Umm, I Love Jill Scott

Disclaimer: My wife knows I love Jill Scott. Like, I looooove Jill Scott. So, don’t judge me, son. I’m going to be out here wilin’ today.

Ok, let’s just skip the formalities, man. Real talk, if anyone has ever listened to Jill Scott’s music, they’d already know she’s a freak freak, fam. With that being said, the video circulating around social media shouldn’t be a surprise, bruh. Regardless, the creep in me gives her two thumbs up, folks. I mean, come on, people! This is Grade A entertainment, brethren! All jokes aside, I didn’t need another reason to crush on Jill Scott. However, she definitely gave me one.

Now, for those who missed it, Scott is out here letting her freak flag fly. Apparently, at a (recent?) show, Scott gave the crowd a preview of her fellatio game. Like, she went through ALL of the steps on her microphone, son. She started with no hands, THEN she hit the two-hand pepper mill, THEN she gave some love to the balls and THEN she let the mic finish on her face. Side note, if anyone thinks I’m being crude, just watch the video, man. I didn’t make up any of this, fam. In any case, her simulation has opposing opinions on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Look, let’s be honest here, bruh. On the real, if anybody is taken aback by Scott’s actions, then they must’ve never heard a word she’s sang, son. Hell, before I continue, I want everyone to read some of her lyrics below:

Love slipped from my lips, dripped down my chin and landed in his lap…

Creamy lava landed on my skin and neck, blended with my all day Chanel scent…

Flip side, stomach meets sheets, he plows inside as if he’s making beats…

Listen, the moral of the story is, Scott’s BEEN with the shits, man. Frankly, that’s one of the main reasons why I’ve had a crush on her for so long, fam. Shit, her musical talents are a given, bruh. Plainly put, she has one of the best singing voices ever. However, she’s also freaky as a muhfucka, dawg. For God‘s sake, who doesn’t love that, man?!

In the end, long live Jill Scott! Ultimately, this video proves that she wasn’t bullshitting in them lyrics, son. By and by, Scott is exactly who she said she was, fam. At the end of the day, I’m here for all of it, bruh. Now, let me go holla at my wife and apologize for my public thirst. Good day. LC out.

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Enough Of The Goofy Sh*t, Nicki Minaj & Cardi B

So, let me keep it a buck, son. At this point, I don’t care who’s right, who’s wrong or who wrote what bar to what song. Frankly, Nicki Minaj and Cardi B need to knock off the goofy shit already. On the real, both of these women are successful, so why do they feel the need to continuously snipe at each other? I mean, honestly, what the fuck are they even fighting about, man? Seriously, as ugly as this feud has gotten, is it even based on anything real? Look, there’s enough room in the Rap game for the two of them. All in all, they need to just make music and leave the fuckery to 50 Cent and Ja Rule.

Ok, I won’t lie, fam. Real talk, I have no intention of outlining the details of the latest round between Nicki and Cardi. Hell, I’ll leave that shit to Pitchfork, bruh. In any case, all folks need to know is, the two rappers came for each other’s jugular veins on Twitter and Instagram last night. All I know is, I can’t keep track of who’s lying, who got punched by who or who was offered some fashion deal first. Shit, in the grand scheme of things, none of that fucking matters, son. From my vantage point, Nicki and Cardi need to just focus on themselves. Regardless of who people think is right, they both look nuts for engaging in such a manner. Like, don’t they have songs to record and shows to perform? Who the fuck has time for this nonsense, man?

In the end, I have nothing else to say, fam. Ultimately, Nicki and Cardi need to cut the foolishness out, bruh. By and by, Nicki’s place is already solidified and Cardi is as hot as any rapper has even been. At the end of the day, both of these women are doing the damn thing. So, they need to stop worrying about one another and get back to business. Or just scrap it out one time. Yes, I’m a hypocrite, son. A good 5-minute tussle will settle all differences, man. That is all. LC out.

Nah, Donald Trump, We’re Good On These Alerts

So, let me get straight to the point, son. Aiyyo, Donald Trump, check this out, bruh: we don’t need any alerts sent to our phones, man. Real talk, knock it the fuck off, dude. Shit, it’s bad enough that he’s ruined Twitter forever, fam. Frankly, I don’t need unfiltered shenanigans sent directly to my mobile device, brethren. All in all, how long will it take before he tries to propagate his propaganda on our phones, people?

