Chill Out With The F*cking Fireworks!

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, I’m pretty fucking heated right now. Ok, yes, as a native New Yorker, I understand how folks get down with the fireworks in the summer. However, shit is beyond egregious this year. Like, motherfuckers have completely lost their minds with these fireworks, man. I mean, every night, fam? Every fucking night?! All I know is, everybody needs to chill the fuck out with these cotdamn explosions, bruh.

Ok, for those who are deaf, in a city near you, folks are absolutely bugging with the fireworks. Now, at first, I thought it was just an NYC thing. Shit, I’m from the Bronx, son. Frankly, the minute that June hits, I’m used to cats letting off the illegal Rockets and Roman Candles. But, this year has been different, man. Look, maybe it’s because of the quarantine and the fact that people are beyond restless. However, every single night, for hours on end, fools are outside blasting every firework in existence, fam.

Hell, just look at the numbers, bruh. In major cities all across America, fireworks complaints are up as much as 4000% compared to last year. Son, shit has gotten so bad that I seriously considered going outside and beating people with my belt buckle. All I can say is, I have no idea why people chose this particular summer to go totally haywire. Now, like I’ve said before, maybe this is the fallout from the coronavirus and all of the social distancing, man. But, why the fuck do these idiots think this is the solution? Fam, newfound freedom shouldn’t be infringing on anyone’s peace of mind. Yeah, I’m the old, washed and ornery guy now. Fuck it.

In the end, I need everyone to just shut the fuck up. Ultimately, NO ONE wants to hear fireworks all night long. By and by, a few of us are one step away from shoving a Roman Candle up someone’s ass and seeing if they take off like a jetpack. At the end of the day, all of this feels like a conspiracy. However, I have no clue what the endgame is. That is all. LC out.

The Coronavirus Isn’t Over Just Because You Want It To Be

So, before I begin, let me say that this is probably going to be a very New York-centric post. Mostly because my state has the most coronavirus cases in America. But, the more that time passes, the more I see folks using super questionable judgment. Ok, yes, I know that people are tired of being in the house. But, the virus isn’t gone just because people want it to be.

Now, before I continue, I’ll admit that this COVID-19 shit is old, son. Like, folks have been social distancing for about two months now and it’s having some real consequences. Shit, as of right now, nearly 40 million Americans have lost their jobs, man. Frankly, businesses are tanking, the stock market is all over the fucking place and the economy can’t take anymore of this shit. So, I completely understand the need to “reopen” the country. However, folks need to be waaaaaay more calculated about all of this, fam.

Look, on my block right now, people are sitting on stoops, not wearing masks and congregating in sizable groups. All I can say is, folks are operating with a complete disregard for their health or the health of others. Real talk, I would love nothing more than to vandalize a happy hour, bruh. But, I’m also a man with a mother who contracted this virus with only minimal exposure to the outside world. Meaning, this sickness is still incredibly insidious, son. The truth is, I would love to run amok outside, but we need to handle this situation intelligently, man.

In the end, I don’t know what else to say, fam. Ultimately, I wholeheartedly agree that we need to get the nation up and running again. However, we all need to be responsible, bruh. By and by, it feels like cats are trying to reach herd immunity the fucked up way. At the end of the day, without a vaccine, the only way to get to herd immunity is for all of us to catch this shit. Keeping it a buck, the way people are moving, that’s exactly what’s going to happen, son. *Sigh* That is all. LC out.

Dudes Need To Chill, If I D’ussé So Myself

*Sigh* Another day, another dude accused of some tomfoolery against women. Like, at this point, I’m running out of things to say on these issues, son. I mean, I’ve literally never understood why it’s so hard for some men to comprehend consent. For God‘s sake, there are so many women who are down for the get-down. There’s NO need to force any action with anyone. With all of that being said, ChriStylezz from D’ussé Palooza is the latest guy to be held to the fire.

Ok, for those who are unaware, Christopher Samuels, better known as ChriStylezz, is in some shit. Now, as one of the (former) hosts for D’ussé Palooza, Samuels was popular on the party scene. Shit, as a native New Yorker, I’ve been down with Palooza since it was Henny Palooza. Real talk, I’ve watched the brand grow from house parties in the city to Jay-Z partnerships and events at the Barclays Center. Needless to say, I was disheartened to hear the stories that some women had to say about Samuels.

