We All Knew That Donald Trump Would Be Acquitted

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, Donald Trump‘s impeachment trial led to an impasse between my wife and I. To be clear, we both agree that this dude is guilty as shit. However, she wanted to keep our TV glued to the news and I wanted nothing to do with the constant coverage. Why? Because we all knew how this story would end, man. Real talk, we ALL understood that the Senate would acquit him. With that being said, why is anyone acting surprised, fam?

Ok, for those who haven’t been paying attention to our future, Trump’s impeachment trial just came to its logical conclusion. Now, despite the fact that the entire Ukraine situation was hilariously inappropriate, I never believed that Trump would be convicted of anything. I mean, let’s keep it a buck, bruh. The Republicans have the majority vote in the Senate, son. So, why would they break rank and actually oust Trump? Like, through three years of Trump’s presidency, when has the GOP EVER stood up to him? Fam, we couldn’t even get most of them to admit that Trump’s “very fine people on both sides” line from Charlottesville was a bad fucking idea. In any case, there was NO way that the Democrats could secure 67 votes for a conviction, man.

Moving on, when it came to the two articles of impeachment, the vote was damn near unanimous along party lines. Look, when it came to the obstruction of Congress charge, the vote was 53-47, with neither party breaking rank. When it came to the abuse of power charge, the vote was 52-48, with Mitt Romney being the sole Republican to vote against Trump. Needless to say, his party is LIVID with him right now. Shit, how dare he make a logical decision when he’s supposed to remain blindly loyal to his party, bruh? All in all, I didn’t pay much attention to this process because I already knew how it would end, son. So, I simply never understood the point of all of this, man.

In the end, the Democrats just gave Trump a gift, fam. Ultimately, President Orange is going to use this acquittal as a talking point on the campaign trail. By and by, he’s going to claim “vindication,” despite the fact that the deciding body is mostly comprised of his constituents. All I know is, this impeachment was an ill-advised move from the beginning, bruh. On top of that, all of the Democratic hopefuls for president suck, son. So, I hope everyone is ready for four more years of Trump, man. At the end of the day, I’ve got my passport ready, brethren. Hell, it might be time to bounce up outta this bitch, folks. That is all. LC out.

Donald Trump Chose Sexual Assault Over Liberalism

Now, before I begin, let me make one thing clear: this post isn’t about political allegiance, son. Frankly, I don’t give a fuck if someone is liberal or conservative, man. On the real, everyone has the right to believe whatever they believe, fam. However; political idealism should NEVER spit in the face of basic human decency, bruh. With that being said, what Donald Trump is doing right now is disgusting, folks. All in all, I don’t give a shit what political party he belongs to. Backing Roy Moore in any capacity is just wrong, people!

So, how did we get here? Let’s recap, son. Basically, the Alabama-based Roy Moore is running for a Senate seat. In actuality, he’s running for the seat that was vacated by Jeff Sessions when he became the Attorney General. Along the way, nine women have come out and alleged that Moore made numerous unwanted sexual advances. Even worse, damn near all of these women alleged that the situations occurred when they were teenagers. By and by, when the alleged assaults took place, the women were between 14 and 22 years old. Now, this essentially means that Roy Moore is a pedophile, man!

As expected, most of the GOP has distanced itself from Moore. Prominent Republicans like Mitch McConnell, John McCain and Mitt Romney have called for Moore to drop out of the Senate race. Side note, I truly believe that a lot of these Republicans are only taking this step because they want Luther Strange instead. Real talk, that was their preferred pick in the first place, fam. All I know is, if that’s their only motivation for doing the right thing, then I’m thoroughly repulsed, bruh. In any case, no one is on Moore’s side, folks. Well, except Trump and Steve Bannon.

Look, this clown Trump really came to Moore’s defense, son. In his mind, since Moore said the allegations are false, then they must be false, man. In addition, Trump stated that the Senate doesn’t need a liberal in there. That was literally his only critique of Doug Jones, the Democratic candidate. So, let me get this straight, fam. A pedophile is better than a liberal? Has bipartisanship really gotten this skewed, bruh?! Good fucking Lord, folks! Our entire political system has jumped the shark! We’ve actually reached a point where political allegiance is stronger than our need to stop sexual predators! I… I have no words!

