weeks, the full version of “Timmy Turner” came out and I completely forgot what I was talking about.

If I’m going to be real, every single criticism I had for Desiigner’s mixtape is still in full effect on “Timmy Turner.” I still have no idea what the fuck that dude is talking about and the song is still basically nothing more than a chorus. However; for reasons unbeknownst to me, it all works on this song. With that being said, I still have so many damn questions, son. Why the hell is this song about a Fairly OddParents character? Why the hell does Timmy need a burner to kill everybody walking? What the hell does a “fine bitch” and BET have to do with anything? Seriously, what the hell is this song even about? I’ve already lost track of how many times I’ve said “hell” in this post, son. I’m so confused and I literally have no explanation for any of this, man. I sincerely need someone to help me make sense of all of this.

Since I’m not a hypocrite, I’ll admit I’ve been a fan of this song ever since it came out as a XXL Magazine Freshman Freestyle. Side bar, since when did a freestyle simply become nothing more than reciting the chorus of an unreleased song? Does everyone out there see what I mean? There’s absolutely no reason why I should like this song. In any case, you mix Desiigner’s dumbfounding weirdness with a melodic masterpiece of an instrumental by the legendary Mike Dean and you’ve got me, hook, line and sinker. Being someone who hated “Panda” and his aforementioned mixtape, it’s unbelievable I would like anything this guy released as much as I like this song.

In the end, I don’t think I’ve accomplished anything with this post. I’m still not sure why I jam out to this track. As I’m writing this, my fiancée is giving me the “what the fuck is wrong with you” look. Ultimately, who cares, though? Someone just tell Timmy Turner to keep it cool. Everybody walking doesn’t need to die. Now, before I go, if anyone reading this likes this song too, can you explain to me why? I’d legit like to know. Good day, folks.

Let’s Talk About Black-On-Black Crime


Now, I’m fully aware I dropped the ball on a post for Thursday. Hey, cut me some slack, son. Life happens to everyone sometimes. In any case, I’m back to round out my week of Blackity-Black, super Black topics. To put a cap on my latest series of ramblings, let’s talk about a lot of people’s favorite topic: Black-on-Black crime. With all of the events currently going on in the country, a select few have tried to distract the masses by bringing this concept up. It’s time for me to jump into the bullshit.

Let us begin by bringing up everyone’s favorite, as in least favorite, mayor: Rudolph William Louis Giuliani. Now, as I’ve previously stated on this blog, I’m a New York City native, born and raised. Meaning, I was here before Rudy’s tenure as mayor, and I’m still here long after his shift was completed. For those who aren’t familiar with this man, to him, his greatest claim to fame has been “uniting the city” after the September 11th terrorist attacks. Side bar, I put that last phrase in quotations because I know there are a multitude of firefighters who would disagree with that sentiment. In any case, I’m here to call attention to an interview this dude gave recently where, in response to the Dallas police shootings, he alleged there’s a “99 percent chance” a Black person would be killed by another Black person, and not by the police.

For me, that statement is the pinnacle example of a narrative that is consistently brought up by people who refuse to acknowledge police misconduct. The most infuriating part of this ploy is the fact it only tells one side of the story. Now, yes, if you looked into the FBI‘s statistics for homicides in this country, you will see that roughly 90% of Black homicide victims were killed by Black people. What naysayers neglect to tell you is the fact 83% of White homicide victims were murdered by White people. With that being said, I want everyone who’s reading this to go back and take a look at the embedded picture in this post. Those fraudulent statistics were posted by Donald J. Trump, the Republican nominee for president, on his Twitter timeline. These methods are used to distract people from the reality of the situation and shift the blame to another entity. Since the percentages for both races are so high, why do detractors conveniently leave out the part about their White counterparts killing their own people too?