Now, I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I’m an expert on this situation. However, multiple women have told similar stories about Samuels. Apparently, he’s notorious for pressuring women into having sex with him and he’s admittedly disrespectful during the process. Hell, homie even got on his own Instagram page to speak about “being an asshole.” Oddly enough, he also implored women to “bring [him] to justice” if he ever raped them. All in all, I don’t even think it’s a question of “if” he did something wrong. Clearly, even HE feels like his behavior was suspect.

To make matters worse, my homegirl showed me another post from a woman who’s making claims against Kameron McCullough, the founder of D’ussé Palooza. In addition, I’ve seen yet ANOTHER story about questionable actions by BlogXilla from Global Grind. Now, I can’t definitively say that these situations happened. So, I have to throw the word “allegedly” in there. But, nothing would surprise me because this type of behavior is frighteningly commonplace. All I can say is, I’m genuinely sad for the victims and perplexed that these incidents still occur.

In the end, I’m tired of having this conversation, man. Ultimately, I’m tired of women being taken advantage of. Fam, in one Twitter post, Samuels actually asked if it’s wrong to ask a woman for sex to give her a job. Even worse, half of the people who responded didn’t see an issue with this. *Sigh* All I know is, I’m running out of way to this say, bruh. Listen, men, consent is consent is consent. There’s no need to pressure a woman, there’s no need to threaten a woman and there’s no need to trick a woman. At the end of the day, just find someone who wants the same thing. It’s fucking simple, people. That is all. LC out.

RIP Fred The Godson

So, I’m going to keep this post super short today. All I want to say is, Rest In Peace to Fred The Godson. On the real, as much as people try to deny the coronavirus‘ impact, this should be a wake-up call. The fact is, this virus doesn’t discriminate, man. It doesn’t care about race, gender or political affiliation. All in all, we MUST take the necessary precautions to keep each other as safe as possible.

Ok, for those who missed it, Bronx rapper Fred The Godson was dealing with the virus for the last month or so. Shit, I knew that things were suspect when he went to the hospital and needed a ventilator. Even then, I still didn’t think that he’d actually die, fam. All I know is, there has been so much misinformation about this illness. One faction says that only elderly people get it. Another faction actually believes that Black people can’t really get it. Look, all of that shit is nonsense, son. The truth is, ALL of us need to do our best to strengthen our immune systems. Yes, that includes diet and exercise, brethren. Now, I’m not going to front like this guarantees safety, but it surely helps, folks.

In the end, prayers to Fred’s family and friends. Ultimately, I’m fucked up because we’re roughly the same age and I’ve met him more than once on my music journey. All I can say is, this shit hits waaaay too close to home, son. By and by, let’s not play fast and loose with this disease. At the end of the day, ALL of our lives are at stake, man. That is all. LC out.

I Want To Beat Up Those Teen Boys Myself

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, as I’ve said countless times before, I’m going to try and keep this post short today. All I can say is, I want to put hands, elbows, knees and feet on all of those dudes who jumped that girl in Brooklyn, New York. Like, what in the actual fuck, man?! Seriously, on what planet is it ok for any guy, let alone a group of guys, to beat up on a girl? The way I see it, the authorities need to throw ALL of these stupid motherfuckers under the jail.

Ok, for those who are unaware, some real fuckery occurred in my city last week. Now, I don’t know the context behind this incident, but honestly, it doesn’t even fucking matter, fam. All I know is, a group of teenagers, mostly male, jumped a 15-year-old girl in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. Sadly, the entire episode was captured on camera and it involved a bunch of dickheads punching and kicking a defenseless girl. From there, a couple of them are seen walking off with her Air Jordan sneakers.