In the end, Trump reminds me daily that we’re fucked as a nation. Like, we absolutely fucked, son! Keeping it a buck, if Moore actually secures that Senate seat, then we might have to burn down the country and start over. Seriously, our politicians can’t be this far gone, man! Listen, my brain truly can’t handle the fuckery, fam! I… *Sigh* I’ve got nothing else, bruh. LC out.

Donald Trump’s Guide To Getting Women

Now, let’s be real for a second, son. Of COURSE I’m talking about Donald Trump today. I mean, did anybody really think I was going to let his latest batch of tomfoolery slide? On the real, how can anyone who breathes air endorse this guy? How can anyone who breathes air BE this guy?! Every time I think it’s impossible to top the copious amounts of insanity he’s said, some new shit comes out. With that being said, let’s talk about Trump’s most recent philosophies about women.

Look, to start, I’m not going to spend too much time on last night’s debate. It was exactly what I thought it would be: a pure shitshow. Instead of being on the defensive, Trump came out swinging, launching a bunch of accusations at not only Hillary Clinton, but Bill Clinton as well. Even before the debate, Trump held a press conference with four women who claimed to either be sexually assaulted by the former president or wronged by Hillary. In any case, the debate devolved into one of the ugliest spectacles I’ve ever seen, which is exactly what Trump and company wanted.

So, why was Trump so desperate to create a distraction? Because of a video that surfaced over the weekend of an outrageous conversation he had with Billy Bush in 2005. While on the set of “Access Hollywood,” Trump was recorded speaking about how he approaches attractive women. Apparently, in his world, it’s perfectly ok to “just start kissing” women and “[grabbing] them by the pussy.” To him, these are appropriate actions because celebrities can essentially do whatever they want. Now, I don’t have to speculate about his mentality because he literally said “when you’re a star… you can do anything.” That’s actually a statement that came out of his mouth, son. Honestly, “flabbergasted” isn’t even a strong enough word to describe my reaction, man.

Now, as expected, all of the people who heard these remarks were as taken aback as I was. The outrage even extended to Trump’s own party. So far, he’s been condemned by Paul Ryan, Reince Priebus, Mitt Romney, John McCain, Jeb Bush and myriad of GOP faithful who were appalled by Trump’s words. In addition, a number of Republicans have even demanded that Trump drop out of the presidential race. However; we all know Trump would never do that. Quitting has never been the man’s style.

Moving on, according to him and his campaign, his comments were nothing more than “locker room talk.” Apparently, this is the way men talk behind closed doors. Come the fuck on, son! Last time I checked, I’ve been a man my entire life and I’ve NEVER participated in a conversation like this! When it comes to the men I know, we talk about what we would do if we had the opportunity to get down with a chick. But we NEVER endorse sexual assault, man! Nowhere in Trump’s statements did he speak about consent. In actuality, he said he does things because he knows he can get away with them. Bruh, that’s textbook rape. At this point, anyone who disagrees is advocating violence against women. Plain and simple. On the real, the same men who consider this “locker room talk” are probably the same men who sympathize with Brock Turner, Austin Wilkerson and David Becker.

In the end, the scariest part of this is, after last night’s debate, Trump’s constituents will probably still continue to support him. Based on some early reviews of his performance, he’s been getting positive feedback for seemingly pushing Hillary against the ropes. All of this proves that morals are an obsolete idea. Party unity is more important to everyone than having an actual belief system. With that being said, voting is still vital. I know I’ve said that a number of times on this site, but I can’t stress this enough, man. This November‘s election is of the utmost importance. Everyone needs to use their voice. Good day.

P.S. Does anyone else find it sexist that Bill’s alleged misconduct is always brought up to smite Hillary? SHE’S the one running for president right now, not Bill! If the jabs have nothing to do with her directly, keep them out of this race. She shouldn’t have to suffer for what her husband may or may not have done. That is all.