I Almost Disowned My Mother Over Stan Lee

So, allow me to keep it a buck for a second, son. Real talk, if anyone doesn’t understand how legendary Stan Lee was/is, then I really don’t want to know that person. Taking it a step further, if I have a friend/family member who doesn’t comprehend Lee’s GOAT‘ness, then I’m not sure that I can continue our relationship. I mean, Lee was The Gawd, man! Seriously, where the fuck would Marvel Comics or the overall zeitgeist be if Lee never existed, fam? Shit, I don’t even want to imagine such a world. All in all, Rest In Peace to one of the greatest dudes ever!

Ok, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, let me explain the title of this post, bruh. So, once upon a time in elementary school, I was a HUGE comic book fan. Side note, I dare someone to test my knowledge on anything before like 2005. Honestly, I’ve got this, son. In any case, around like the third grade, I came across a special comic book: an original edition of Amazing Spider-Man #300. Now, for anyone who is unaware, this issue contains the first full-length appearance of Venom. Moving on, the comic first came out in 1988, but somehow in the early 1990s, I found an original copy. Needless to say, I was fucking HYPED, man!

Anyway, even though Lee didn’t write that particular issue, it’s no secret that Peter Parker was his brainchild. Hell, Parker along with every other Marvel character who has ever mattered, fam. All I can say is, getting ahold of Venom’s first foray meant EVERYTHING to me, bruh! On the real, I read that comic once and put it back in the plastic, son. Listen, I didn’t want to risk creasing it, man.

Now, fast forward to my freshman year of boarding school. I came home for my first vacation and noticed my room looked a little different. Most notably, my bookcase seemed to be missing all of my comic books. To add insult to injury, I definitely noticed that Spider-Man #300 was missing. From there, I asked my mom where my comics were and she uttered four words that changed our relationship: “I threw them out.” I immediately asked her why she would do such a thing and she said “you’re a teenager now, I figured you wouldn’t want them anymore.” All I know is, that might’ve been the only time I legitimately wanted to hit my own mother with the Stone Cold Stunner.

Look, I told that story to highlight one main point: Stan Lee invented a universe that I NEEDED to be a part of. Like, he created characters with nuance, fam. He created characters with ethos. For God‘s sake, he based Professor X and Magneto on Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X! What else do people need to know, bruh?! Yeah, these heroes had unreal abilities, but a lot of them had VERY real problems, son. Keeping it a buck, what awkward teenager couldn’t relate to Peter Parker? Being a superhero didn’t absolve him from the trash-ness of high school, man. The fact is, Lee built a world that all of us could identify with AND get lost in.

In the end, RIP to the greatest! Ultimately, his influence will forever be solidified. By and by, Marvel is stronger than ever and it’s directly because of his influence. At the end of the day, legends never die, fam. Long live Stan Lee! That is all. LC out.

P.S. Man, I still don’t know if I’ve forgiven my mom. Look, I just Google‘d the price of an original copy of that Spider-Man issue and got mad all over again. *Sigh* Her and I need to have another discussion, son. Good day.

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Black Republicans Aren’t The Issue, Chance The Rapper

So, I’m not going to talk about Kanye West today, son. Frankly, my brain can’t even begin to process the fuckery he’s saying right now. On the real, I don’t know what’s worse, man: the idea that he really believes all of the bullshit he’s tweeting or the idea that he’s trolling us as an album rollout. In any case, I want to address Chance The Rapper and people who think like him. Look, no one said that Black people can’t be Republicans, fam. Real talk, people don’t hate Donald Trump because he’s Republican, bruh. We hate him because of his consistent disrespect and disregard of the disenfranchised.

Now, for those who missed it, Chance just tried to save Kanye. Somehow, he thought that tweeting “Black people don’t have to be Democrats” was some profound shit, son. However, nobody said that, Chance! That ain’t the fucking issue, man! On top of that, CyHi the Prynce took it upon himself to remind us that Martin Luther King, Jr. was a Republican. Ok, so was James Brown and Ray Charles, fam. Once again, that isn’t the fucking problem, fam! Keeping it a buck, Trump’s lunacy should be a bipartisan issue. Listen, people on the Right AND the Left should be bothered by what Trump represents.

Listen, when it comes to Trump, I’ve watched that man commit an unbelievable amount of egregious offenses. This is the same man who called all Hispanic people drug dealers, murderers and rapists on the campaign trail. This is the same man who enacted a travel ban to block Muslims from coming to a “religiously free” country. This is the same man who’s currently trying to block transgender people from serving in our military. This is the same man who’s trying to give guns to our underpaid teaching staff. This is the same man who’s surrounded himself with a MULTITUDE of people who are now under investigation. Need I say more?! Look, this isn’t a Democrat or Republican issue, bruh. This is an issue of a man who’s CLEARLY unfit to lead and we’re just letting him cook, son.

