Ayesha Curry Can’t Have It Both Ways

So, let me keep it real, son. I’m going to try my best to utilize my analytical side and not my “I’m a husband who’d want to drop kick somebody” side. Frankly, I’m not here to bash Ayesha Curry, man. On the real, I’m just trying to make sense of her nonsensical-ness, fam. All in all, she can’t want attention from men AND get mad at the attention that Steph Curry gets.

Ok, for those who missed it, Mrs. Curry sat down with Jada Pinkett Smith, Willow Smith and Adrienne Banfield-Norris for an episode of Red Table Talk. Now, although a variety of topics were touched on during the discussion, a few tidbits caught people’s attention. First, Curry talked about how she hates the reactions that Steph gets from women. I mean, that’s completely understandable, bruh. Like, what spouse wants to see their significant other ogled by outsiders?

Now, if that’s where the discussion ended, then all would be well, son. Instead, Curry divulged a little bit more information. To be more specific, she chose to illuminate some of her own insecurities. In any case, she stated that she wishes she got more “male attention.” Apparently, while Steph has been dodging all of these unwanted eyes, Ayesha wishes more men looked at her in that way. In fact, due to the lack of gazing stares, she began to wonder if something was wrong with her.

Look, I’m not an idiot, man. Real talk, everyone likes to know that people find them attractive. However, that shit needs to stop mattering when you’re fucking married. On top of that, she can’t get mad at women for wanting Steph when she desires the same type of interest. Furthermore, I need some of the ladies out there to stop caping for her, fam. Hell, if someone’s husband told them “damn, I wish these ladies looked my way more,” they’d be fucking pissed, bruh. All I know is, Steph and Ayesha need to be enough for Steph and Ayesha.

In the end, Ayesha needs to let that shit go, son. Ultimately, as long as she has Steph and Steph has her, outside influences shouldn’t matter, man. In addition, this is the last thing homie needs right now, fam. By and by, he’s having a rough time in the playoffs, bruh. Shit, I wouldn’t put it past an opponent to throw this in his face on the court, folks. At the end of the day, we need to be careful what we wish for, brethren. She might get that attention she wants and fuck up her marriage. Knock it off, Ayesha. That is all. LC out.

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Will Smith Needs To Put Hands On August Alsina

So, I have an idea for Will Smith. Now, I know he’s in the middle of his Will Smith’s Bucket List show. Anyway, I truly believe he should add “beat a dude’s ass on camera” to the docket, son. I mean, he might really need to give August Alsina that work, man. Listen, as a husband myself, I wouldn’t even care about the truth, fam. The way I see it, insinuations of infidelity are enough for someone to catch these hands, elbows, knees and feet, bruh.

Ok, for those who missed it, Alsina may be out here wilin’, son. Now, the singer just dropped a new song/video called “Nunya.” On the track, he’s waxing poetic about a woman who isn’t giving him any action, but still asking about his sex life. Moving on, in the visuals, a text message is shown with him and a woman named Koren. Side note, this is notable because social media is alleging that Jada Pinkett Smith’s middle name is “Koren.” In any case, a GIF of Jada appears in the text thread and Alsina also sings “you’re just an actress putting on a show.”

Now, let me explain why Will needs to beat the brakes off of this dude. Look, if a guy I know smashed my wife, he needs to catch these hands. If a guy I know even makes it seem like he’s smashing my wife, he needs to catch these hands. Shit, I know that Alsina has always maintained that he’s super close to the Smith family. But, if I were Will, I’d like to know why homie feels comfortable enough to be this damn ambiguous. Nah, fam, someone needs to get put in a leg lock, man. Frankly, Alsina is way outta pocket with this track, bruh.

In the end, Will Smith knows what he needs to do, son. Ultimately, he’s the king of viral moments right now. So, why not unleash the Philly hands on Instagram, man? By and by, it’ll be the most cherished video in the history of social media, fam. At the end of the day, I’d pay any amount of money to watch Will Smith sleep August Alsina on film, bruh. That is all. LC out.

‘All Eyez On Me’ Was Trash

Disclaimer: Spoilers, spoilers and more spoilers. Listen, don’t say I didn’t warn you, man.

Look, I’m not going to lie, son. I actually feel bad that I’m about to ether a Black movie. I mean, I always try to support my people, especially in an industry that rarely represents us correctly. However; I also feel like I have the right to criticize something I spent my money on. On the real, work is not exempt from judgment just because my people were involved. With that being said, this new All Eyez On Me movie about Tupac Shakur is trash, garbage and basura, son. Listen, I’m the biggest Pac fan in the world and I left the theater disappointed. Now, let me explain myself further.

So, before I begin the drag fest, let me talk about some of the positives of the film. First, the casting is good. Well, in certain places, son. Anyway, Demetrius Shipp Jr., Danai Gurira and Kat Graham are convincing as Pac, Afeni Shakur and Jada Pinkett-Smith, respectively. They all look the part and they deliver their lines with conviction. However; the lines they are forced to utter are fucking terrible, son. All in all, that brings us to our first major problem.

Bruh, who wrote the fucking dialogue for this movie? Man, every single conversation drags because the interactions between the characters are comically bad. On the real, I literally said “what the fuck” while watching a scene where Pac is recording “Brenda’s Got A Baby.” The scene is supposed to convey Pac’s need to improve his circumstances, but just makes him look like an asshole who’s barking on some hapless engineer. The dialogue simply isn’t good enough to properly depict his mental state.

Next, the film goes from 1971, the year of his birth, to 1991 in the first twenty minutes. So, the filmmakers can dedicate two hours to the last five years of his life, but barely flesh out the formative years that made him? Son, I don’t want to simply see a reenactment of his finals days. Pac was all over the damn news during these years, fam. A lot of us already know about the fuck shit he got himself into. On the other hand, delving into his childhood with Afeni and Mutulu Shakur could’ve been eye-opening. Delving into his time in Marin City, California could’ve been informative. Honestly, it would’ve given the audience some context into why Pac behaved the way he did.

Moving on, the movie is also inaccurate. I mean, Jada said it herself. In real life, Pac never read her the letter he wrote for her. He never told her he was going to California. Also, they never had an argument about his tomfoolery at one of his concerts. To make matters worse, Pac is using a cotdamn iPhone in one of the scenes! Good fucking Lord, man! This entire film is half-baked and half-assed. L.T. Hutton and Benny Boom should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves, son.

In the end, I can’t recommend this movie to anyone. I wasted my money on this shit, fam. Keeping it a buck, this travesty took two and a half hours of my life, bruh. Seriously, I had to go play The Don Killuminati to get this shit out of my head. Needless to say, this film isn’t Straight Outta Compton. Ultimately, I guess we can blame that movie for making fools think this bullshit would work. *Sigh* LC out.