Now, at the moment, 12 losers (all between the ages of 14 and 17) were charged for the assault. Shit, the mother of one of those boys is on some “I wanted to kill him with my bare hands” shit. All in all, I fucking feel her, bruh. Real talk, if either one of my boys ever did some shit like this, I would let that girl’s father fuck them up. On the flip side, if a group of boys ever did that to my daughter, I’m putting a bat to everybody’s kneecaps. Keeping it a buck, I have no idea how something like that was even allowed to transpire, son. Hell, I don’t get how not even a single soul thought to stop this from happening, man. With that being said, string all of those bitch ass bitches up, fam.

In the end, I don’t know what else to say, bruh. Ultimately, that video made me furious, son. By and by, I don’t want to hear ANYBODY ask “what did she do?” It doesn’t fucking matter, man. At the end of the day, there is NO scenario that can justify what those boys did to that girl, fam. At this point, the law shouldn’t show any of these vagabonds mercy, brethren. That is all. LC out.

RIP Pop Smoke

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, I’m running out of things to say when an artist dies prematurely. I mean, the shit seems to happen so often that I don’t really know how to properly express how tragic these situations are. In any case, I just want to say rest in peace to Pop Smoke. All in all, fuck the music, man. The way I see it, a 20-year-old just shouldn’t go out this way, fam.

Ok, for those who missed it, Pop Smoke, an up-and-coming rapper from Brooklyn, was gunned down in the Hollywood Hills home he was staying in. Apparently, sometime after 4AM on Wednesday morning, a bunch of dudes ran up in the house and shot Pop. Now, at first, it was suspected that he was killed during a botched home invasion. However, as more evidence comes to the light, it appears as if he was targeted from the jump, bruh.

Look, there are several things about this incident that don’t make sense, son. First, let’s talk about the four assailants, man. Now, as they left the house, which is owned by Teddi Mellencamp and Edwin Arroyave from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, they didn’t leave with any stolen merchandise. Second, when the police were called, they were called by someone from the East Coast. Fam, does that even sound right? A shooting happens in Los Angeles and someone from across the country is the one to report it? Nah, bruh, I’m calling all types of shenanigans right now.

Now, we don’t have proof of anything, but it’s suspected that the shooting may have been related to Pop being a Crip. Either way, this crime was fucking senseless, son. Like, he was literally just getting started, man. Shit, he just released Meet the Woo 2 a couple of weeks ago and I’ve been playing “Christopher Walking” on repeat since before it dropped. In addition, he was just out there at Paris Fashion Week and a bunch of other high-profile events, trying to get away from the bullshit, fam. All I can say is, he never got a chance to fully integrate himself into his new life.

In the end, the nonsense needs to stop, bruh. Ultimately, nothing good ever comes out of this type of violence. Frankly, there’s probably going to be some kind of retaliation and some dudes are going to end up in prison. By and by, what’s the fucking point, son? At the end of the day, everyone loses at this street shit, man. So, leave the streets (and dumb motherfuckers who love the streets) alone. That is all. LC out.

P.S. Cats need to knock it off with that “he posted his own address, he did it to himself” shit. Fam, knowing where someone lives doesn’t give idiots the right to just run up in there and murder them. *Sigh* Folks ain’t safe anywhere, man. It’s a damn shame.

‘Power’ Recap: Paz Is The Dumbest Motherf*cker Ever

Disclaimer: I’m sure everybody understands how spoilers work, son. Act accordingly.

So, despite the fact that I’ve seen every single episode of Power, I believe that I’ve only written about the show twice. Side bar, in both cases, I was busy cursing out Tariq St. Patrick. In any case, last night’s episode was so preposterous, I felt obligated to talk about it, son. With that being said, let’s get into all of Paz Valdes‘ unscrupulous shenanigans.

Ok, before I even continue, let me make one thing clear, man. Real talk, NOBODY asked for a Paz Valdes episode, fam. Like, who gives a flying fuckity-fuck about Angela Valdes‘ sister, bruh? Shit, I barely gave a fuck about Angela, son. So, why would the team at Starz dedicate an entire hour to this doof of a woman? All I know is, NOTHING she does in this episode makes sense, people. So, let’s talk about some of her tomfoolery.