In the end, folks like Chance can miss me with this Black Republican shit, man. In addition, people like Kanye can miss me with the “I don’t agree with everything he says” rhetoric. Ultimately, that doesn’t make up for all of Trump’s heinous policies, fam. By and by, just because people may only agree with SOME of Trump’s ideas doesn’t mean that the rest of them go away. At the end of the day, it’s a package deal, bruh. For example, we can’t pay attention to his platform on jobs and ignore his platform on women’s rights, son. All I know is, folks like Chance need to fully develop their political and social stances before they open their mouths. That is all. LC out.

Really, Killer Mike?

So, let me begin this post by saying that I’m a HUGE Killer Mike fan. Because of this, I’m thoroughly disappointed that I’m writing this article, son. In any case, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t keep it real at all times. With that being said, I have to hold Mike accountable for his actions on NRATV. All in all, I’ve always understood his argument about Black gun ownership. However; an NRA platform is the LAST place he needs to be expressing his views, man.

Now, before I continue, let me make myself clear: I agree with Killer Mike. I agree with the notion that we as Black people need to protect ourselves in this country. Look, it goes without saying that we’ve been a target for violence in America ever since we got off of the boats, fam. Anyway, while I am absolutely behind creating a more comprehensive system for gun ownership, I also believe in bearing arms. Hell, if New York‘s gun laws weren’t so damn insane, I’d most likely own a weapon right now, bruh.

Moving on, I say all of that to say that Mike’s message isn’t my issue with him. My issue is the fact that he sat down with the NRA. Now, in his apology video, he stated that he tried to take a page out of Martin Luther King‘s book and have a dialogue with the other side. However; all the NRA did was take Mike’s words and use them to attack the March for Our Lives movement. Listen, for somebody as intelligent as Mike, I’m disappointed that he allowed himself to be a pawn in a politicized game. Ok, yes, his intentions were pure, but he should’ve known that these people don’t have our best interests at heart. On the real, they never have and they never will, son. Shit, just ask the Black Panthers, folks.

In the end, I hope this is a lesson for Mike. Ultimately, if he wants to have an honest conversation with people he disagrees with, he needs to do it on neutral land. By and by, he can’t go into their space and expect them to play fairly. At the end of the day, a well-meaning talk was turned into a weapon, pun intended. *Sigh* That’s what we get for trying to be reasonable, man. LC out.

Fun Fact: Barack Obama Invented Racism

Ok, can I ask everyone out there a question? With all of the racial tension currently bubbling in America, is it bad that Kathy Miller‘s ABSURD comments were just the laugh I needed? I mean, I’ve heard some preposterous statements in my lifetime, but Miller has reached a Jedi Grand Master level of stupid. But hey, what can I expect from a staunch supporter of Donald Trump?

Now, we do I begin? Ok, so, Kathy Miller was Trump’s campaign chair for Mahoning County in Ohio. I used the word “was” because after the barrel of fuckery she uttered during an interview with The Guardian, she promptly stepped down. In any case, what made this interview highly entertaining is the fact she believes racism didn’t exist until Barack Obama became president. In addition, she commented that she never experienced segregation and never saw the civil rights movement “as anything.” To top it all off, she claimed that Black people have always had the same opportunities as White people. For example, she referenced our “access” to the same schools as everyone else. Look, I could keep going, but it’s time to start tearing this truffle butter stain to shreds.

First, I find it incredibly odd that she stressed if Black people haven’t risen up in the last 50 years, then it’s our fault. Why 50 years, Kathy? Ohhhh, maybe that’s because we only got the right to vote about 50 years ago! Why didn’t we have the right to vote before that, Kathy? Institutional bigotry, dumbass! Racial discrimination in the voting process only became illegal in 1965. 19-motherfucking-65, man! My mother was a legit fourteen years old when this occurred. That’s how short of a time period we’re talking about, son.

Moving on, how can she claim we always had access to the same schools when SEGREGATION EXISTED?! Oh, wait, I forgot, she never experienced that. So, since some random White woman never came face-to-face with what was happening in damn near every American neighborhood, segregation must not have been real. Look, our inability to get accepted into predominantly White colleges was a fundamental reason for why HBCUwere created in the first place. Funny thing is, these same schools always allowed access to students of all races. Can these historically White institutions make that same claim? Absolutely not, son.

Lastly, I’m not even going to comment on her views about the civil rights movement. I mean, my day off from work on Martin Luther King Jr. Day is all of the proof I need, son. That man literally took a bullet for Black people, yet this woman denies the movement was even real. *Sigh* Idiocy knows no bounds, son. It honestly, truly, knows no bounds.

In the end, all I can say is, these type of people really walk the streets, man. Like, Kathy Miller is an actual human being. She isn’t someone we made up. She really breathes air and drinks water, son. With that being said, it’s mind-boggling that there are people out there who are this stupid. Shit, not only stupid, but actually in charge of organizations. Man, I wouldn’t even let this woman work the deep fryer at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Once again, this is the kind of tomfoolery Trump inspires. Need I say more? Good day.