Can Donald Trump Stop Politicizing Syria?

To begin, I just have one question. Is there literally NO issue that won’t be politicized? I mean, why must every situation and circumstance become some ideological debate? Look, some things just aren’t politics, son. Why can’t our government understand that? All I know is, a chemical attack in Syria is not the time to bash a previous administration. With that being said, can Donald Trump stop politicizing the deaths of Syrian people?

Now, before I continue, let’s just get one fallacy out of the way. Trump doesn’t give a flying fuck about the citizens of Syria. First, he tried to block Syrian refugees from entering our country in not one but TWO travel bans! Innocent men, women and children have been trying to flee from Bashar al-Assad’s wrath for years now. Trump has been the main proponent of denying them help. So, am I now supposed to believe he gives two shits about their well-being? Man, get the fuck out of here with the tomfoolery!

Moving on, during Barack Obama’s presidency, Trump constantly used Twitter to try and deter Obama from acting on Syria. Shit, as recently as 2013, Trump asserted that Syria was “not our problem.” Hell, just last week, Rex Tillerson, our current Secretary of State, stated that Assad’s tenure should be “decided by the Syrian people.” Now, the entire administration wants to change course and berate Obama for not doing something about Syria sooner. Man, these clowns have GOT to be fucking kidding me, man! The hypocrisy is so blatant that it literally hurts my head, son.

Look, at some point, Trump has to realize that he’s the President now. He can’t keep blaming the previous administration for issues that are happening under his watch. If Trump really gave a shit about Syria, he wouldn’t have tried so hard to keep their refugees out of our country. In addition, if he were really serious, he would grow some balls and call Vladimir Putin out. Lest we forget, Russia is one of Assad’s biggest allies. Despite this fact, nobody in Trump’s administration has even uttered a word about Putin. Hmmmmmm, I wonder why, son. Could it have anything to do with a congressional investigation? Listen, I’m just saying, bruh.

Ultimately, Trump wanted to ban Syrians from our country, he accused their refugees of being ISIS and now I’m supposed to believe he cares? *Sigh* I truly, truly hate our political system, man. All in all, it’s despicable to politicize death. That’s exactly what Trump and company are doing. Let’s just call a spade a spade, son. LC out.

Hey, Hillary, Just Blame Colin Powell

Honestly, I’m tired of talking about Hillary Clinton, son. I’m also tired of talking about Donald Trump and I’m tired of talking about this entire presidential election. Up until this point, this whole race has been nothing but high-grade, top shelf tomfoolery. Day after day, the shenanigans increase at alarming rates and it pains me to know one of these two people will most likely be our next president. With that being said, Hillary’s private email saga simply won’t die, man. Now entering the realm of stupidity is none other than Colin Powell. Apparently, he’s done the same foolishness Hillary’s now in trouble for. How splendid, son. How splendid indeed.

Now, here’s the thing I don’t understand about the Democrats strategy here: do they really believe dragging Powell into this is going to make Hillary look better? Look, son, if I kick a puppy in the face, I can’t bring up another person who kicked a puppy in the face as if that makes my action alright. The fact of the matter is Hillary was having inappropriate conversations on her private email server. Regardless of how all of her supporters try to spin this, just because Powell was talking to foreign leaders on his own private email server, that doesn’t justify Hillary’s email use.

Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself, but for those who missed it, back in 2009, Powell informed Hillary of the virtues of using a private email server. Apparently, during his tenure as Secretary of State, Powell used this method to essentially circumvent the government servers. Now, as we all know, the GOP has been trying to crucify Hillary for her email-related behavior. With that being said, the Democrats have released old conversations between Powell and Hillary in an attempt to reshape the narrative. However; I’m not drinking the Kool-Aid, son. Showing evidence of someone else’s wrongdoing doesn’t make everything okay. As far as I’m concerned, we should dig up BOTH of these fools’ past emails. Let’s see just how far down the rabbit hole the shit goes, man. No one should be safe, bro.

Honestly, I have nothing else to say. I hate our presidential candidates, man. All of them. They all suck, son. On the real, everyone needs to just pencil me in on their November ballot. At this point, I’m positive I can do a better job than these clowns. Well, then again, my temper might result in World War 3. Nah, I’ll be cool. I promise. Good day.

Please, Short-Circuit Hillary Clinton’s Mic

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Ok, I think it’s time we have a candid conversation about Hillary Clinton. There’s an ugly truth Democrats don’t want to admit about their presidential nominee: a loooooooot of people straight up don’t like her, son. The problem is, more than a few of her actions don’t necessarily help her cause at all. At this point, her email server scandal shouldn’t be news to anyone. That situation alone causes certain Democrats to flatly look over her and a ton of Republicans to call for her to be hung in Times Square. With that being said, the former Secretary of State doesn’t seem to know how to remedy her own dilemmas. Now, if anyone needs any more proof, her latest “short-circuit” should give people a clear example of her real issue.

Ever since the FBI investigation into her private email server, Clinton has been telling everyone who would listen that director James Comey said all of her statements regarding the matter have been “truthful.” However; that is definitely NOT what the director said. In actuality, he said she was “extremely careless” with her actions and couldn’t really comment on her public assertions. In addition, while she maintains the facade she never shared any classified information in her emails, Comey’s findings directly contradict that theory. Frankly, the final conclusion was the fact that Hillary’s shit stinks, but not enough for the bureau to drape her in an orange jumpsuit.

So, now that I’ve gotten all of that information out of the way, let’s talk about the elephant in the room. Honestly speaking, if this were a normal election, and if Donald Trump wasn’t a raging psychopath, Clinton would be in real danger of being unelectable. Simply combine the fact she’s been a Washington, D.C. constant since the Stone Age and a high percentage of Americans don’t seem to trust her, not a lot of folks really feel enthused to give her their vote. At this point, I can’t even recall the amount of times I’ve heard people say they’re only voting for her to prevent Trump’s bid to destroy the planet. That doesn’t sound like much faith in her candidacy, son. I truly believe if she were up against a more solid opponent, she’d be left in the dust. Hell, ain’t that what happened with President Obama all those years ago? In the beginning, no one really thought some upstart senator from Chicago could derail her campaign. Alas, eight years later, she’s still trying to get into that Oval Office, man. Shiiiiit, maybe the writing has been on the wall when it comes to her.

In the end, voting for the “lesser of two evils” may seem like the right thing to do, but I’d be lying if I said this shit wasn’t mentally draining, son. Why do the candidates for the two most visible political parties suck sooooo much, man? Forget it, though. I might just have to run for president myself. I can’t possibly be any worse than these two individuals. Good day.