Kevin Hart Is Having A Bad Month

So, let’s just skip the formalities and get straight to the shits, son. On the real, Kevin Hart is having a bad month, man. First, there’s the car crash. Now, regardless of speculation, here’s what’s being reported. Apparently, a dude named Jared Black was driving Hart’s 1970 Plymouth Barracuda and rolled into a ditch. The story is, Hart and Black were injured in the crash, but Rebecca Broxterman, the third passenger and Eniko Hart‘s personal trainer, was not hospitalized. Anyway, that would be enough to sit out the rest of September. However, Montia Sabbag had a different plan in mind, fam.

Ok, for those who are unfamiliar, Sabbag is the woman that Hart was smashing on candid camera two years ago. Now, at first, she blamed Jonathan Todd Jackson for the entire ordeal. For reference, Jackson is an actor and former friend of Hart’s who tried to swindle Hart for money to retrieve the recording. In any case, back then, Sabbag stated that Hart was a victim like her. All I know is, something must’ve changed in her mind, son.

Moving on, Sabbag, with the “help” of Lisa Bloom, has decided to sue Hart for $60 million. Now, according to Sabbag, Hart conspired with Jackson to record her in order to gain publicity for Hart’s Irresponsible Tour. All I can say is, that’s literally the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my life, man. Like, is she serious, fam? Does she really believe that Kevin Hart, the most famous comedian in the world, needs a hotel sex tape to promote his tour? Real talk, the level of delusional is unprecedented, bruh.

Listen, let me be clear, son. In my eyes, Sabbag has every right to feel like her privacy was invaded. Frankly, no one deserves to have their intimate moments filmed without their consent. But, the idea that Hart needed extra publicity is nonsensical, man. As I stated before, he’s literally the most famous comedian on the planet. Shit, it doesn’t matter if people find him funny or not. The fact is, Kevin Hart is one of the most recognizable celebrities on Earth. There is literally NOTHING Sabbag could do or say to make him more famous than he already is. If anything, we looked at Hart like a cotdamn idiot for getting caught out there, again. At this point, Bloom needs to tell her client to sit the fuckity-fuck down, fam.

In the end, Montia Sabbag needs to knock it off, bruh. Ultimately, this lawsuit is nothing more than an obvious money-grab, son. By and by, people were going to see Kevin Hart’s tour with or without footage of his hotel sex-capades. At the end of the day, Sabbag’s 15 minutes are over, man. Just let it go, ma’am. Just let it go. That is all. LC out.

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It Be Ya Own People: Kevin Hart Edition

So, this Kevin Hart infidelity shit just took a weird turn, huh? I mean, when I read that someone was trying to extort him with a sex tape, I just assumed it was one of the women in the video, son. On the real, I would’ve never imagined that the culprit might be someone from his inner circle, man. In any case, if the rumors are true, then Jonathan Todd Jackson is a fucking clown, fam. All in all, what part of the game is trying to extort a friend, bruh?

Ok, before I continue, allow me to be petty for a second, son. Now, while researching this story, I’ve seen several media outlets refer to Jackson as either JT or Action Jackson. First off, we already have a JT and his name is Justin Timberlake, man. Furthermore, that JT is already on thin ice after his Man of the Woods album, fam. Needless to say, we don’t need anymore fuckery from someone who goes by JT. Second, there’s only one Action Jackson and his name is Carl Weathers, bruh. Look, I ain’t never see Jonathan Todd square up with Rocky Balboa or Predator, folks. So, he doesn’t have the right to use the “Action” moniker.

Anyway, let’s get back to Jackson’s tomfoolery, son. Now, according to reports, Jackson has been charged with attempted extortion and extortion by threatening letter. Apparently, he somehow got a copy of Hart’s sex tape and tried to swindle some money out of the comedian. This is notable because these dudes used to be boys. Real talk, I only recognize Jackson’s face because of his proximity to Hart, man. Shit, I can specifically remember seeing him in Think Like a Man Too, a film that starred Hart. So, I think it’s safe to say that Hart got homie a roll in that film.

My thing is, what would lead that dude to attempt this fuck shit, fam? Keeping it a buck, if my boy tried to shake me for some cash, I might as well just confess, bruh. I’d much rather take the risk with my wife than give a carpetbagger any of my bread, son. On top of that, this friend, now former friend, would have to catch these hands, man. Lastly, I’d make him film his own beatdown, since he likes tapes so damn much. Good Lord, Jackson is a straight dumbass for this shit, people.

In the end, I hope those felony charges were worth it, son. Ultimately, if Jackson gets convicted, those consequences ain’t gonna be sweet, man. At the end of the day, stupid is as stupid does, shout-out to Forrest Gump. By and by, Jackson is the definition of stupid, fam. That is all. LC out.