Ok, at this point, I shouldn’t have to explain to anyone what’s going on here. I mean, I’m fairly certain that everybody with a smartphone got a Presidential Alert from FEMA. In any case, this was done as part of Trump’s National Wireless Emergency Alert System initiative. Now, I won’t lie, son. In case of an emergency, I can see how something like this would be helpful. However, we’re talking about a man who consistently uses technology and his position to spread vicious lies and dangerous rumors (word to Big Boi). On the real, I don’t want that type of person randomly popping up on my phone, man. Hell, I’d rather have a chick send me a nude pic with my wife in the room, fam. Side note, that is a complete lie, bruh. Ladies, don’t send me any nudes! I value my life, ma’am! Let me alone, Becky!

In the end, Trump and FEMA can keep their alerts, son. Ultimately, if I was really looking for information, I wouldn’t go to those sources, man. By and by, dudes like Trump would find a way to politically spin a cotdamn earthquake, fam. At the end of the day, I don’t need that type of energy around me, bruh. That is all. LC out.

What The F*ck, Cardi B & Nicki Minaj?!

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, both Cardi B AND Nicki Minaj need to be called out for unnecessary fuckery. At this point, what are they even beefing about, man? I mean, is it about who’s more successful? Is it about who raps better? Is it about who looks better? Well, let me tell them both something: NOBODY FUCKING CARES, FAM! Damn, both of these women are living their best lives but can’t seem to leave the dumb shit alone. All in all, New York Fashion Week is not the fucking time to throw hands, bruh!

Ok, to be clear, there are 80 million stories about why Cardi confronted Nicki at a Harper’s Bazaar party. According to Cardi, Nicki said something negative about Kulture, her daughter with Offset, and she wanted to lay hands on Nicki. Now, Nicki denies this but it seems as if she did like a tweet that said something disparaging about Kulture. In addition, Nicki previously dragged Stormi, daughter of Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner, into an argument about album sales. So, Nicki isn’t the most reliable source here, son.

In any case, Cardi thought it was a brilliant idea to confront Nicki at this NYFW party. Look, I have kids, so I understand wanting to molly-whop someone who slighted them. However, not at a fucking formal event, man! For God‘s sake, Cardi was wearing a damn Dolce & Gabbana dress! Let’s just say that ain’t the most functional outfit to scrap in, fam. On the real, both of these women are fucking wrong, bruh. Nicki is wrong for liking some bullshit on Twitter and Cardi is wrong for pressing the issue at this public event. Listen, these are grown fucking women, folks. They need to start acting like it.

In the end, I’m sick of hearing about this beef, son. Real talk, nothing positive has come out of this, man. Ultimately, Nicki looks like a bitter chick who’s mad that she finally has some commercial competition and Cardi looks like an uncontrollable wildcard who may block her blessings. At the end of the day, both women are too successful for this stupid shit, fam. By and by, they need to knock it the fuck off, bruh. Everybody loses here. That is all. LC out.

What’s Wrong With Nicki Minaj?

So, let me keep it a buck, son. Originally, I had no interest in speaking about any of Nicki Minaj‘s shenanigans. Frankly, I don’t care about her issues with DJ Self, Dream Doll, Mariah Lynn or Jessica Dime. I don’t care about her petty feud with Cardi B or her longstanding beef with Safaree. On the real, I’ve always believed that Minaj is way too successful to do half of the petty shit she does. However, her rant about “beating” Travis Scott in album sales is purely nonsensical, man. All in all, what type of shit is she on, fam?

Ok, for those who missed it, Minaj went deep into her “Twitter fingers” bag (word to Meek Mill). Now, her latest round of tomfoolery came as a result of her recent album sales. So, as some of us may know, Minaj dropped her Queen album last week. Anyway, the Billboard 200 numbers just came out and, needless to say, Ms. Minaj is not thrilled, bruh. Based on the calculations, her new album debuted at number-two, behind Scott’s ASTROWORLD.

Now, for most logical people, that would be the end of the story. But, nah, not for Minaj, son. Shit, instead of just celebrating a successful album, she took to Twitter to air her “grievances.” First, she criticized Scott for using tour bundles to boost his sales. Apparently, he’s including his album in the merchandise he’s selling. Side note, this ain’t even new, man. I mean, Prince, the Gawd himself, did the same thing with his Musicology album. Anyway, Minaj also poked at Scott for using Kylie Jenner and Stormi Webster to increase his hype. Hell, I guess it’s Scott’s fault that he procreated with a Jenner.

Look, this has to be a first, fam. Listen, I’ve never seen an artist explain why they have a number-two album. For God‘s sake, who the fuck cares, bruh? Like, why can’t Minaj just be happy? The last time I checked, Scott was minding his merry business, son. Real talk, I don’t see why Minaj felt it was necessary to diminish his accomplishments in order to lift herself up. Honestly, that’s counter to the “empowerment” she’s always preaching about. True empowerment isn’t built on the back of anyone else. Period.