Look, coming from an inner city neighborhood, I’m well aware of the fact there are potential dangers and pitfalls. In any community, there will always be individuals who are damaging to the fabric of a group of people. I will also tell you this: if I decided to shoot and kill someone tonight, I guarantee I’m going to prison for my offense. THAT is what Black people are trying to highlight when talking about police injustice. When a member of our community is unjustly killed by anyone, INCLUDING someone with a badge, we simply want that person to be held accountable. Too many times we’ve seen officers not even receive as much as a slap on the wrist for ending a Black person’s life. Just recently, here in New York, officer Peter Liang only got five years of probation and community service for murdering Akai Gurley. You mean to tell me, I can get locked up for driving with a suspended license, but this officer can go home after taking someone’s life? It’s complete bullshit, man. For a man like Guiliani to ignore police misconduct, when two of the most egregious examples of crooked policing happened under his watch, is an absolute joke. Don’t believe me? Go ask the families of Abner Louima and Amadou Diallo. I’m pretty sure neither faction was/is particularly fond of his brand of “justice.”

In the end, the point here is, don’t use an underdeveloped argument to excuse the misdeeds of some officers out there. For the life of me, I still can’t understand why police apologists can’t just admit there are officers who step outside of their boundaries and simply work to rid the system of these individuals. Don’t tell me to “respect myself” in order for an officer to respect me. When it comes to folks like me, we already respect ourselves. Most of us are law abiding citizens who simply want to freely live our lives. How about the officers our tax dollars support abide by the same laws they’ve sworn to protect? That seems like the more reasonable option. Good day.

P.S. I’m completely done with Charles Barkley playing the Uncle Ruckus role. In response to the unnecessary shootings of Philando Castile and Alton Sterling, Chuck thought it was a good idea to say that some Black people are “crooks,” which is why the dead victims were profiled in this manner. This no-ring-having ass fool! Go look at Castile’s record, dick! Oh, wait, there isn’t one! How dare he justify the shootings of people who look like HIM by spewing rhetoric that doesn’t even describe all of the dead people he’s disgracing. What were Diallo’s crimes? What were Sean Bell‘s crimes? What were Tamir Rice‘s crimes? In addition, why are we bringing up anyone’s record if it’s unrelated to the situation that led to the person’s death? It’s needless character assassination and a tactic used to devalue the lives of people who can’t defend themselves. Honestly, I hate people like Chuck more than anyone else. Traitors have no business even associating with us. He just needs to keep his dumb ass opinions for Inside The NBA, so Shaquille O’Neal and Kenny Smith can continue to let him know how useless his point of view is. Ok, now I’m really done. Adios, kind people.

Dear White Advocates…

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While race relations in this country currently seem to be at an impasse, I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out the growing mutual understanding between minority communities and certain factions of our Caucasian counterparts. With that being said, I’d like to speak directly to my White compatriots today. For every one of you who is beginning to understand some of the messages being presented by various members of the Black community, I’d like to give y’all a challenge today: talk some cotdamn sense into your prejudice White friends.

Honestly, it seems like everyday there’s a different White person who decides to jump all of the way out of the window and say something wholly outlandish. Let’s begin with a premium dick named Joe Walsh. About a week and a half ago, this former congressman-turned-radio host decided to share his thoughts about the tragic police shooting in Dallas via Twitter and high levels of fuckery ensued. Not only did this man threaten President Obama, with no repercussions, but he also told the world that “Real America” was coming for both Obama and Black Lives Matter. Now, I have a question, Mr. Walsh: who exactly is included in this “Real America?” Are the various minorities who are continuously, and unfairly, targeted by law enforcement not included in this “Real America?” Listen, murdering officers is an act no life-valuing person can condone, but simultaneously ignoring the concerns of the Black community AND blaming the entire community for the acts of a few rogue agents is absolutely preposterous. Dear White advocates, individuals such as Joe Walsh need to schooled on the lunacy of statements like this.

Now, let’s collectively turn our attention to Rep. Steve King. In case everyone missed this, on Monday, during an interview with Chris Hayes on MSNBC, King decided to enlighten the viewing audience on the superiority of White people in regards to their contributions to Western Civilization. In his eyes, no “subgroup” has done more to make America and Europe great than the good ol’ White race. In a sweeping display of revisionist history, Adolf King completely forgot to mention the Africans forced to work for free for hundreds of years, the Asians who built our railroad system, the Native Americans who kept the pilgrims alive during their first harsh winter and just about EVERY FUCKING PRODUCT WE USE IN THIS COTDAMN COUNTRY! Literally every milestone that’s been achieved on this side of the map has been reached in conjunction with various minority groups. To completely neglect this fact while championing White people above all other “subgroups” is the definition of White Supremacy. Is this dude serious? No, really, is this dude fucking serious?! Now, my White advocates, forget schooling, people like Steve King might simply be lost causes. I’m sorry, but we’ll just have to leave them behind.

