Don’t Ruin This, Canelo!

Dammit, Canelo Álvarez! Say it ain’t so, son! Please tell me that Canelo isn’t just another juicer, man! All I know is, his positive drug test better NOT ruin the rematch between him and Gennady Golovkin! Real talk, boxing fans have been waiting for this matchup, fam. With that being said, we need to get to the bottom of this potential scandal ASAP!

Ok, for those who missed it, Canelo just popped hot for a performance-enhancing drug. Apparently, he tested positive for clenbuterol. Now, historically, this substance has been used as a weight-loss drug for bodybuilders and an enhancer for other athletes. Anyway, in response to his positive test, Canelo blamed contaminated Mexican meat. Listen, that may sound like a bunch of bullshit, but he may have a case, bruh. As a matter of fact, back in 2011, the Mexican national football team was also busted for clenbuterol. But, they were later acquitted after the World Anti-Doping Agency determined that the positive tests were caused by bad food.

Now, the problem is, there’s also a history of boxers using this substance fraudulently. For example, Érik Morales, Lucas Browne and Francisco Vargas all served suspensions for clenbuterol use. So, it’s a little hard for me to automatically believe Canelo’s story, son. In my eyes, him using drugs makes sense. I mean, he’s facing GGG, one of the hardest-hitting middleweights in history. Real talk, Canelo doesn’t want to get put on his ass. From that standpoint, he was probably looking for an extra boost, man. Either way, I still want to see this fight, fam.

In the end, Canelo better prove his case, bruh. Ultimately, if this fight gets cancelled, I may have to fight someone myself, son. By and by, I’m getting sick of all of these drug scandals in combat sports. At the end of the day, this nonsense always seems to delay/cancel the fights we want to see. *Sigh* Let’s just get to the boxing, folks! That is all. LC out.


Can We Finally Talk About Homegrown Terrorists?

Now, before I say anything else, I’d like to give my regards to the families who were affected by the recent terror attack in London, England. No matter how many times these travesties happen, it’s always incredibly sad to watch. With that being said, there’s a conversation that needs to be had, man. Can we finally talk about homegrown terrorists? I mean, if we really looked at the most egregious attacks in recent years, they’ve all been perpetrated by citizens. At some point, we need to stop politicizing everything and speak on the real issues. Our own people are being radicalized and it’s destroying our respective nations.

So, when it comes to Wednesday’s incident, the horrific deed was carried out by Khalid Masood. As a recap, Masood got in his car, drove on the pavement and started running down pedestrians. Ultimately, he killed four people and injured fifty more. Now, it’s notable that Masood was born as Adrian Russell Elms in Dartford, Kent. Meaning, he was a product of the same land he just terrorized. Somewhere along the line, he got radicalized by ISIS and carried out a heinous act of violence. Apparently, even though he had a criminal record, he wasn’t under any investigation for this type of behavior.

Moving on, Masood’s act continues a dangerous trend that seems to be flying under the radar. A large number of the most despicable acts against people are being committed by natives. I mean, let’s go down the line, man. Dylann Roof, the Charleston church shooter, was born in South Carolina. Rizwan Farook, the San Bernardino shooter, was born in Illinois. Omar Mateen, the Orlando nightclub shooter, was born in New York. Alexandre Bissonnette, the Quebec mosque shooter, was French Canadian. Does anyone else see the pattern here? In all seriousness, the most vicious attacks in recent years were all committed by citizens. So, if that’s the case, why the fuck are we always talking about travel bans and border walls?!

Look, if people like Donald Trump really want to keep America safe, then we need to address our homegrown killers. On the real, a wall along the Mexican border and a Muslim Ban wouldn’t have prevented ANY of these incidents, man. So, how will they make any of us safer? I mean, it’s common fucking sense, son. We need to figure out why so many citizens are turning their backs on their countries and becoming radicals. If not, none of these ridiculous preventative measures will have any type of effect. Shit, more people will die and all we’ll do is argue about the root cause in the media. Ultimately, nothing will get accomplished, man.

In the end, these are scary times, son. The problem is, if we don’t come up with real solutions now, the times will only get scarier. Now, instead of focusing so much on what other countries are doing, can we pay attention to our own people? Ok, thanks. LC out.