To begin, despite the fact that EVERY law enforcement agency has advised her that James St. Patrick didn’t kill Angela, Paz is still on a kamikaze mission. Now, since she’s hell-bent on bringing Ghost down, she makes several idiotic moves. First, she goes to Ghost‘s club and tries to get him to confess on tape. When that doesn’t work, she turns over incriminating evidence against her sister with the hope that it’ll bring down Ghost too. When that doesn’t work, she tries to convince Tommy Egan to kill Ghost, which is hilarious because Egan is the one who ACTUALLY killed Angela. Finally, after ensuring that her family will never get Angela’s pension, Paz turns down the money left in Ghost’s will. Meaning, her son and her father will continue to suffer under the weight of poverty.

Furthermore, the believability of this show continues to be nonexistent, man. Am I really supposed to believe that Paz would be able to sneak a gun into Ghost’s club? Especially since he’s running for Lieutenant Governor of New York? Man, if y’all don’t knock it the fuck off, fam. Keeping it a buck, Power stopped being realistic after Kanan Stark miraculously made it out of a burning building. Since then, the dialogue has been trash and the plot has been ridiculous. The truth is, I’m only watching the show because I need to finish what I started, bruh. At this point, I’m too far in to stop now, brethren. Side note, there’s a sexual pun in there, but I’ll just leave that in the air.

In the end, miss me with the Paz Valdes stupidity. Ultimately, no one needed this episode, son. By and by, Angela wasn’t as innocent as Paz likes to think she was. At the end of the day, Angela was a willing participant in Ghost’s nefarious activities. So, she got herself in the middle of some shit she had no business being in. From there, the streets did what the streets do, man. All I can say is, good riddance to the entire Valdes family, fam. That is all. LC out.

6ix9ine Finessed The System

So, here we are, son. After about a year of judges, lawyers and copious amounts of snitching, we finally know the fate of Tekashi 6ix9ine. Now, based on the charges he was facing, 6ix9ine could’ve been hit with a minimum of 47 years in prison. However, thanks to telling on everyone in Nine Trey, exposing people’s cards during Spades and revealing who shot Ghost in Power, 6ix9ine’s potential sentence has been DRASTICALLY reduced. *Sigh* I guess snitching really does pay, man.

Ok, for those who missed it, Judge Paul Englemayer officially let 6ix9ine know his future. Side bar, I’m calling him Daniel Hernandez for the rest of this post, fam. The way I see it, he’s not allowed to have a cool rapper name anymore, bruh. Anyway, thanks to Hernandez’ testimony against Aljermiah “Nuke” Mack, Anthony “Harv” Ellison, Kifano “Shotti” Jordan and the rest of the Eastern Seaboard, Englemayer gave him a two-year prison sentence. Keep in mind, Hernandez is also getting credit for time served. Meaning, he only has 11 months left behind bars.

Now, thanks to his cooperation, Hernandez’ lawyers hoped that he would be immediately released. However, Englemayer rebuked that theory. According to him, a lot of these crimes wouldn’t have been committed without Hernandez’ help. In fact, a bunch of the attempted hits were against other rappers that Hernandez had issues with. So, Englemayer didn’t just want to let him completely off of the hook.

Taking a step back, I want to briefly talk to the folks who are trying to justify Hernandez’ actions. Listen, he was a WILLING participant in Nine Trey’s fuckery, son. Frankly, he had NO problems with their movements when he was literally authorizing violence on other people (Trippie Redd / Chief Keef). He had NO problems with their movements when he was starting shit with gang members from Los Angeles and Chicago. But, as soon as the energy turned to him, he ratted everyone out. So, nah, the caping has to stop, man. On the real, he’s not a fucking victim here. The way I see it, he invited all of this chaos into his own life. That’s how karma fucking works, fam.

In the end, Hernandez finessed the system, bruh. Ultimately, he’s getting only a small fraction of the consequences for his actions, son. By and by, we’ll see if anybody tries to make a move on him. At the end of the day, he’ll probably be looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life, man. *Sigh* I wonder if the success of “Gummo” was worth it, fam. Probably not, bruh. Probably not. That is all. LC out.

