My Bittersweet Thoughts About Jordan Peele’s Win

*Sigh* I guess I’m going to be that guy, son. Now, before I get skewered by the Black community, let me be clear: I’m not about to slander Get Out. Look, at this point, nothing else needs to be said about how great that movie was/is. I mean, the film gave us the concept of the “sunken place,” son. That, in and of itself, is good enough to explain the virtues of this movie. With all of that being said, I don’t know how hyped we should be about Jordan Peele‘s Oscar win for Best Original Screenplay. Let me explain why.

So, about a week ago, Vulture interviewed some of the younger Academy voters. As expected, Get Out became a topic of conversation. Now, during the course of that discussion, the younger voters admitted that the older factions of the Academy were resistant to Get Out. According to them, Peele’s film was “not an Oscar film.” This was noteworthy because a bunch of the people saying this had never seen the movie. So, simply based on its appearance, they reached the conclusion that Peele’s masterwork wasn’t good enough. Hmm, I wonder why that would be, man.

Look, if we’re keeping it a buck, we all know what the deal is, fam. The fact of the matter is, these older voters don’t see the art in Black movies. Real talk, they saw a Black director and a Black cast and said “no thank you.” All in all, that brings me to my main point: why the fuck do we care about the Oscars? Listen, for years we’ve had to beg them to acknowledge our artistry. Why? Why do we give the Academy and Hollywood so much power when they don’t respect our ideas? All in all, it’s hard for me to rejoice over Peele’s win when the Academy didn’t even want to watch his movie in the first place.

In the end, I’m not trying to shit on history, bruh. Look, it’s dope that Peele was able to do something that no other Black person has done. However; in my eyes, this is kind of a backhanded award, son. Ultimately, how can I value this achievement when the “powers that be” didn’t value the movie? By and by, we need to stop giving the establishment so much deference. At the end of the day, they don’t respect us. So, we have no need to respect them. That is all. LC out.

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Quincy Jones Doesn’t Give A F*ck

Listen, old people don’t give a flying fuckity-fuck, son. I swear, once people make it past “retirement age,” they do and say whatever the hell they want, man. All I know is, Quincy Jones DEFINITELY fits into that category, fam. Real talk, the legendary producer recently did interviews with GQ AND with Vulture. Needless to say, he let ALL of the hot takes go, bruh! All in all, I can see people having issues with some of his statements. However; his sit-downs with these well-known publications were HIGHLY entertaining, folks!

Ok, let’s just skip the formalities, son. On the real, I simply want to get straight to the fuckery, man. Now, in regards to the tomfoolery, I want to do something a little different, fam. Keeping it a buck, I want to go through some of Jones’s most ear-catching stories in bullet format. With that being said, here’s some of the shit that made me go “oh shit”:

1. Jones claims to have 22 girlfriends all around the world. In addition, despite being 84 years old, his women apparently range between 28 and 42. Now, even funnier, those ages are part of an agreement between him and his daughters. Look, this is a wild motherfucker, son!

2. When he was down with Lionel Hampton‘s band, they allegedly used to buy dope from Detroit Red. Now, this is notable because the man formerly known as Detroit Red eventually became Malcolm X. Sheesh, that’s some wild shit, man!

3. Jones claims that Ray Charles convinced him to try heroin for a few months. In addition, Charles’s addiction was apparently so bad, he used to have a guy shoot dope directly into his nuts. Look, if that story ain’t true, then Jones has the CRAZIEST imagination, fam!

4. Apparently, after the infamous James Brown concert where Prince embarrassed himself in front of Michael Jackson, Prince tried to run over MJ with his limousine. Bruh, that’s fucking HILARIOUS! I swear, Prince was always the king of petty. This is part of the reason why I’m still a huge fan of his.

5. Jones asserts that MJ’s monkey, Bubbles, hit his daughter Rashida. Now, hurting a child is never funny, but come on, son! Only MJ would get into some shit where his pet monkey hit a kid. Good Lord, Mike was a cotdamn legend but a weird ass dude, man!

6. Jones maintains that Taylor Swift is a bad songwriter, that Elvis Presley couldn’t sing and that The Beatles were terrible musicians. Listen, I can see A LOT of people being upset by these claims, but what the fuck can they say to Quincy Jones, fam? I mean, he’s a legend among legends, bruh. Just deal with it.

7. Jones said that Marilyn Monroe‘s breasts looked like pears. On the real, I don’t know why that’s so funny, but I laughed REALLY hard when I read that, son.

8. About twelve years ago, Jones allegedly dated Ivanka Trump. Now, in his own words, she had great legs, so OF COURSE he had to do it, man! Real talk, this man has been a dog, by his own admission, for DECADES!

9. Last but not least, Jones claims that Marlon Brando smashed James Baldwin, Richard Pryor and Marvin Gaye. Now, I’m not surprised by Baldwin. Hell, I’m not even surprised by Pryor. Look, Pryor has made jokes about his sexuality and his widow even confirmed the story. However; Gaye through me for a loop, fam. All in all, this tale doesn’t make one bit of difference to me. But, it’s bugged out how casually Jones said it, bruh. Shit, it’s almost as if he looked at the interviewer crazy for not knowing this information. At the end of the day, Jones has seen EVERYTHING, people!

In the end, long live Quincy Jones, son! Ultimately, that’s a wild ass dude, man! All I can say is, I can read/listen/watch his interviews all day, fam. By and by, shout-out to GQ and Vulture for getting him to let off these shots. That is all. LC out.