In the end, Nicki Minaj’s constant need for validation is wack, man. Ultimately, someone at her level shouldn’t always have to prove themselves. By and by, her success should be enough for her. However, she always ends up trying to tell us that she’s great. All I can say is, it’s fucking unnecessary, fam. At the end of the day, Minaj needs to just take her numbers and go, bruh. That is all. LC out.

We Know Nothing About This LeSean McCoy Situation

Ok, I won’t lie, son. I can already see the angry responses to this post, man. With that being said, let me make myself clear from the jump, fam. Look, I’m not defending nor condemning LeSean McCoy in this article, bruh. Frankly, I know absolutely nothing about his potential involvement in Delicia Cordon‘s assault, folks. My thing is, no one else on social media knows anything either, people. So, can we stop presenting opinions as facts, brethren?

Now, for those who missed it, McCoy, a running back for the Buffalo Bills, may be in a world of shit, son. Just yesterday, a woman named Mia, who goes by @miamor_i_adore on Instagram, posted a pic of Cordon with her face bloodied. According to Mia, McCoy is responsible for Cordon’s injuries and she’s even alleged that he’s previously beaten his son and his dog too. Apparently, McCoy has a history of putting his hands on any and everything, man.

In any case, a few hours after Mia’s revelation, reports started to surface that Cordon was actually assaulted during a home invasion. It seems as if an assailant came into a house that Cordon shared with McCoy, pistol-whipped the woman and demanded specific items, including jewelry and a cellphone. Now, this is notable because McCoy has allegedly been trying to get Cordon out of his house for some months now. So, it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility that McCoy set this situation up. Mainly because it doesn’t appear that there was forced entry into the house.

Moving on, here’s my issue with this story, fam: there is WAY too much speculating going on, bruh. First, Mia and Cordon’s mother claimed that McCoy did this himself. Next, it was stated that he setup the home invasion. Either way, people on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook are repeating these stories as if they are absolute fact. Shit, it went from folks proclaiming that McCoy is an animal for beating Cordon to McCoy being an animal for setting her up. Well, which one is it, son? Which sin did he commit? Do we even know? Like, how are people so convicted when they literally have NO information about what really transpired, man?

Listen, I don’t want my words to be misconstrued here, fam. In the end, McCoy could very well be responsible for all of this, bruh. Ultimately, he could’ve been the person who orchestrated Cordon’s assault, son. By and by, I just want people to be well-versed in the facts before repeating stories as gospel, man. Frankly, folks are quick to believe anything on social media. At the end of the day, McCoy is absolutely a savage if he did this, brethren. All I’m saying is, let’s make sure he did it first before we make all of these accusations. That is all. LC out.

It’s Not Our Job To Make White People Comfortable

So, I won’t lie, son. I inadvertently started a shit-storm with yesterday’s post about Aaron Schlossberg. As of right now, my comments and direct messages are in shambles on both Instagram and Twitter, man. Apparently, some people think I’m racist because I referenced the fact that there’s a DOCUMENTED HISTORY of White folks fucking with people of color. Well, with that being said, let me be honest, fam: I’m not even remotely sorry. Look, it’s not my job to make White people comfortable, bruh. Frankly, it’s not the job of any minority. All in all, instead of feeling attacked, I hope our White counterparts will be advocates and hold the “bad apples” accountable.

Ok, before I continue, allow me to make myself clear: no, I don’t believe that all White people are racist. I mean, that’s just ridiculous, folks. *Sigh* It’s a shame that I have to do that, son. It’s a shame that anytime minorities tell our stories, the first thing some White people say is “it’s not all of us.” Dammit, nobody said it was all White people, man! Shit, I sure as hell didn’t! In actuality, what I’m saying is, there are MORE than enough instances of prejudice and bias to warrant a cultural change. For God‘s sake, instead of playing the victim, maybe these individuals can help shift the paradigm, fam!

Listen, only a fool would think that Schlossberg is some isolated incident, bruh. On the real, people of color see this type of hatred every single day, son. It’s a reality that we CONSTANTLY have to deal with, man. The fact of the matter is, our safety and well-being is more important than White people’s comfort. Keeping it a buck, I don’t care that some folks don’t want to have to deal with these harsh truths. Minorities shouldn’t have to downplay our pain just to pacify others. At the end of the day, all we’ve ever wanted is to be treated fairly and equally.

In the end, I hope this post clears up any ambiguity, fam. Ultimately, I thought it was pretty obvious that I wasn’t speaking about all White people. I was speaking about Aaron Schlossberg and anyone else who thinks like him. In addition, I’m well aware of and thankful for all of the allies who consistently work towards equality. By and by, a collective effort is the ONLY way to rid our society of the racial ills that have ALWAYS plagued us. That is all. LC out.