A Date With The Booty Warrior: Paul Manafort & Michael Cohen Edition

So, someone is going to prison, son. Specifically, Paul Manafort and Michael Cohen are most likely going to prison, son. All I know is, Robert Mueller ain’t playing with these motherfuckers out here, man. Shit, in one day, both Manafort and Cohen took massive L’s in the court of law. Now, regardless of what Donald Trump would like us to think, he’s in a world of shit, fam. Look, Manafort’s guilt might not rattle him, but Cohen’s guilt must be keeping him up at night.

Ok, for those who missed it, shit got real yesterday. To begin, Paul Manafort, Trump’s former campaign chairman, was found guilty on eight counts of tax and bank fraud. Basically, Manafort had been doing all manner of fuckery with his money, unbeknownst to the government. Now, that in and of itself would’ve been huge news, bruh. However, shit got even realer when Michael Cohen, Trump’s former lawyer, pleaded guilty to tax evasion, falsifying submissions to a bank and campaign finance violations.

Now, allow me to go into more detail about that last charge, son. Look, this is where shit gets murky for Trump, man. Essentially, Cohen admitted, under oath, that he unlawfully used money to pay off women for Trump. Even worse, he asserted that he did it at Trump’s request. So, Cohen definitively implicated the fucking President in a series of crimes, fam. *Sigh* What a day, bruh. What a fucking day.

Look, the way I see it, Cohen’s guilt is way more consequential than Manafort’s. As of right now, Manafort’s issues fall squarely on Manafort. But, Cohen’s issues go way beyond the man himself. Hell, the dude is out here saying that he has proof that the Leader of the Free World is a fucking criminal, son. I mean, what else needs to be said here, man? How much more tomfoolery has to occur before the GOP disavows Trump, fam? For God‘s sake, enough is enough, bruh. Trump is making a fucking mockery of his office, brethren.

In the end, it looks like Manafort and Cohen have respective dates with the Booty Warrior. Ultimately, prison is never worth all of the nonsense, son. By and by, there’s no going back now, man. We all need to see where this Mueller investigation goes. At the end of the day, this shit is off to a fiery start, fam. That is all. LC out.

P.S. Everyone needs to familiarize themselves with The Boondocks in order to understand the name of this post. Frankly, “A Date with the Booty Warrior” is one of the greatest episodes of any show ever. Shout-out to Aaron McGruder, bruh. Good day.

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Donald Trump Is Vladimir Putin’s B*tch

Listen, let’s just skip the pleasantries, son. On the real, even if someone is a staunch Donald Trump supporter, they have to admit that yesterday was a fucking travesty, man. I mean, his post-meeting press conference with Vladimir Putin was one of the worst things I’ve ever witnessed, fam. Look, the American people had to witness the fucking President of the United States grovel at the feet of a foreign leader. All I know is, when will enough be fucking enough, bruh?

Ok, for those who missed it, yesterday was a complete and utter shit-show. Now, I already wrote about my skepticism of a closed-door meeting between Trump and Putin. However, I never thought the aftermath would be so insane, son. Like, I don’t even know where to begin with the nonsense, man. Shit, I could talk about the fact that Trump believes Putin over the U.S. intelligence agencies about Russian election meddling. Hell, I could even talk about the fact that Putin openly stated that he wanted Trump to win. In any case, their joint press conference was high-level fuckery, fam.

Look, here’s something that Trump doesn’t seem to understand: there’s a difference between meddling and collusion. Now, Robert Mueller‘s investigation is trying to determine whether or not Trump’s campaign conspired with foreign entities. However, the meddling part has already been proven, bruh. Like, we have unequivocal proof that Russian agents fucked with our election process, son. The problem is, Trump has too much pride to even admit this, man. Real talk, he simply refuses to acknowledge that outside influences helped him win the Presidency. In his mind, only his “greatness” propelled him to the White House.

So, here we are, fam. The American public has reached the point where our “leader” openly and frequently sucks up to a hostile nation. Listen, at this point, I don’t know how to explain what we’re witnessing, bruh. Keeping it a buck, I have no idea why Trump is so hell-bent on appeasing Putin, son. I don’t know if it’s because of potential business ventures or if Putin really has some dirt on him, man. Either way, Trump willfully betrayed his own country in favor of a foreign dictator. All in all, he disgraced every last one of us, people.

In the end, *sigh*. Ultimately, I don’t know what else to say, son. By and by, I’ve been legitimately baffled since yesterday, man. All I know is, I am still thoroughly confused about what I watched, fam. At the end of the day, Donald Trump cares WAY more about Russia than America, bruh. Frankly, the Republicans have to make a choice, folks. Are they going to stand up for this country, or are they going to continue doing the bidding of a traitor? The choice is theirs. That is all. LC out.

