So, I won’t lie, son. This post is a little hard for me to write, man. I mean, as much as I engage with the outside world, I’m still a pretty private person. In any case, at this particular moment, I feel like being transparent with everyone. Not only for my own well-being, but for anyone else who may be in my shoes. All in all, depression is a bitch and I know it affects a large number of folks out there.
Ok, anyone who follows this blog knows that I took a week off from writing recently. Now, as a disclaimer, I told people that I was taking a break because I was “burned out.” The truth is, my longtime depression has been kicking me in the ass for some weeks now. Frankly, I didn’t want to write about anything, fam. In addition, I haven’t wanted to go to work and I’ve had no interest in answering phone calls. *Sigh* I guess those are the breaks when depression rears its ugly ass head, bruh.
Now, if I’m being real, I believe a lot of my current state is due to anxiety. Namely, anxiety about the future. Look, anyone who knows me knows that I live in my head. I’m constantly planning and constantly trying to figure out my next move. Anyway, despite the fact that life is going really well right now, I’m still trying to map out the road ahead of me. For example, I’m trying to figure out where my career is going. Also, I’m trying to figure out where this blog is going. Hell, I’m even trying to figure out where my music is going. All of this while trying to be the best husband and father I can be. By and by, I’m trying my hardest to ignore that annoying ass self-deprecating voice in my head.
With all of that being said, I am super thankful for the people who check in on me. In all honesty, this post isn’t really about LC at all. On the real, I want to talk to anybody out there who may be going through their own issues at the moment. Listen, don’t be afraid to reach out to family and friends. Don’t be afraid to speak up about any trials or tribulations. Real talk, there’s no need to feel ashamed about it. A lot of times, people don’t get help because of their own personal hang-ups. All I can say is, none of us should let our idiosyncrasies hold us back from getting better. In the end, like I said in a previous post, it’s okay to not be okay. Ultimately, acknowledging it is the only way to move forward. That is all. LC out.