While it may seem like I’m just railing against the racist ramblings of a select few, there’s a method to my madness. Generally speaking, it seems like when Black people make statements about our treatment in this country, our points fall on deaf ears. You always hear media types mention the necessity of having an “open dialogue,” but ultimately, sides are always chosen and nothing is ever truly accomplished. The less this dialogue appears to be one side simply yelling at another, the more we may actually be able to focus on the points being made. If White advocates are also able to relay messages of equality, maybe some of the detractors will start to open their ears and hearts. Honestly, we need all of the help we can get to soften some of these hardened hearts out here. Good day.

Yes, All Lives Matter…

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Now, I’m going to keep this post brief because I’m sure you can Google a million and one blog posts, articles and think pieces that explain the same thing. I’m only jumping into the fray because there are a number of idiots who still don’t seem to get the message. For those thick-skulled individuals, I’d like to reiterate the same argument anyone with a brain should understand: Black Lives Matter does NOT equal All Lives Don’t Matter. In actuality, as a people, we’re simply fighting for our lives to mean as much as anyone else’s.

Given the nature of this article, let me start by giving some background about myself. I’m a 30-year-old Black male with an engineering degree from a Top 25 university, a corporate job with a Fortune 500 company and a loving family. If you took one look at my résumé, you’d probably invite me over to your house to meet your mother and your sister. That’s right, I’m that awesome, son. However; I’m also from the Bronx, NY, meaning I’ve had more negative interactions with the police than I’d like to recollect.

My first real experience with the Boys in Blue came when I was 10-years-old. As I was leaving school, I saw two older kids fighting each other right outside the basketball courts. Now, as I’m sure you can imagine, a crowd gathered around in a circle to see who was inevitably about to catch that L. Side bar, for my linguistically-challenged readers, an “L” means a loss. In any case, under the usual circumstances, I would have been one of the many spectators. However; I’d previously gotten in trouble with my mother for not getting in from school in a timely enough fashion. With that being said, I decided to scurry home so I could avoid any possible punishment. Along my pathway, I saw a parked cop car with two officers sitting inside. As I walked past the car, I happened to make eye contact with the officer residing in the driver’s seat. No less than five seconds later, both officers got out of the car, yanked my book bag off, threw me up against the trunk of the car and asked me “who the fuck was I looking at?” Now, I was thoroughly confused because I couldn’t understand why two grown men would think it was just to physically assault a child. For about a week, I wondered what I did wrong and why I was targeted in such a manner.

This is a reality for countless minorities across this country. There’s a natural hostility towards law enforcement because a large number of encounters we have with police have an unnecessary air of aggression to them. I’m not even going to speak about the number of times I’ve been stopped thanks to the ridiculous Stop-And-Frisk law here in New York City. Before continuing, I want everyone to go back and re-read the second paragraph. Even with all of my accomplishments, there always seems to be enough “reasonable suspicion” for police to stop me.

For anyone who can’t relate to the anecdotes I’m sharing, telling minorities that police misconduct isn’t real is an unbelievable slap in the face. Despite the fact all of my troubles with the law can be whittled down to traffic violations, a sense of panic overtakes me anytime I come in contact with the police. Black people are always told to “comply with the law” in order to avoid any potential issues. However; even during these scenarios, we’re still treated as culprits. Despite being a licensed gun carrier and even taking gun safety training, Philando Castile still met his end on the opposite side of a cop’s gun. We’re damned if we do, damned if we don’t, damned if we speak, damned if we breathe and damned if we think.

In the end, the point behind Black Lives Matter is to prove that All Lives Matter. As soon as minorities in this country are treated the same way as every other citizen, we can successfully remove this needless division. Ultimately, that’s all we really want. Good day.

Stop Shooting The Cops!

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Honestly, I don’t even know where to begin when it comes to this topic. I have so many thoughts simultaneously floating around in my head, it’s hard to keep myself on track. However; I’ll start by saying this: stop shooting the cotdamn cops, man! With tensions at a remarkably high level between Black communities and our respective police departments, the recent murders of several officers in Dallas, Texas and Baton Rouge, Louisiana are making resolutions seemingly impossible.

