Get Ray Lewis The F*ck Outta Here!

Man, I have so many simultaneous thoughts in my head, I don’t even know where to start, son. Look, Ray Lewis needs to shut the fuckity-fuck up, fam! Listen, I’m pretty sure that Colin Kaepernick isn’t looking to him for advice, bruh. In addition, I TRULY don’t like the idea of a Black man telling another Black man to be low key about activism. On the real, that’s just another way of saying “play nice and don’t publicly piss off White people.” All in all, fuck all of that, man!

Now, for anyone who missed it, Lewis took it upon himself to show Kaepernick “the way.” According to Lewis, if Kaepernick wants to find another job in the NFL, he needs to be quieter about social injustice. Apparently, standing up for what’s right pales in comparison to not upsetting the owners. By and by, Kaepernick needs to be a “good boy” if he wants to secure a spot on another team.

Real talk, that seems to be a common theme amongst Kaepernick’s Black detractors. Basically, if he stopped making White people uncomfortable, then they’d let him throw the football around again. I mean, this is the same shit I roasted Michael Vick for. We’re so programmed as a community, that instead of championing Kaepernick for standing up for US, we’d rather tell him to be more presentable to the White majority. *Sigh* As Malcolm X once said, “who taught you to hate yourself?” Clearly, we already know the answer to that, son.

Moving on, outside of the ridiculous message, I also have a problem with the source, son. Keeping it a buck, Lewis is the LAST human being who should be giving ANYONE pointers, man! Lest we forget, his white suit was never found after Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar were stabbed to death. Lest we forget, he snitched on Reginald Oakley and Joseph Sweeting to get his murder charges dismissed. Shit, Kaepernick is being judged for taking a knee during the fucking National Anthem, fam. All I know is, Lewis isn’t some beacon of purity, bruh.

In the end, I’m tired of Black people worrying more about our image than our rights. Instead of addressing the issues that Kaepernick is highlighting, folks would rather tell him to pipe down and just play football. Ultimately, the joke is on us as we continue to be mistreated and killed by systemic violence. Then again, maybe Lewis empathizes because he’s also gotten away with murder. Shit, just some food for thought, people. LC out.

P.S. The entire “shut the fuck up” mantra of this post also applies to Kordell Stewart. Seriously, no one wants this dude’s opinion, fam. On the real, all I want from “Slash” is Porsha Williams‘ phone number. Hook that up, bruh. That is all.

Get Michael Vick The F*ck Outta Here!

Man, let’s just get straight to the point here. Michael Vick is the LAST human being who should be advising Colin Kaepernick on ANYTHING, son. Like, this dude can’t be fucking serious, man! Now, maybe Vick is trying to play nice since a dark cloud has followed his entire NFL career. However; the mere suggestion that a haircut would improve Kaepernick’s standing shows that he’s an unadulterated clown. Fam, someone please get Michael Vick the fuck outta here!

So, the tomfoolery began when Vick appeared on Fox Sports 1‘s Speak for Yourself show. When the discussion turned to how Kaepernick could get another job in the league, Vick said the following:

The first thing we got to get Colin to do is cut his hair. I don’t think he should represent himself in that way in terms of the hairstyle. Just go clean cut. Why not? Perception and image is everything. I love the guy to death, but I want him to succeed in and off the field, and this has to be a start for him.”

Wait, what? Huh? How exactly is he representing himself, Vick? Last time I checked, that’s how hair grows out of a Black person’s scalp. So, is he insinuating that there’s something wrong with the natural state of his hair? Ohhhh, I get it! “Clean cut” is just another way of saying “acceptable for White people.” Yeah, I see what Vick is doing here. Basically, if Kaepernick wants another shot at football, he needs to appease the owners and the coaches. The same individuals who don’t understand his cause in the first place. Shit, fantastic advice, Vick!

To be clear, Kaepernick’s current status isn’t about his ability. Now, is he an elite quarterback? No. But, can someone honestly say that out of the 100+ total QB roles in the league, he can’t lock down ONE roster spot? Man, give me a fucking break, son! This man has played in a Super Bowl, fam! I don’t buy that line of reasoning at all, man.

The fact of the matter is, the powers that be hate what he stands for and don’t want to deal with him. Plain and simple, bruh. Hell, one NFL executive compared Kaepernick to Rae Carruth, a former player who MURDERED A WOMAN! Somehow, kneeling for the National Anthem is equivalent to homicide, man. With that being said, Vick’s comments are completely rooted in racial conditioning. He’s conditioned to think that Black people need to behave in a certain way to be welcomed by White people. By and by, fuck ALL of that, son!

