Damn, Meek Mill

So, Meek Mill is in a world of shit right now, son. I mean, there’s no way else to cut it or slice it, man. On Monday, Meek appeared in court to face the music for violating his probation. Now, even though the prosecutors recommended no jail time, Judge Genece E. Brinkley had a different plan in mind. After overseeing Meek’s case from its inception, she appeared to be over all of the shenanigans. With that being said, she sentenced Meek to 2-4 years in prison as punishment. Damn, Meek Mill.

Ok, so the question is, how did he get here? Now, while I do think the sentence is harsh, Meek didn’t make any of this shit easy on himself. Listen, if we’re keeping it a buck here, he was constantly getting into some type of tomfoolery. Look, I see several news sources pointing to his recent arrests being the culprit. But, that’s only half of the story, fam. In reality, there were more underlying factors that contributed to Meek’s situation. Shit, let’s go through some of them, bruh.

First, he was arrested back in March for a fight at a St. Louis airport. To be fair, those charges were dropped, son. Then, he pleaded guilty to reckless driving in October after he recorded himself riding a dirt bike here in New York. Look, as a lifelong NYC native, I could’ve told him that was a bad idea, man. The NYPD has a strong disdain for bikes in this city. On top of that, he kept doing shows outside of Philadelphia, even though the judge specifically told him not to. Frankly, Meek and his team made it easy to helm him up, fam.

Now, with all of that being said, does he deserve 4 years in prison? Nah, I’m not co-signing that shit, bruh. However; we can’t front like he didn’t put himself in a bad spot, son. On the real, if I knew I had a judge like Brinkley, I would sit my ass down, man. Look, there’s no need to end up on the wrong side of the law if it could be avoided, fam. All in all, there’s already enough of us in prison, bruh. There’s truly no need to add to the numbers, folks. Especially not over some dumb shit, people.

In the end, this shit is wack because I’m actually a Meek Mill fan. Real talk, he’s never dropped a bad project, son. Ok, yeah, people had jokes during the Drake debacle and the breakup with Nicki Minaj. However; the music never suffered, man. Ultimately, I’m going to be playing Dreams Worth More Than Money, Dreamchasers 4 and Wins & Losses at ignorant levels, fam. *Sigh* He was on a fucking streak before this shit happened, bruh. By and by, that’s all we’ve got until he’s free again. LC out.

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So… Nicki Minaj Finally Responded To Remy Ma…

Welp, the beef between Remy Ma and Nicki Minaj got wack very quickly, didn’t it? Look, it started off with a bang when “ShEther” came out. However; every subsequent event after the release of that song has been trash. I mean, Nicki was galavanting all over the world like she wasn’t thinking about this, while Remy put out the uber-basura “Another One.” In addition, Remy hit the interview circuit, talking to anyone who would listen about her gripes with Nicki. *Sigh* I was hoping for more, son. I was hoping for a helluva lot more, man. With all of that being said, Nicki’s response on the newly-released “No Frauds” can’t save this feud, bruh. It’s already dead.

So, in the middle of the night, Nicki decided to drop a trio of records. She put out the aforementioned “No Frauds” with Drake and Lil Wayne, “Changed It” with another Wayne feature, and “Regret In Your Tears,” a Meek Mill takedown. All in all, I guess these songs make sense since pictures of the recently-reunited trio started circulating around social media. I mean, it’s all cool in theory, but none of these records move me, man. Now, in regards to Nicki’s replies on “No Frauds,” they were good enough to beat “Another One,” but definitely not “ShEther.”

Moving on, after listening to that record a few times, it’s evident that Nicki is responding directly to “Another One.” This further proves the point that Remy’s second diss track was a terrible idea. If she just left it at “ShEther,” I doubt Nicki would’ve ever responded. Remy let her back in the game with that corny ass follow-up record. Shiiiit, everyone on her team should be fired for letting her release that garbage. In any case, Nicki made a couple of references to record sales and plastic surgery, but nothing hit hard for me.

Ultimately, this battle was not what I envisioned, son. I won’t lie, man, I’m disappointed in both Remy Ma and Nicki Minaj. On the real, both of these women can actually rap, bruh. I just wished they brought bigger guns to the shootout. This whole shit ended up being a waste, man. *Sigh* LC out.

P.S. Did Nicki really drop a diss song with features on it? Did Nicki really drop a diss song where the hook is a “No Type” ripoff? Man, this shit is an obvious ploy for radio play. When she enlists Drake and Wayne, she doesn’t even have to have a good song. The record will sell based on the names only. Look, either battle for real or don’t, Nicki. I can’t stand the tomfoolery, son. That is all.