By now, I’m sure everyone is familiar with the mayhem that occurred in Dallas back on July 7th. After a peaceful Black Lives Matter protest, where police were monitoring the event, Micah Johnson took it upon himself to kill five officers, injure another nine cops and wound two bystanders. According to Johnson, he was angry with both the police and the Black Lives Matter movement and wanted to “kill White people.” For him, this was a type of retribution for the numerous police shootings of Black males. In light of the recent deaths of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile, Johnson’s act of violence was looked at as direct revenge. Now, not even two weeks later, three officers were killed and another three were injured in Baton Rouge. As of the time I’m writing this, Gavin Long, an ex-Marine thought to be the lone shooter, was killed after the fatal attack he orchestrated.

Here’s the thing, I don’t think individuals like Johnson and Long realize, their actions are NOT helping our cause. There’s already a misguided narrative being perpetuated by cops, politicians and assholes on social media that officers are the real targets in this country. Despite the fact this notion isn’t backed by actual data, it’s all of the justification detractors need to ignore the now countless instances of police misconduct all over the United States. The reality is, when over 500 people have been killed by the police this year, the deaths of less than 70 officers, while obviously tragic, cannot be used as “evidence” of an imaginary war on police. In addition, this aforementioned “war” cannot and should not be used as rationalization for the various instances of cops wrongfully killing Black men.

Whether we’re talking about Amadou Diallo, Eric Garner, Tamir Rice, Walter Scott, Alton Sterling, Philando Castile, or any of the limitless names I could mention, all Black people want is for our murderers to be brought to justice. The only point we’ve tried to make is the fact a badge shouldn’t give someone the power to take another person’s life without any consequences. A badge shouldn’t give an overzealous authority figure the right to abuse his or her power and never face any retribution for his or her actions. As Black people, we simply want to be looked at as people and not some “threat” that needs to be neutralized. In every one of these scenarios, all an officer has to do is say “I feared for my life” or “I thought he had a gun” and the humanity of the victim goes out of the window. All proper procedure goes out of the window. The victim instantly becomes the villain because the dead can’t speak for themselves.

Now, while the anger is certainly palpable, anyone deciding to take the lives of random officers is doing a grave disservice to the aforementioned victims AND the officers themselves. As soon as the shooting in Dallas occurred, I no longer saw any news outlets provide significant coverage of the deaths of Sterling or Castile. They went from being a top story to just another blip on the radar. The lives of the cops instantly became more important than the lives of the Black men killed, and once again, naysayers used this as an opportunity to attack the Black community. They ignore our cries, and videos, of prejudice, they label the Black Lives Matter movement a hate group and they completely absolve any crooked officers of their wrongdoings. Instead of bringing light to our plight, these police killings further draw a line in the sand between both sides. Our ability to reach a mutual understanding with one another continues to suffer as a result. While some people like to use the “violence begets violence” argument, that doesn’t work when everyone becomes more set in their respective ideals.

Ultimately, if everything I’ve written here gets lost in translation, I just want to make one thing perfectly clear: I am NOT okay with the murders of these police officers. First, their respective families now have to deal with the unexpected and unnecessary loss of a loved one. Second, the misdeeds of other officers are unfairly being taken out on the wrong people. Lastly, these incidents overshadow the larger point being made about police misconduct. In addition, the Black victims always get lost in the shuffle. In the end, I truly hope things don’t continue to get worse before they get any better. However; I should probably know better than that. Good day.

Guess Who’s Back…


First off, I want to thank everyone who reached out to me and convinced me to start blogging again. From Facebook to Instagram to the random compatriots in my phone, I’ve received a large number of kind words and swift kicks to the ass to get the proceedings proceeding again. Knowing there’s still an audience interested in what I have to stay has definitely energized me. I know I have been an absentee wordsmith, but I promise to try to stay the course this time. I have a boatload of new ramblings to ramble and I can’t wait to jump back into the fuckery.

With that being said, stay tuned, folks. I plan on starting my comeback tour this upcoming Monday, July 18th. Also, be warned, this upcoming week is about to be a whole HEAP of Blackity-Black, super Black shit. Get yourselves ready. The Internet Thuggery is back. Good day.