The Tomfoolery Of Karol Sanchez

*Sigh* I hate teenagers, son. Like, these are the times where I fully embrace being a dude in his mid-30s, man. The truth is, a lot of these teens are out of their cotdamn minds, fam. All in all, Karol Sanchez pulled some real fuckery this week. Frankly, it’s amazing how someone can go from victim to Clown Princess in 24 hours. In any case, it’s time to call Sanchez out for her nonsense, bruh.

Ok, for those who missed it, an Amber Alert went out on Monday for a missing teen girl. Now, based on a video taken in my Bronx borough, it appeared that Sanchez was abducted by four men in front of her mother. At the time, Sanchez’ mother tried to fight off the assailants, to no avail. From there, a citywide search began to find the missing 16-year-old.

Look, for the better part of Tuesday, my social media timelines were filled with posts about Sanchez’ disappearance. Justifiably, people were doing their best to put the word out about this apparent “kidnapping.” Anyway, when Sanchez reappeared on Tuesday evening, everyone was relieved, son. Shit, people were genuinely happy that she was returned to her mother unharmed.

Now, this is where the dumbassery begins, man. *Sigh* Based on new reports, Sanchez pulled a Jussie Smollett on us, fam. Meaning, she faked the entire incident, bruh. The word is, Sanchez’ mother wanted to move back to Honduras. From what I understand, Sanchez wasn’t with the shits and wanted to stay with her 23-year-old Crip boyfriend. So, using her stupid ass teenage logic, she employed the help of four men to “take her by force.” However, there was one crucial flaw in her plan, brethren: WHEN PEOPLE GO MISSING, OTHER PEOPLE TEND TO TRY TO FIND THEM!

Son, did she really think that she would be able to hide what she did? Did she really think that no one would discover her fraudulence? Real talk, she made all of us look like fools, man. Folks were truly concerned about her well-being and she was out here trying to finesse us, fam. On the real, I’m flabbergasted by her gall (word to T.I.). All I can say is, if I were her mother, I would DEFINITELY send her ass back to Honduras after this, bruh.

In the end, I want to reiterate the fact that I hate teenagers. Ultimately, my oldest son is about four years away from the shenanigans. By and by, I’m working out at the UFC Gym twice a week, just to make sure that I can hem his ass up if he ever tried some Karol Sanchez shit. At the end of the day, she did a disserve to REAL missing teens. She did a disserve to the large number of REAL missing women. Keeping it a buck, I don’t even know how to finish this post, son. All I know is, I would be filled with unbridled rage if I were Sanchez’ parent, man. That is all. LC out.

My Random Thoughts After Watching ‘Queen & Slim’

Disclaimer: Spoilers, brethren. Y’all know how this goes.

So, as I promised at the end of my The Irishman post, I finally went to go see Queen & Slim. Real talk, while my wife and I were waiting for our son’s chess tournament to conclude, we dipped away to see the movie. Now, to be transparent, this post is going to be more random (and much longer) than usual, son. Frankly, I have so many sporadic thoughts that I couldn’t put it in a decent narrative, man. All in all, I loved the film and here are some of my takeaways:

  1. Angela “Queen” Johnson annoys the shit out of me at first. On the real, during the first date with Ernest “Slim” Hines, I think she’s unnecessarily rude. Shit, the way my patience is setup, if I were Slim, I would’ve ended that date early, fam. But, as the movie goes on, I realize that her behavior is based on her trauma. She’s guarded but learns that she doesn’t have to be combative and simultaneously isolated all the time.
  2. There are several quotes in the film that resonate with me for different reasons. During a scene after the shooting, while trying to hitchhike, Slim says that he hopes the inhabitants are Black. Queen highlights the fact that this isn’t always a good thing. This ends up being some crazy foreshadowing since a Black man is ultimately the one who sells them out for the $500,000 reward. The phrase “it be your own people” is real as fuck, bruh. Next, when they’re at Uncle Earl‘s house, Queen asks Slim is he’s okay and he says that he is. She asks him how that’s even possible and he says “I guess I’m so used to saying I’m okay even when I’m not.” Son, I feel like that’s the story of my life. Sadly, a lot of us operate like that waaay more than we should, man. It’s okay to not be okay, brethren. Lastly, there’s a scene where Slim asks Queen if she’s a good lawyer. She says that she’s an excellent lawyer and he responds “why do we always have to be excellent? Why can’t we just be ourselves?” Now, I ALWAYS strive for excellence, but I understand where that quote is coming from. Growing up, I was always told that Black people have to work twice as hard as White people to get half as much. So, we end up (unjustly) putting LARGE amounts of pressure on ourselves and our loved ones. We just need to be us and do the best that we can.
  3. I was thoroughly triggered by that initial police stop. Listen, in my 34 years of life, I’ve had NUMEROUS interactions with the cops. The truth is, the vast majority of them weren’t positive, bruh. Hell, just two years ago, I wrote about a tense exchange that I had with four officers who were determined to belittle me. In addition, I lived through Rudy Giuliani and the Michael Bloomberg stop-and-frisk era. Son, I’m a Black man with a college degree and a federal job and I STILL don’t trust the police, man. In my eyes, I’ve seen WAY too much unnecessary aggression to ever release that fear.
  4. I’ve seen some criticism about the film not being “realistic.” However, I think people are missing the point that it’s still a movie and a form of artistic expression. With that being said, I can agree that a Black cop probably wouldn’t just let Queen and Slim drive out of that garage. I can agree that the Black community might not necessarily look at the two of them as pure heroes. But, I do believe that the community would understand their plight. All I can say is, there’s a feeling of hopelessness when it comes to police violence. I mean, there’s NEVER any recourse for us. Our murderers are almost never held accountable for their crimes. In the film, Queen and Slim rightfully defend themselves and I believe that minorities would empathize with their actions/pain.
  5. I’ve also seen criticism about the ending of the film. On one hand, a few people are upset with the way that Queen and Slim die. But, how else did they expect this movie to end? If we’re talking about realistic, there’s NO way that the two of them wouldn’t end up dead or in jail. Regardless of circumstance, a cop killer would be hunted to the ends of the Earth, fam. To me, death was definitely the most likely outcome, bruh. Also, I’ve seen people lament that the film doesn’t give any “answers.” Son, what fucking answers were they expecting? Since when was art designed to answer social issues? Now, I’m not comparing this movie to Do the Right Thing, but there are no answers at the end of Spike Lee‘s film, man. If anything, all of these works are designed to make us feel and think, brethren. No more and no less. From there, it’s up to us to come up with definitive plans of action.
  6. The death of Junior fucked me up, son. Keeping it a buck, this is another scene that I heard complaints about. Like, even my wife was uneasy about this scene juxtaposed with Queen and Slim having sex. Now, I get it, man. I definitely do. It’s a hard 10 minutes to digest, fam. But, I internalized it all in a different way, bruh. The way I see it, Junior’s just a young man who doesn’t know how to process his feelings. He’s enamored by the story of Queen and Slim, but he doesn’t fully understand what it all means and the ramifications. He doesn’t yet understand the nuance of the minority experience in America, but he’s hell-bent on action. This leads to extremely irrational decision-making. The truth is, Queen and Slim don’t want to be heroes. They don’t want to be martyrs. More so than anything, the people around them are elevating their meaning and importance. While Junior is in love with the idea of “immortality,” Slim just wants to be remembered by his family and his lady. From my vantage point, Junior’s death highlights the fact that we need to explain to the youth what’s really going on out here, instead of just leaving them to filter the information on their own.

In the end, I know that I just said a lot, son. Ultimately, there was no easy way for me to write this post, man. By and by, I judge a movie’s quality by how much it stays with me. Truth is, my wife and I have been talking about this film all weekend, fam. So, shout-out to Melina Matsoukas (my Co-op City sister) and Lena Waithe for putting this together, bruh. Side bar, I still don’t like the way that Waithe handled the Jason Mitchell situation, but I give credit where credit is due, folks. Anyway, this movie gave me strong emotional reactions and I thank them for it. At the end of the day, everyone’s entitled to their opinion. All I can say is, I personally loved the movie, brethren. That is all. LC out.