P.P.S. Nicki’s Instagram rant was harder than the damn music. Man, what part of the game is this? She must’ve learned about “Twitter fingers” from Meek. Good Lord, this is fucking corny, son! For the last time, numbers don’t fucking matter! KRS-One was a nobody when he took down MC Shan. 50 Cent was underground when he destroyed Ja Rule. The game is soooo fucked up, man. *Sigh* No mas.

Remy Ma BODIED Nicki Minaj!

All jokes aside, I’m not even sure what to write here, son. Remy Ma just put her entire foot, ankle, shin and thigh in Nicki Minaj‘s ass, bro. While I believe these women have been throwing jabs at each other for a minute, Remy said “fuck the subliminals” and launched a nuke at Nicki. With that being said, Remy’s “ShEther” is fucking brutal, man. Nothing and no one was spared, son. So, me being me, of COURSE I have to dissect every nook and cranny of this conflict! Let’s do it!

Now, before I continue, I’d like to make a public service announcement. To all of the Nicki Minaj fans out there: money and success don’t mean shit right now. This is Rap music and it’s about lyrics. It’s about bars, son. Tour revenue and record sales don’t have shit to do with being a great rapper. If it did, MC Hammer would be the G.O.A.T. Hammer’s first three albums alone sold 15 million copies. Shit, Please Hammer, Don’t Hurt ‘Em sold 10 million of those copies by itself. I mean, who wasn’t singing “U Can’t Touch This,” man? In any case, a rapper’s lyrical supremacy can’t be judged by how many records they sell. It’s wholly irrelevant. Therefore, if that’s the argument for Nicki, then she already lost this battle.

Moving on, the timeline of the conflict between Remy and Nicki is interesting. Since Remy got out of prison, everyone assumed her post-incarceration bars were going at Nicki. Side note, did y’all peep the “post-incarceration bars” pun? Man, I crack myself the fuck up, son. Anyway, whether it was a random freestyle or her verse on the remix to PHresher‘s “Wait A Minute,” everyone believed she was coming at Nicki’s neck. Well, I guess we can add Nicki to that faction. Despite Remy’s claims that she never uttered a word about her, Nicki still clapped back in her verse on Gucci Mane‘s “Make Love.”

While flowing on Gucci’s song, Nicki essentially reiterated all of the shit I said didn’t matter in the second paragraph. In her eyes, in order to be the “queen of Rap,” an artist needs to sell records and have plaques. Now, listen, I’m actually a longtime Nicki fan, but I thought this verse was trash even before Remy responded. I swear, record sales always end up being an artist’s downfall. They’re always their best when they’re hungry. Then, they get some success and forget what made them great in the first place. Shit, we’re seeing this right now with Drake, but I’ll save that for another post.

So, Remy clearly heard the shots Nicki threw her way and decided to UNLEASH! Listen, “ShEther” encompasses about every brand of disrespect imaginable. She accused Nicki of fucking Drake, Gucci, Lil Wayne, Trey Songz and Ebro Darden from Hot 97. She claimed that Nicki couldn’t fuck Meek Mill for three months because her ass implants popped. She ridiculed Nicki for supporting her brother, a 37-year-old grown ass man who’s accused of raping a 12-year-old girl. I mean, it goes on and on, son. Napalm blast after napalm blast, bro. Seven minutes of pure, unadulterated pain.

At this point, Nicki HAS to respond, man! There’s no way she can take the Jay Z approach and just let that shit slide. I mean, social media has been ON FIRE all weekend, son! Platinum plaques can’t save her when her name is being dragged for filth. This is Rap music, bro. The gloves are off and it’s time to roll around in the mud. All I can say is, as harsh as “ShEther” was, I wouldn’t be surprised if Nicki threw a miscarriage punchline at Remy. Yeah, the battle has already gotten that ugly, son. Ultimately, as long as it stays on wax, I just want these two women to rap.

In the end, battling is alive and well, man! Let’s get these bars off, son! Rap is a contact sport, bro. As Nas said, the best are supposed to clash at the top. Let’s get it! LC out.

P.S. While this post was written from a completely objective perspective, I’d be remiss if I didn’t put one in the air for the Bronx. Stand the fuck up, son! That is all.

P.P.S. I’ve heard a few people say that a diss track can’t be effective if everything isn’t 100% fact. If that were truly the case, no one would ever say “Ether” was better than “Takeover.” Jay accurately broke down Nas’ entire life, son. In the end, just enjoy the show, son. Ok, bye.

Did André 3000 Really Diss Drake?