Why Is Trump Meeting With Putin?

So, I’m going to keep this post short today, son. Frankly, I don’t have a ton to say, man. On the real, I only have one simple question, fam: why exactly is Donald Trump meeting with Vladimir Putin? Like, what is the precise objective of this one-on-one meeting, bruh? In addition, why the fuck is the meeting one-on-one in the first place? All in all, my “spider-sense” is tingling like a motherfucker right now, folks.

Ok, for those who missed it, Trump is currently meeting with Putin in Helsinki, Finland. Apparently, the two “world leaders” want to hash out the differences between the United States and Russia. Now, it’s no secret that Trump has a love affair with Putin, son. I mean, he’s been singing Putin’s praises since the campaign trail, man. In any case, their relationship is highly problematic because Trump simply refuses to admit that Russia interfered with our election process. So, why should anyone feel confident about a closed-door meeting between these two men?

Now, before I continue, let me put some things into perspective, fam. Look, regardless of whether or not someone believes that the Trump administration conspired with Russia, it is a FACT that Putin’s country hacked the Democrats. Shit, Robert Mueller JUST indicted twelve Russian intelligence officers for hacking emails, bruh. So, we don’t even have to debate the tomfoolery, son. Real talk, we cannot trust Putin and neither should Trump, man.

Look, the problem is the fact that Trump can’t accept that a foreign entity helped him beat Hillary Clinton. Listen, like I said before, we can speculate whether or not the Trump team actively worked with Russian officials. However, we already have verifiable proof that Russia meddled with our election, fam. With that being said, it’s beyond me that Trump has so much fucking faith in Putin, bruh. Like, we have years upon years of evidence of Putin’s treachery, son. Plainly put, we can’t trust that fucking dude as far as we can throw him, man.

In the end, this entire scenario is sketchy as fuck, fam. Ultimately, we have a foolish president meeting with a conniving president in a closed-off setting. By and by, I don’t see what good can come of this, bruh. At the end of the day, I’m deeply troubled by what I’m seeing right now, son. *Sigh* I don’t even know what else to say, man. LC out.

Robert Mueller Is Putting Cases On All You B*tches!

Disclaimer: Everyone should read the title in Denzel Washington’s voice from Training Day. That is all.

So, shit just got real, huh? After all of the talk about Robert Mueller’s investigation, heads are starting to roll, son. With that being said, I’d be remiss if I didn’t get these jokes off about all of the fuckity-fuck shit going on in Donald Trump’s inner circle. In any case, let’s take a deep dive into all of the shit that Paul Manafort, Rick Gates and George Papadopoulos have gotten themselves into, man.

Ok, for those living under a rock, the shitshow began on Friday, fam. As the week came to a close, word got out that a sealed indictment was underway. From that standpoint, it was highly likely that someone was going to get arrested, bruh. Now, in light of that information, I assumed that Manafort was going to be the first to go down. Shit, after the FBI raised his crib back in August, it was only a matter of time before he was in a world of hurt, folks. Moving on, I was proven right when Monday came around. However; I would’ve never guessed the type of dirt that they have on him, people.

Basically, Trump’s former campaign chairman is a scammer, son. Since around 2005, he’s been laundering millions of dollars through overseas shell companies. Both him and his adviser, Rick Gates, have been living their best Joanne The Scammer life for well over a decade. As it stands, their fraud was still going on even after Manafort came aboard Trump’s team. Anyway, both men have been officially charged and are currently out of bail. In addition, both have pleaded not guilty to the accusations.

Now, the wildest part is, this isn’t even the wildest part of the story, son. Frankly, George Papadopoulos is the bigger news, man. Look, although Manafort and Gates have been involved in massive amounts of fuckery, the White House can still maintain plausible deniability. However; Papadopoulos’ tale is where shit gets interesting, fam. To begin, he’s already pled guilty to lying to federal agents. So, what did he lie about exactly? Russia, bruh. Russia.

As we now know, Papadopoulos, Trump’s former foreign policy adviser, was actively working with Kremlin-connected clowncakes to get dirt on Hillary Clinton. To make matters worse, in his own correspondence, he stated that he wanted someone low-level to meet with them in order to keep the heat away from Trump. Son, that has conspiracy written all over it! Real talk, the situation is so bad for Papadopoulos that he didn’t even try to fight the charges, man. The way I see it, I wouldn’t be surprised if he started rolling on everyone, fam. Shit, let the snitching begin!

In the end, all I can do is laugh at this, bruh. On the real, I doubt we’ve seen the last of the indictments, folks. Hell, I know Michael Flynn is somewhere sweating right now, son. Ultimately, a bunch of corrupt people were/are on Trump’s squad, man. Am I supposed to believe that he’s innocent of ALL of the fuckery? Give me a break, fam. I ain’t that dumb. LC out.