The Muslim Ban: An Official Rebuke Of The First Amendment

*Sigh* No lie, I’ve been trying to find a way to articulate myself all weekend. We’re literally watching the destruction of America right before our very eyes. Now, if anyone wants to read our country’s First Amendment, they’ll notice that the first thing the bill guarantees is freedom of religion. With one stroke of his pen, Donald Trump has egregiously violated our Constitution. On the real, based on Trump’s first ten days in office, I’m thoroughly convinced we’re on the verge of both World War III and Civil War II.

At this point, if anyone reading this is unaware of Trump’s Muslim Ban executive order, then… Google, son. Like, being in the dark on this issue is unacceptable. Trump essentially banned the entry of citizens from Syria, Iran, Sudan, Libya, Somalia, Yemen and Iraq. This is part of the “extreme vetting” that Trump constantly spoke about during his campaign run. According to his logic, this is to protect us from potential terrorist attacks. However; if that’s really the case, why aren’t Saudi Arabia, Afghanistan and Egypt on this list? Last time I checked, terrorists from these countries have actually attacked us. Has anyone heard of a little event called 9/11?

Look, I’m not naive and I’m fully away of the fact that ISIS has footing in some of the countries listed in the ban. However; here’s something to consider: Islamic radicals are killing mass amounts of their own people in these countries! That’s why countless innocent families are trying to flee and seek solace. Even outside of these refugees, green card holders and valid visa carriers were also being detained at airports. That’s right, son. People who had the LEGAL RIGHT to enter our country were being held up at numerous airports across the nation. Needless to say, the American public has had enough of the fuck shit and have taken to the streets to protest.

Now, here’s where Trump’s hypocrisy takes center stage. He claims that the ban isn’t based on religion, but his executive order gives preference to Christian refugees. Good fucking Lord, man! We’re watching an administration vehemently lie to our faces and then pretend like we don’t see the bullshit. This entire episode is one of the most deplorable violations of democracy I’ve ever seen. Like, I’m having a very hard time putting all of this into words, man. Our rights are being trampled on for the entire world to see, son.

As a response, Iran has already made strides to block U.S. visitors. Does everyone see what’s happening here? We’re very rapidly entering into a zone that can have very dangerous ramifications. Thanks to Trump, we’re already on bad terms with NATO and the United Nations. If we stay on this trajectory, we could end up in a military conflict with no allies to back us. So far, we’ve pissed off Europe, our Hispanic neighbors to the South and our Canadian neighbors to the North. If we add public unrest to that equation, we truly have the ingredients for another World War AND another Civil War.

All in all, to all of my Muslim brothers and sisters out there: your religion is not a crime. Donald Trump does NOT speak for the people and we categorically condemn everything he stands for. All jokes aside, the revolution is now and everyone needs to decide what side they’re on. All I know is, these despicable acts of injustice CANNOT continue. LC out.

I’m Not Paying For A Wall

I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’m not paying for a wall. I’M NOT PAYING FOR A WALL! I’M NOT PAYING FOR A WALL!!!

Do these GOP assholes understand what I’m saying right now? The American people have no fucking business paying for Donald Trump‘s imaginary wall along the Mexican border. Look, everything about this wall is ridiculous, son. First, it’s inherently racist. Republicans have painted Mexicans as nothing but a group of rapists and criminals who are here to take everyone’s jobs. Despite the fact that there is no evidence to support this widespread belief, this type of rhetoric has been used to dupe gullible Americans. Now, Congress is trying to make the citizens foot the bill for Trump’s passion project.

Now, every facet of this wall has been problematic from the beginning. During his presidential campaign, Trump constantly said that Mexico would pay for the wall’s construction. With that being said, the Mexican government has made it abundantly clear that no such thing will happen. So, if Mexico basically told us to go fuck ourselves, then who will be responsible for ponying up the money? All I know is, it damn sure won’t be me, son.

Keeping it a buck, my resolve is now even stronger after watching a press conference with Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan. These fools really said this wall is going to cost between $12 billion and $15 billion. Bruh, what? What?! How many billions of dollars?! Man, get these Ronald McDonald-ass clowns the fuck outta here, son! On the real, unless we go to war with Mexico, there’s no way we can make them pay for this tomfoolery. All in all, not one red cent of my tax money better help fund this bullshit, man!