Well, well, well, what do we have here, son? A verse from the one and only André 3000. Now, I’m not being superfluous when I say this, but I really think 3 Stacks has only dropped two verses in my youngest son’s lifetime. Given his reclusive nature, getting two or three verses since the beginning of 2014 is progress, man. With that being said, I’d be remiss if I didn’t over analyze every line on his recent contribution to Frank Ocean‘s Blond album. Namely, did he really come for Drake‘s neck?

First, let me just acknowledge the fact Frank Ocean put out not one but TWO albums last week. After threatening to do harm to pets if he didn’t release a record, Ocean finally honored my request and flooded the market with new tunes. With that being said, everyone reading this should thank me. I made all of this happen, bruh. Side bar, as of right now, I’m not the biggest fan of either Blond or Endless, but I’ll save that hot take for another time, son.

In any case, the real news right now is the speculation behind 3000’s lyrics on “Solo (Reprise).” While he wax poetically on a variety of topics ranging from the hardships of being a woman to police violence, it was his thought process on ghostwriting that raised the world’s collective Rock eyebrow. Towards the end of the song, Dré states “After 20 years in, I’m so naive I was under the impression that everyone wrote they own verses, it’s coming back different and yeah that shit hurts me.” Immediately, social media lost its fucking mind and everyone assumed he was referring to good ol’ Drake.

Now, I have two conflicting thoughts about 3000’s intentions with those bars. On one hand, why the fuck would someone of his magnitude come out of hibernation just to take a swipe at Drake? Dré’s never been the one to do things simply for recognition, and as a longtime fan, I’ve never seen him beef with anyone. In addition, Drake ain’t the only dude who’s used ghostwriters in Hip Hop history. At this point, if anyone is shocked to learn Dr. Dre, Diddy and Kanye West don’t write all of their rhymes, I would question whether they’re familiar with Rap music at all. Hell, even the first Rap hit inadvertently had a ghostwriter, son. Grandmaster Caz wrote the rhyme Big Bank Hank said on The Sugarhill Gang‘s “Rapper’s Delight.” This practice is far from new in Hip Hop, man.

On the other hand, of COURSE he’s talking about Drake, son. Ever since Meek Mill jumped off of the ledge and called Drake out for not penning his own bars, he’s been the most public example of a potentially fradulent rapper. At this point, he’s the main guy getting called out for using other artists’ words. So, who else would really inspire 3000 to take this stance at this particular time? Either way, Drake needs to sit this one out, man. Look, I’ve already said he needed to avoid Eminem like the Zika Virus. Now, he damn sure needs to add 3 Stacks to that list. Any man who can spit the shit he did on “Return of the ‘G’” is not to be fucked with, son.

Ultimately, I’m just glad André found his way into someone’s vocal booth. While I gave up hope for a solo album a long time ago, I’m just happy to know he’s still a fucking animal. Welcome back, 3000. Welcome back. Now, just please put out another record before I have another kid. Thanks and good day.

Man, Drake Ain’t Battling Eminem

Ok, look, let’s stop the foolishness right now, son. It really doesn’t matter what Ebro Darden from Hot 97 says. There’s no way in Hell Drake and Eminem are going to battle each other. According to Ebro, he told Drake that Em was going to diss him and Drake replied that he had something for him if he does. Come on, son, I don’t believe that tall tale for a second, man. With that being said, can we put all of these hypotheticals to rest? At the end of the day, we all need to be completely honest with each other: Em would eat Aubrey for breakfast, lunch, dinner and fourth meal.

Let me start this dissertation by getting one item out of the way: popularity doesn’t matter, son. Everyone knows Drake is the most popular rapper in the world right now. However; his greatest successes don’t really compare to Em’s. Yeah, Drake has the most number-one Rap songs in history, but Em has two diamond-selling albums. Allow me to put that in perspective for a second. In the history of the world, only nine Rap albums have ever sold ten million records and Eminem has two of them. That’s some straight Adele shit, bro. So, in regards to this imaginary battle, success is irrelevant. Eminem wins that fight by default, man.

Now, let’s talk about actual skills here. In case anyone forgot where Eminem came from, he was literally bred to be a battle rapper. Don’t believe me? Just hit up YouTube and see a younger version of him royally roast a variety of opponents for the world to see. On the other hand, it doesn’t even seem like Drake considers him a rapper. In “Back To Back,” his damn near career-ending diss to Meek Mill, he uttered the words “you’re getting bodied by a singing nigga.” In addition, on “Big Amount,” his most recent guest appearance on a 2 Chainz song, he definitely said Rap is something he does “on the side.” From that mentality alone, he shouldn’t want ANY parts of the “Rap God.” After all of these years and all of the records sold, Em still writes rhymes with the focus of a broke dude trying to get a record deal. It would be asinine for Drake to pick a fight with a man who’s that dedicated to rhyming words together.

