I Hate James Dolan So Much

Ah, yes, the fuckery has already begun, son. I just knew it wouldn’t take long for James Dolan to resume the tomfoolery he’s legendary for. I mean, it’s in his blood, man. For worst or for worst, this man just HAS to be in control of everything. After publicly affirming he wouldn’t stand in Phil Jackson‘s way when it comes to the basketball operations of the New York Knicks, reports are already saying he’s vetoing some of Phil’s changes. That’s terrific news for us Knicks fans, man. At this rate, we’ll still be a horrid team ten years from now.

Now, apparently the tension between Dolan and Jackson stems from Dolan not wanting Phil to fire certain people. Common sense would tell you, when a big budget team continually fails under the spotlight, major upheaval is necessary. But noooooooo, Dolan, in his infinite wisdom, wants to keep around the same personnel who’ve contributed to our woes for over a damn decade. Good Lord, man! Why can’t he just stay out of the fucking way? Doesn’t he realize he’s done more than enough damage to the franchise?! This fool even admitted he’s just a fan who’s expertise doesn’t lie in basketball, but he still can’t take a fucking backseat to the man he hired to do this job. Think about it, man. If he won’t even relinquish power to the “almighty” Phil Jackson, he won’t take second place to anyone.

In the end, FUCK!!! I’m REALLY not looking forward to the next decade of irrelevance, man. The Knicks organization just continues to find ways to break our hearts. I might really need to lock Dolan in the trunk of my car and refuse to let him out until he signs away his dominion over the team. That’s the only choice we have left, son. Who’s with me? Let’s go!

Let’s Talk About Wealth

Man, the average person seems to be really stupid when it comes to money, son. Actually, let me take that a step further. The average person who has the audacity to hate on the Internet seems to be really stupid when it comes to money. I mean, people of all ethnicities and ages fuck up when it comes to monetary gain, but it takes a special brand of idiocy to be clearly behind in the game of life and still have the gall to comment on someone else. With that being said, this post is dedicated to all of the Internet trolls who like to hate on the accomplishments of others.

To be clear, the idea for this post came to me after reading a fool’s comment on 2DopeBoyz. Side note, I have no idea why I even bother to scroll through the comments section of any website. Without fail, I feel dumber after reading the thoughts of an imbecile. In any case, some weirdo decided to take a shot at Jay Z after Forbes Magazine reported he’s still behind Diddy in terms of net worth. In addition, Dr. Dre has surpassed Jay and taken the second spot on the list. According to this man, it’s been too long for Hov to still be behind the curve. In turn, he should start telling the truth in his bars about his lower wealth. Excuse me, sir? Did this carpetbagger actually try to shit on a man who’s worth half of a billion dollars? This can’t be life, son! I’d love to know what that guy’s net worth is. I guarantee that stash of baseball cards he’s been holding onto since 1997 aren’t worth shit in these streets.

Anyway, why must we always try to tear down another person? I saw the same type of commentary when it came to Jay’s stake in the Brooklyn Nets. People tried to hate by saying he owned less than a percent, but how much of a professional basketball team do you own? Hell, at this point in time, Diddy has his own television network and Dre has the headphones game on lock. Instead of throwing darts on some petty shit, how about we congratulate the ones who were able to pull themselves up. To that dude from the comments section, don’t be mad because your Subaru continually runs out of gas on the highway, man. If you didn’t have so much hate in your blood, maybe you’d make something of your life too.

All in all, what the hell do any of us know anyway? Warren Buffett just recently bet a billion dollars no one would have a perfect bracket for March Madness. That’s more than Puff, Dre and Jay are even worth, son. In the end, we must be all doing something wrong. Good day.

Farewell, Herb Williams

Yesterday and today have been bittersweet days, son. On one hand, it was high time Mike Woodson got fired as coach of the New York Knicks. Any leader who’s completely incapable of making the necessary adjustments EVERYONE ELSE SEES shouldn’t be in a position of power. With that being said, it’s a damn shame Knicks-faithful Herb Williams got caught in the crossfire. After dedicating nearly my entire lifetime to this organization, he’s unfortunately become the victim of terrible coaching and even worse management.

Now, if there’s any question about Herb’s loyalty to the team, just take a look at how long the man’s been with us. He started playing for the Knickerbockers in 1992, and outside of a brief tenure with the Toronto Raptors in 1996, he’s been down as either a player, assistant coach or interim coach every since. That’s over 20 fucking years, man! Can the dude get a little bit of respect, son? All I know is, I hope the reports of him not being completely done with the team are true. The Knicks had the audacity to send Patrick Ewing to the Seattle SuperSonics in 2000, let’s not further disrespect another New York legend, man.

In the end, that’s it, son. There’s nothing else to say. Viva la Herb Williams!

I Need This X-Men Movie!

Maaaaaan, the 10-year-old inside of my spirit is beside himself right now. At the moment, I feel like the younger version of LC who used to sit in class and read X-Men and Spider-Man comics instead of my social studies textbook. With that being said, I CAN’T WAIT for X-Men: Days of Future Past to come out. Judging by the look of the trailers, this movie is about to be fucking amazing, son! I mean, when it comes to one of my favorite story lines ever, I can only hope Marvel would do it justice.