In the end, Michael Vick has some nerve, fam. Frankly, ever since his dog fighting scandal, White people have hated him everywhere he went. Ultimately, the Black community has been the entity who has continued to champion him. In my eyes, he’s spitting in our faces by taking this stance. All in all, I hope he eventually learns the gravity of his fuckery. LC out.

P.S. Kaepernick is righteously petty for tweeting the definition of Stockholm syndrome. In the spirit of Bruce Lee, that’s the art of fighting without fighting. That is all.

Stop Telling Black People When To Protest!

Honestly, there’s really no need to mince words here, son. I truly, truly hate when people tell Black people when it’s appropriate to protest. For this particular post, I’ m not even talking about the individuals who think we don’t have a right to protest at all. Nah, this time around, I’m speaking to the condescending fools who believe they have the moral authority to tell us when/what we have the right to feel. In my eyes, these folks can take their opinions and shove it.

First, I’d like to thank Kate Upton for inspiring this post. While she isn’t the first idiot to express this sentiment, she’s the one I’m going to use to destroy this faulty logic. After Colin Kaepernick took his stand, excuse me his sit, excuse me his kneel, against police brutality and racial injustice, more athletes have started to follow suit. However; according to Upton, while we have the “right” to protest, for the “120 seconds” during the national anthem, we should basically shut up and respect the flag/military. Now, pardon me, but since when does a model, or anyone for that matter, decide when minorities should be upset about our treatment in this country? Even though I’ve already spoken about this in a previous post, I think we need to delve deeper into why bringing up the military is ridiculous when talking about our protest methods.

Now, before I continue, let me start my thesis with the national anthem itself. The Star-Spangled Banner was written by a man named Francis Scott Key. Now, if anyone does their Google’s, they’ll notice that Key was not only a slave owner, but an active anti-abolitionist. So, for the dummies out there, the man who wrote the song their telling us to respect actually enslaved our ancestors. HE ENSLAVED OUR ANCESTORS, MAN! Why on Earth should we respect a song that was written by someone who literally fought against our freedom? That’s bar none the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life, man. Basically, when he penned the words “land of the free and the home of the brave,” he DEFINITELY wasn’t talking about us, son. I think it’s truly amazing how everyone is told to “never forget” certain historical atrocities, but others that don’t fit a particular agenda or narrative are completely glossed over. Miss me with all of that bullshit, son. THIS is American history too, bitch! Own it!

Moving on, let’s talk about this “respect for the military” everyone loves to bring up. For just one second, can we stop pretending like the military is beyond reproach? Now, if anyone thinks I’m crossing the line with that statement, I’d suggest looking up the “mustard gas experiments” of World War II. That’s right, son, minorities were used as guinea pigs to determine the effects of mustard gas on intended targets. So, even in our service of this God-forsaken country, we’re treated like subhuman, second-class citizens. With that being said, don’t talk to me about what people have done for our freedom. In addition, if all of these naysayers care so much about the troops, why don’t they do more to help veterans suffering from physical disabilities, mental health issues and poverty? If singing the anthem is a detractor’s only show of support, they might as well sit down and shut the fuck of the highest shut the fucks up.

In the end, the fact of the matter is, people don’t want us to protest at all. When we march, we’re judged. When we speak, we’re judged. When we write, we’re judged. When we sit, we’re judged. There’s literally nothing we can do that’s acceptable in the eyes of our oppressors. But guess what, losers? We’re not going to stop demonstrating just because it makes certain people uncomfortable. For anyone who feels uneasy, good. This is only the beginning, man. There’s a movement happening here and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it. Good day. No, GREAT day.

The Argument Against Colin Kaepernick

Man, oh man, what has Colin Kaepernick gotten himself into, son? Who would’ve thought the act of sitting down would get a man in so much trouble? After not standing for the National Anthem during a preseason game this past Friday, Kaepernick unleashed the ire of damn near everyone with a platform to speak. While people are allowed to have their opinions, I can’t help but be confused by the stance some individuals have taken. Sooooooo, since I also have my own platform to speak, I’m here to debunk some of the half-baked arguments against Colin Kaepernick.

Now, let me begin by saying, there’s no such thing as someone who’s “too rich” to acknowledge social and racial injustice. That seems to be a prevalent argument circulating around in response to Kaepernick’s actions. Apparently, when a person is not living in poverty and despair, they’re not allowed to talk about anything real. So, to be clear, is money supposed to be the great equalizer? If a small fraction of a particular racial group is afforded the opportunity to join the “one percent,” are they no longer allowed to shed light on prejudice? Are they no longer allowed to have a dialogue about the issues facing people who look like them? Ok, wait, I get it now, son. The minute a miniscule portion of a community “makes it,” all of the ills facing everyone else magically dissipates. It all makes sense now, bruh. Look, I might, MIGHT, give someone a slight pass for questioning the timing of Kaepernick’s move. However; simply dismissing his ideals because of his tax bracket is beyond fucking stupid, bro. Stop the foolishness, man.