Ultimately, I want the GOP to take their Secure Fence Act and shove it up their asses, bruh. If they want to be bigots against an entire group of people, then tell them to use their own bread, son. I mean, they have more money than all of us anyway. *Sigh* I’m going to go find some bourbon, man. LC out.

Thank You, America

Thank you, America. Thank you for hating Hispanics. Thank you for hating Muslims. Thank you for hating Black people. Thank you for hating women. Thank you for hating the LGBTQ community. Thank you for hating disabled people. Thank you for hating every group of individuals Donald Trump has shitted on over the course of this election. America, you have emphatically shown us what type of despicable country you are and what you actually value: bigotry across all platforms. Bravo, America! Fucking bravo!

At this point, I could write two sentences or I could write an entire dissertation. I’m truly fucking confused by what happened last night. People, please tell me I’m dreaming. Please tell me Trump isn’t really the next president of our country. Please tell me we didn’t let an overwhelming wave of hate, irrational fear and stupidity guide the future of our nation. Look, I’m absolutely APPALLED by the people of this country. I just hope we’re all ready for a strong presence of racism, sexism, xenophobia, religious persecution and tax breaks for the rich. We’ve already seen bigots become way more emboldened as Trump gained power, and with him going to the Oval Office, I don’t see that weakening any time soon. When we add up a Republican presidency, Senate, House, and most likely, Supreme Court, that equals four years of unadulterated HELL!

In the end, I have nothing else to say, son. Nothing at all, man. All I know is, I’m not writing shit for the rest of this week, possibly longer. I’m done. Fucking done here. As my fiancée always says, “this country isn’t for us.” In this case, the “us” is literally EVERY disenfranchised group. Goodbye.

P.S. I don’t want to hear SHIT from anyone who didn’t vote or voted for a third-party candidate. They, along with a higher turnout of uneducated White voters, allowed this nonsense to happen. Thanks for absolutely nothing, y’all.

Shout-out To All Of My ‘Bad Hombres’

So, the debate, huh? They’re all finally over, huh? Thank the Lord, son. I couldn’t take one more of these outrageous debacles. I mean, if I really wanted to have my intelligence insulted, I’d go argue with a New England Patriots fan about the “Tuck Rule.” Side note, Pats fans, let’s cut the bullshit, man. Tom Brady fumbled the ball in that game. We all saw it on camera, bro. In any case, I’ve officially had enough of this presidential election. I’m tired of commenting on it and I’m tired of seeing the faces of Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. With that being said, good ol’ Trump left us all with one last gem: “bad hombres.”

Look, if anyone pays any attention to the news today, all of the pundits are on fire about a different Trump comment. Essentially, the man said he can’t guarantee that he’ll accept the outcome of the election if he loses. That statement is unprecedented because no other candidate has ever questioned the voting process this much BEFORE people went to the polls. In my eyes, he’s looking for an excuse for his inevitable loss. At this point, he’s behind is damn near every poll, son. So, instead of chalking his failure up to his ridiculous campaign, he’d rather point fingers and make nefarious allegations about voter fraud. Please note, these theories have been debunked by nearly everyone with a brain.

Now, while his stance about voting practices is the talk of the town, I’d rather speak about his “bad hombres” statement. Man, this dude just refuses to leave Hispanics alone, bro. Since the beginning of his campaign, he’s blamed Mexicans and other Hispanics for basically all of the crime going on in this country. Either they’re rapists, drug dealers or just crooked people. Yet and still, he somehow believes Hispanics will vote for him in a few weeks. I really don’t understand how that man thinks, son. He throws them under the bus EVERY chance he gets and still wants them to support him. That’s like me repeatedly kicking someone in the nuts and then looking for them to give me a job referral. It doesn’t work that way, bro. Not at all.

Ultimately, the “bad hombres” comment was the pinnacle of condescending rhetoric. Not only is he making unwarranted accusations about an ENTIRE group of people, but he’s mocking their language in the process. I mean, I can’t even properly quantify how fucked up that is, man. That’s like a cop saying “it’s lit” right before putting five bullets in my ass. This dude is a straight up cartoon character, but none of us find him funny. Wait, that’s probably why he’s always orange, man. He really is playing the part of a clown, son. All in all, I’m just glad this election cycle is nearly over. Now, we all need to make sure we do our part to keep this man FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR away from the Oval Office. Good day.