Now, I won’t bore you with the details, but all you need to know is chaos is happening everywhere in this saga. Here we are, in an alternate future, where Sentinels have hunted down all of the mutants and it’s up to Wolverine to go back in time and stop the shit before it ever starts. Are you hyped yet? Good! You should be. In any case, I shall not take up any more of your time, son. Just watch the damn trailers below. That’s exactly what I shall be doing for the rest of the day. Well, that and raising two kids. You get the point, right? Ok. Ciao!

Where Are Lolo Jones’ Friends?

Ahh, the Internet. The wonderful place where people put their feet in their mouths on an hourly, daily, weekly, monthly and yearly basis. It’s almost as if certain individuals fail to realize their words are open for the world to absorb, interpret and ridicule. Alas, if this faction didn’t exist, we would miss out on a lot of golden opportunities for entertainment. With that being said, where the fizuck are Lolo Jones‘ friends? While she’s always been someone who freely shares her opinion, whether anyone asked for it or not, she definitely jumped off of a bridge with her comments about Rihanna and Drake. But shit, man, I’m glad she did, because now I have something new to talk about.

Now, in case you missed it, frequent Olympic loser, Ms. Jones, decided to chime in on Aubrey hosting this year’s ESPY Awards. I’m positive she meant it as a joke, but why on Earth did she think a bit about Drake hosting in front of “all of Rihanna’s ex-boyfriends” would go over well with their respective fans? Then again, maybe if it came from a more credible source, the humor would be a little more appreciated. Let’s face it, no one wants to hear what an underachiever has to say. Honestly, since when did losers have the right to open their mouths and utter shit? She lost the right to run her trap after she tripped over that hurdle in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. At least in Rihanna’s field, she’s familiar with being number one. That’s a feeling Jones hasn’t even come close to sniffing on the grandest of scales. No one gives a shit about her indoor titles, son.

In the end, maybe I’m being too hard on Jones. Frankly, I don’t really care about the fact she put Rihanna and Drake in her jokes. Truthfully, I think I gave her the “c’mon son” face because she’s failed to live up to the hype in her profession. How about she worries about winning some events as opposed to coming at other people’s necks. That would be my little bit of advice. Good day.

What The F*ck Is Mimi Doing?

Nah, son. Naaah, son. NAAAAAH, SON! My brain literally cannot comprehend the fuckery of Mimi Faust right now. I mean, who in the hell told her sex tapes were still the wave, bruh? After all of the sob stories and the Stevie J/Joseline Hernandez bashing, this is what she chose to do to make herself hot in these streets? On the real, what does she even expect to gain from this? Kim Kardashian gets no respect, Paris Hilton has all but disappeared and Pam Anderson is old. The jig is all of the way up, son.

All jokes aside, ain’t Mimi in her cotdamn 40s, bruh? What part of the game is this, man? How is she going to explain this shit to her daughter? Not only did her “man” leave her and marry a former stripper, now she’s hanging from shower rods and getting her “double wrist” action on in WorldStarHipHop videos. Talk about falling off of a damn cliff, son. Can it possibly get any worse for this woman? These situations are all consecutive L’s, man. Mimi’s out here looking like Shock-Kim The Clown right now. I’m relatively sure she’s crying in her house at the moment.

In the end, I only have one message for Ms. Mimi Faust: NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOU BUST IT OPEN, WOMAN! Please, remove yourself from public consciousness. Thank you and have a nice day.

Who Are These Haters You Speak Of?

Man, they should’ve never gave some of you people the Internet, son. While I’m a firm believer in the First Amendment, I’m also a firm believer in calling fools out on their bullshit. With that being said, I’d like to address everyone with “haters.” According to the scriptures of Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, poor souls all around the world have to deal with the constant threat of haters. After seeing post after post after post after post, I’ve officially had enough, son. No, most of you peasants don’t have haters. Actually, most people don’t care at all, man.

Now, I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I’m tired of the desperate ploys for attention by a certain group of individuals. Day after day, I see countless examples of women sending messages to the “basic bitches hating while [they're] doing [them]” and dudes hollering about “getting to the money” while disparaging some imaginary foe. Man, shut the fuck up! 99 percent of the time, these scenarios are completely fabricated instances created by clowns to have something to talk about. It’s social media, son. Nobody gives a shit, bruh. The people who are really doing things in life don’t have the time to be constantly engaging with detractors. The time it took to write that message could’ve been spent actually acquiring something real. If all you have to your name is a fat ass or a pair of Foamposites, you might need to just go away and give up on life. Clearly, you don’t offer anything of substance to our society.

All in all, everyone in the web-o-sphere has haters the same way every chick on IG is a model. Side note, why does every “bad bitch” have booking info listed in their profile? Ain’t nobody hiring you, chica. You have no identifiable talent. Cut the bullshit, man. Good luck getting a bank loan by making that ass clap. Side note to the side note, keep doing it, though, because it looks amazing. In any case, people need to stop taking themselves so seriously. How about we all do better as a people? M’kay? Thank you very much.