Next, there’s another argument being made that Kaepernick needs to respect the flag because of our troops. Now, to be fair, I have nothing but respect for any individual who puts their life on the line for our country. Frankly, our soldiers display a level of bravery the average person simply doesn’t exhibit. However; fighting for our country and racial injustice are mutually exclusive, man. Why is it so difficult for some to even remotely open their eyes to the troubling history of America? Newsflash, dummies: there were still troops when Black people weren’t allowed to vote. There were still troops when we were considered three-fifths of a person. There were still troops during the Jim Crow era. Just because these men and women fight for this country’s ideals does NOT mean Black people aren’t allowed to bring up the ugly truth of how this land has historically treated us. Since the age of the Founding Fathers, the military and racism have both resided on the same land. It is what it is, son. DEAL with it. That’s truly the only way to make the argument go away.

All in all, I don’t actually have the time to address all of the ridiculous theories regarding Kaepernick. I just wanted to highlight a couple I thought were particularly preposterous. Look, regardless of his current stature as a player, he has every right to take a stand, if he so desires. While some fools think it’s a bright idea to burn his jersey now, I guarantee if he threw four touchdowns next game, these “fans” would forget all about this. So, to me, all of his detractors can shut the flying fuckity-fuck up. The fact that people are more up in arms about his bench protest than the issues he’s bringing attention to says everything. Situations like this prove we’ll probably never have the “open dialogue” about race pundits love to talk about. No one really wants to hash these ideas out, man. Everyone wants to continue to embrace the status quo. That is all. That is all, son. Good day.

P.S. Really, Jerry Rice? Really?! You’re really going to take the “All Lives Matterapproach against Kaepernick? Honestly, I’m not even going to list the amount of ways you’re an idiot, man. I’ve already addressed people like you in my “Money Can’t Buy ‘Woke’” post. Go sit down somewhere and be silent, man. If your conversation ain’t about a slant route or a hitch pattern, I don’t want to hear it, son. Hush.

A Letter To Gabby Douglas


Dear Gabby Douglas,

While you may not know me, I wanted to take this time to write to you directly. During this crucial time in your life, I’m positive you have loved ones who are reassuring you that everything will be alright. With that being said, my words may not matter much at all. In any case, I still feel compelled to reach out to you. Despite all of the mean-spirited attacks being levied your way, I simply want to deliver one message to you: fuck the haters.

As sad as it is, we live in a society where people love being outraged and love tearing others down. Losers feed off of the emotions of the individuals around them, as if causing another human being pain adds value to their lives. This concept is one of the main problems with social media. Cowards who wouldn’t have the balls to utter such ugliness to their intended target in person just hide behind their computer screens and smartphones. They’d much rather feel powerful in the comments section of a website while wondering why they have no friends.

For me, the worst part about this entire situation is the fact you’ve been getting knocked down by people who look like you, in addition to all of the others. It’s absolutely disgusting that Black people can see you compete on the highest level of your sport and only think to comment on your hair. The self-hate is so visible when some misguided fools can criticize the way your hair grows NATURALLY out of your head. Do they believe their hair behaves any differently? Malcolm X asked the following question decades ago: who taught you to hate yourself? That’s a question your Black detractors need to ask themselves at this particular moment.

It’s also incredibly disheartening to see so many White people question your patriotism. Whether they’re attacking you for not putting your hand on your heart during the national anthem or not “cheering” for your teammates enough, the lack of empathy is ridiculous. Have they never been disappointed before? I know the results of a couple of Olympic events didn’t go the way you planned them, so I completely understand being upset by the outcome. When you want something so bad and don’t achieve it, the pain is very real and hard to hide. Do NOT feel bad for being human. You have every right to be emotional during these times, naysayers be damned. I wonder how any of your critics would feel if they were in a similar position. Would they feel chipper if they saw the intended finish line and didn’t cross it in the way they envisioned? It’s incredibly easy to be critical of someone else when that individual has nothing at stake.

In the end, all I can say is, you’ve represented this country to the best of your ability. If anyone out there can’t accept that, they didn’t deserve to have you on their side in the first place. Also, while you may be too proper to say things as plainly as you should, I do not have that problem. Soooooo, fuck any and everybody who has something malicious to say about you. I guarantee they haven’t done shit with their lives anyway. In any case, keep your head up and keep pushing, Gabby.

Sincerely,

Your friendly neighborhood LC