Shut Up, ‘The Punisher’ Is On!

So, I’m going to keep this post short today, son. Listen, The Punisher has finally been released on Netflix and that’s all I care about, man. Basically, watching this show is the only thing on my agenda in the immediate future, fam. Real talk, I’ve been waiting for this series for too long, bruh. All in all, I’m having a hard time keeping my excitement at bay, folks. With that being said, if anyone has my number, don’t call me. I’ll be glued to my TV until I’ve completed every episode.

In the end, there’s nothing else to say here, son. Frank Castle was the best character in Daredevil and it’s about time that Netflix put this show out, man. Keeping it a buck, I’m having a hard time maintaining my focus at work, fam. All I want to do is go home and witness the rampage, bruh. By and by, I guess I can wait a couple of more hours, folks. Ultimately, everyone can reacquaint themselves with the trailer below. Viva la Punisher! LC out.

Advertisements

Kevin Spacey Came Out In The Worst Way Possible

So, I really want to know what kind of world we live in, son. Like, when did coming out as gay make up for pedophilia, man? On the real, that’s the shit that Kevin Spacey just tried to pull, fam. To make matters worse, the media paid more attention to Spacey’s announcement than Anthony Rapp’s original story, bruh. All in all, let’s not confuse one thing for another, folks. When in comes to Rapp, Spacey was nothing more than a predator, people.

Ok, for those who missed it, Anthony Rapp recently alleged some wild shit about Kevin Spacey. Now, during an interview with BuzzFeed News, Rapp talked about an awful encounter with Spacey. Apparently, during their Broadway days, Spacey invited Rapp to his apartment for a party. From there, he put Rapp on a bed, got on top of him and tried to make a move. Keep in mind, Rapp was only 14 years old at the time. Even worse, Spacey was a full grown 26 years old, son. Needless to say, that’s some prime Law & Order: SVU shit, man.

Now, with his name being dragged through the mud, what does Spacey do? Blame his actions on alcohol and proclaim that he’s living his life as a gay man. Bruh… Bruh! That’s now what we’re talking about here, fam! Shit, being gay ain’t got a DAMN thing to do with pushing up on children, bruh! Hell, I love women, but I know good and well that young girls are off limits, son. As a matter of fact, the last time I hit on a 14-year-old, I was 14, man. Well, maybe 15 at the most. Yeah, that’s how this shit works, people.

Moving on, the media made this situation even worse, fam. Look, instead of speaking about Spacey’s predatorial behavior, they talked about him “coming out.” Son, how badly can people miss the damn point, man?! And now, more people are making claims against the actor. Frankly, I can’t even keep up with all of the fuckery, bruh. With that being said, folks can look up his treachery for themselves, son.

In the end, I can’t even blame Netflix for killing House of Cards, man. Ultimately, they can’t have their star actor making terrible excuses for sexual assault, fam. By and by, the amount of abuse that appears to be going on in Hollywood is staggering, bruh. It seems like all these people do is stand in front of a camera and then try to rape someone. *Sigh* My head hurts, folks. I can’t do this anymore. LC out.

I Can’t Wait For ‘The Punisher’!

So, I’m going to keep this short today, son. All I can say is, I can’t WAIT for this The Punisher show on Netflix, man! As a lifelong comic book fan, Frank Castle has always been one of my favorite characters. I mean, we all love a good superpower, but ain’t nothing like an ordinary human being doing some extraordinary shit, fam. Shit, that’s exactly why Batman is my favorite hero of all time. In any case, after the way Netflix and Jon Bernthal brought Punisher to life on Daredevil, I’m super hyped for this new show, bruh!

Now, I could take the time to explain to everyone who Punisher is, but that’s what Google is for, son. Instead, I’d much rather just let the trailer speak for itself, man. With that being said, check out the trailer for the upcoming show below. As of now, I don’t know when the show starts, but when it does, I shall be there, fam! In the end, long live Marvel, bruh! That is all. LC out.

Amy Schumer Ain’t Even Funny, Though

Ok, before I begin, let me make one thing clear: women should be paid the same as men. I mean, it’s only right that women receive equal pay for equal work, son. Now, despite that fact, people are BUGGING if they think that Amy Schumer deserves the same payday as Dave Chappelle and Chris Rock. All I know is, Schumer isn’t comparable to them and it has NOTHING to do with gender, man.

So, for those who missed it, word came down that Schumer renegotiated her contract with Netflix. This apparently came about after she discovered what Chappelle and Rock were paid for their respective stand-up specials. Look, I’m all for everyone getting their money, but the idea that Schumer is on the same level as those two legends is laughable at best. Now, when I say laughable, that’s definitely in STARK contrast to Schumer’s comedy. See, she’s just not funny, fam. Like, at all, bruh. Listen, it isn’t hyperbole when I say I’ve NEVER laughed at one of her jokes, son. Shit, I’m just being honest, man.

Now, if we take my bias out of the question, let’s just look at some facts here. Chappelle’s recent specials served as a return to form for the comedic hero. After YEARS away from the scene, his two Netflix specials were presented as his return to the limelight. All in all, why on Earth would Schumer be paid the same as him? Fam, she has NEVER shifted culture the way Chappelle or Rock have! Simply put, she’s never been in the same stratosphere as them.