Finally, just listen to this damn song, man. I don’t care what anyone says in response to this. There is absolutely no rhyme in Drake’s catalog that can fuck with the first verse of this track. From a straight technical standpoint, it’s a genius display of wordplay, man. This ain’t rhyming to make a meme, bro. This is rhyming to make a motherfucker regret stepping into a circumference of body blows. Honestly speaking, if Drake has any real friends, they should tell him to debunk this story, even though I never believed it was real to begin with. Someone needs to save that man ASAP.

In the end, I don’t want it to seem like I’m a Drake hater here. I’m actually a huge fan of that guy’s music. Shit, “Under Ground Kings” is one of my theme songs, man. However; when it comes to Eminem, we’re talking about one of the greatest human beings to ever put a metaphor to a bass line. Also, we’re forgetting one crucial element here: if Drake didn’t want any static from Joe Budden, he damn sure doesn’t want to end up in Em’s crosshairs. Ultimately, we’ll never know, though. Drake seems to prefer taking shots at Funkmaster Flex, for God knows what reason. In any case, adios, good people.

P.S. Shout-out to my dude Kurt for inspiring this post. Yessir.

What The Hell Are Joe Budden & Drake Doing?

To start off, the fact I’m a few weeks late in regards to speaking about this subject is very telling. In all honesty, I thought the foolishness would’ve died down by now, but noooooo. Everyday, a new detail comes out about the rift between Joe Budden and Drake, and I’m more confused than I was previously. Is this what rap beef has become, man? If so, I want absolutely no parts of it, son.

Usually, when I’m speaking about a new subject, I might say something like “in case you missed it.” However; if anyone hasn’t heard about this situation yet, then I wonder if that person has access to the Internet. The only part that might be fuzzy to people is how the shenanigans began in the first place. Now, for anyone confused about this facet of the story, let me fill in the details.

To begin, Joe has a weekly podcast titled I’ll Name This Podcast Later. Right after Drake’s Views album came out, Joe took to his podcast to say Aubrey sounded “real fucking uninspired.” He also said this in a vocal tone that was so passionate, I was dying from laughter while listening to the show. From there, French Montana popped up on Instagram, playing a snippet of a new song he had with Drake, where Drake can be heard saying “pump, pump, pump it up” at the beginning of his verse. Now, for anyone familiar with rap music, they’ll probably remember “Pump It Up” was the highest charting song Joe Budden ever released. With that being said, the Interwebz lost its collective mind with speculation that Drake was coming to “Meek Mill” Joey.

Never one to back down from a lyrical challenge, Joe decided to strike first with a diss track titled “Making A Murderer Pt. 1.” After receiving no response, he doubled back and released another diss track, this one called “Wake.” For me, this is where shit starts to get extra silly, son. Instead of releasing a real rebuttal to Joe, the full version of Montana’s “No Shopping” finally came out, with Drake’s lines towards Joe on display. As retaliation, Joe put out a third diss song, “Afraid.” Finally, after another period of radio silence from Drake, Joe dropped ANOTHER diss song, this one called “Just Because.”

Ok, look, this entire feud makes absolutely no sense to me. The bars on “No Shopping” are what got this whole shindig started in the first place. Joe already released two songs addressing these lines. So, why would he send out MORE bars to re-address the same shit he already addressed? In addition, why the fuck is Drake so quiet? I don’t want to hear the “Joe Budden is irrelevant” argument I’m seeing all over social media. If his words were really that irrelevant, Drake wouldn’t have taken shots at him on French’s song, he wouldn’t have mentioned Joe’s name during a recent concert and he wouldn’t be DMing Joe on Instagram. Side bar, what part of rap beef is DMing your opponent? What part of rap beef is inviting your adversary to a concert at Madison Square Garden and daring said adversary to release 25 diss tracks beforehand for $10,000? What happened to the days when dudes actually traded real bars with one another? Memes ain’t got shit to do with lyrical ability, son. That’s why I can’t respect what Drake is doing right. He can respond to Meek, but he’s too shook to get at people like Joe and Pusha T, who’s been lighting his ass up for some time now.

In the end, rap has become so corny, man. I can’t take the tomfoolery anymore. Good thing I’ve got this Maxwell blackSUMMERS’night album in rotation, son. I might as well get my woman in the mood to drop them drawers as opposed to watching grown men act like children. Good day.