Keeping it a buck, equal pay is definitely a real issue in our society. However; I don’t think this Schumer situation is an example of that. Bruh, she can’t be mentioned in the same breath as Chappelle or Rock, and it has nothing to do with her being a woman. Frankly, she hasn’t put in enough work to be considered amongst their ranks. In my eyes, paying her the same as them would be a disservice to Chappelle’s and Rock’s respective legacies. Simply put, they’ve been doing this A LOT longer (and A LOT better) than she has.

In the end, I hate when people inject social issues into irrelevant circumstances. Ultimately, Schumer’s situation isn’t an equal pay issue, man. By and by, her body of work just doesn’t stack up to theirs. Hell, she even admitted as much, son. Listen, facts are facts, fam. It just is what it is, bruh. LC out.

Luke Cage Drinks White People’s Tears

White people just need to be a part of everything, huh? It’s mind-boggling how our Caucasian counterparts can watch a show about a Black man in Harlem and be upset about the lack of White representation. Now, the last time I checked, Harlem wasn’t Greenwich, Connecticut. However; I refuse to go down this path. I’m not going to spend my time debating such a stupid argument. Instead, I’m going to propose a trade. On behalf of the Black Delegation, we’ll make future episodes of Luke Cage “more White” if the following things happen:

1. Friends returns with more Black people in its cast.

2. Seinfeld returns with more Black people in its cast.

3. The Wonder Years returns with more Black people in its cast.

4. Gilligan’s Island returns with more Black people in its cast.

Ok, wait, let me stop for a second. Does everyone see where I’m going with this? Literally EVERY television show or movie features a predominantly White cast. Hell, why the fuck do dumbasses think Black people were so angry about the Academy Awards last year? Did we already forget the #OscarsSoWhite movement? All we do is beg for representation, man. Instead, we get idiots like Tim Burton explaining why diversity isn’t important in his movies. So, White people get to be the stars of damn near ALL of our entertainment and they STILL want to commandeer ours too. Man, the fuckery is so strong, I don’t even know how to put it into words.

With all of that being said, let me backtrack for a second. No, we will NOT add more White people to Luke Cage just to make the Butt Hurt Federation happy. For once, we’re telling stories about OUR lives, and news flash, White people aren’t always a part of it. On the real, if this is what people think “reverse racism” is, they literally have no clue about regular racism. Black people have to deal with institutional bias, profiling and brutality, while fools complain about not being shown at the same deli as Luke. Is this a fucking joke, son? Like, this can’t be real life.

All in all, if any White person is mad about Luke Cage, then I’m happy. On the real, anyone that falls into that category needs to grow the fuck up. Black people don’t watch shows set in Nebraska and wonder why we’re under-represented. This is Harlem, bitch! Hold this L. Good day.

P.S. Simone Missick, the woman who plays Misty Knight on the show, is fine as FUCK, son! Now, that has absolutely nothing to do with the subject of this post, but I had to say it anyway.

P.P.S. Shout-out to my dude Brent for inspiring this post. I tried to avoid the tomfoolery, but I do take good advice when it’s given to me. That is all.

I Wish All Black People Were Luke Cage

So, today’s post may be a little bit weird. This is mainly because it combines two things I have a deep love for: Black lives and comic books. First, I must say, I’m super hyped about the Luke Cage show that’s about to hit Netflix on Friday. I’d be a bozo if I wasn’t excited about a Black superhero getting his own platform. With that being said, based on all of the racial injustice happening in America right now, Cage has taken on a new meaning for me. Ultimately, I guess I just wish all Black people had Luke Cage’s abilities. This way, maybe we’d actually be able to survive in this country.

Now, for those unfamiliar with Luke Cage, let me provide a quick backstory. So, Cage grew up in New York City, got involved with gang life, but ultimately decided he wanted something better. A hating ass friend thought Cage stole his girl, so he planted drugs on Cage, which landed the future hero in prison. From there, Cage was experimented on by a research scientist and turned into a superhuman with incomparable strength and unbreakable skin. Moving on, once Cage got out of prison, he decided to clean up the streets of NYC and crack a ton of heads in the process.

Ok, since I’ve gotten his background out of the way, I want everyone to pay close attention to two particular words from the last paragraph: unbreakable skin. In the comics, whole mobs of people tried shooting Cage and he didn’t even flinch. While I’ve followed this character since I was a child, that particular ability took on a new meaning for me in 2016. Can anyone imagine how amazing it would be if bullets just bounced off of Black people? If we didn’t have to fear dying during a traffic stop? If we didn’t have to fear dying if our cars broke down? If we didn’t have to fear getting shot while just doing our jobs? I’m well aware of the fact that fantasy doesn’t help us in these times, but damn, let a man dream for a second, son. I’ll come back to reality in a moment.

In the end, I’m not even sure why I wrote this. However; I was briefly comforted during the ten minutes it took me to jot all of this down. Now, let me get back to explaining to my two sons that while people think they’re cute now, they’ll be seen as a threat when they get older. Good day.

P.S. I also have to say rest in peace to Alfred Olango, an unarmed and mentally ill man who was killed by police in San Diego. This is just another example of why people like me constantly fear for our lives.