Fraud, As Told By Ja Rule

Oh my god, this is terrible. Could somebody please find Ja Rule, get ahold of this motherfucker, so I can make sense of all this? Where is Ja?

So, as usual, Dave Chappelle said it all, son. All I know is, I laughed way harder than I should’ve while watching that Fyre documentary on Netflix. Real talk, the Fyre Festival was one of the biggest scams I’ve ever seen, man. Now, before watching this doc, I already knew that a ton of fuckery went down. However, I was thoroughly baffled to see how much nonsense Ja and Billy McFarland tried to get away with. Furthermore, I was confused about how people fell for this shit. All in all, this entire saga was a glorious train wreck, fam.

Ok, for those who missed it, the failed Fyre Festival is back in the news. As of right now, there are two documentaries making their rounds on streaming services. First, there’s the aforementioned Fyre doc on Netflix. In addition, there’s the Fyre Fraud doc on Hulu. Keeping it a buck, I can only speak on the Netflix joint since I don’t have Hulu. Anyway, while watching the footage with my wife, I was blown away by this whole operation, bruh. I mean, this idea was doomed from the start, son. Frankly, I have no idea why anyone went along with this bullshit, man.

Now, where do I even begin, fam? Look, there was NO way McFarland and company could pull any of their promises off, bruh. Shit, McFarland lied to people about EVERYTHING. Like, he had no island, no luxury lodging, no headlining acts and no one to tell him to chill. But, he always found a way to get folks to invest more of their money, son. Hell, all it took was a co-sign from Ja, Kendall Jenner, Bella Hadid, Emily Ratajkowski and Chanel Iman. From there, people were ready to commit, man. All I know is, there was never a time where this festival would even remotely work, brethren.

Keeping it a buck, I have a hard time feeling sorry for people, son. Ok, yes, I feel terrible for the Bahamian folks who were taken advantage of. Side note, shout-out to the GoFundMe campaign that raised close to $200,000 for MaryAnn Rolle. After taking a HUGE loss for trying to feed people during the festival, it appears that she’s been made whole again. In any case, that’s where my sympathy stops, man. Seriously, anyone who fell for the “villa tent” mirage is an idiot, fam. Like, I saw someone write “will my tent have an outlet” in an email to McFarland. No, dumbass! Folks should’ve been happy with ham sandwiches and FEMA tents. That’s all McFarland had for them, bruh.

In the end, Ja Rule needs to be honest, son. Ultimately, false advertising is the same as fraud, man. By and by, Billy McFarland and Ja finessed folks with Joanne The Scammer-like precision, fam. At the end of the day, I have no clue how Ja skated, bruh. I mean, he got hit with a class action lawsuit, but he’s not facing prison time like McFarland. *Sigh* At least I can still hold onto Ja’s first three albums, folks. He’s been up to nonstop tomfoolery ever since. That is all. LC out.

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I Thought Mexico Was Paying For The Wall, Donald Trump

So, I have a serious question for all Donald Trump supporters. Now, all jokes aside, are y’all okay with this government shutdown? Like, are y’all okay with American lives being negatively impacted over a border wall that Trump said Mexico would pay for? Then again, why am I even asking, son? Roughly 300,000 people have raised over $18 million on GoFundMe for this very wall, man. All I know is, Trump lied (again) to his own base and they’re either too ambivalent or too dumb to care, fam.

Ok, to be real, I shouldn’t have to explain to anyone what’s going on right now, bruh. Shit, as of today, the government shutdown has been in effect for almost two weeks. Now, under normal circumstances, a shutdown is already trash, son. However, this particular one is especially garbage because it began during the holidays, man. Meaning, scores of Americans had to go through Christmas and New Year’s Day without their money or benefits. To make matters worse, the catalyst of this shutdown is a stupid ass wall that taxpayers aren’t even supposed to be responsible for.

Look, let’s be perfectly clear here, fam. During his presidential campaign, Trump FREQUENTLY reiterated that Mexico was going to pay for a wall along the border between their country and the United States. I mean, that promise was THE fundamental piece of his platform, bruh. Anyway, after the former and current Mexican presidents told Trump to go fuck himself, his wall became our problem. All I know is, it’s fucking ridiculous, son. For God‘s sake, he’s denying federal employees their pay for something that was never our fucking responsibility, man! Frankly, I have NO idea why his supporters are even remotely okay with this, brethren.

In the end, this is example 2,336,736 of why Donald Trump is a terrible fucking president, son. Ultimately, the fool behind The Art of the Deal has let three government shutdowns occur on his watch. *Sigh* I’m just tired of the constant fuckery, man. Trump can never make a deal, consistently loses cabinet members and his base is still none the wiser. By and by, THIS is why reasonable people think Trump supporters are stupid, fam. This is why. That is all. LC out.

Justice For Junior

So, those who know me know that I’m a Bronx dude to my core. Like, the way I walk, talk and act come directly from my Boogie Down upbringing. However, I’m also familiar with the fuckery that can transpire in my borough. With that being said, I can’t put into words how tragic Lesandro Guzman-Feliz‘s death is, son. All I know is, NO explanation, justification or scenario can justify what those demons did to that 15-year-old boy.

Ok, for those who are unaware, Feliz, better known as Junior, was horrifically murdered last week. Now, at first, no one knew why members of the Trinitarios gang targeted Junior. Based on initial information, all we knew is that five men literally dragged Junior out of a bodega and hacked him with machetes. Sadly, the entire event was captured on video surveillance and cellphone footage. From there, Junior stumbled to St. Barnabas Hospital, where he later died.

Now, as more intel is being gathered, we now know that this whole tragedy is a case of mistaken identity. Apparently, all of this stemmed from a sextape circulating around social media. As the story goes, a video was making its rounds that showed a teen girl having sex with one boy while another boy rapped next to them. From what I understand, the girl is related to one of the dudes who was looking for Junior. In any case, they targeted Junior because he looked like the boy rapping in the video. Problem is, THAT WASN’T HIM!

Moving on, when these assholes realized they killed the wrong kid, they tried to apologize to the family in several text and Facebook messages. *Sigh* Listen, there are SEVERAL things wrong with all of this, man. First, a “whoops, we killed the wrong dude” explanation is not acceptable, fam. Real talk, even if they found the right kid, NO ONE deserved to die over this, bruh! Ok, yes, I can possibly understand wanting to beat up the person responsible for leaking the video. But, all of that machete shit was WILDLY unnecessary, people!

Next, why didn’t ANYONE in the bodega call for help? I mean, they just let these dudes drag that boy out of the store! Look, I’m not saying that the store owner should’ve fought five clowns with machetes by himself. However, either him or his workers should’ve called somebody, son! For God‘s sake, that boy got butchered in their vicinity! The staff could’ve done SOMETHING, man! ANYTHING!

In the end, I don’t know what else to say, fam. Ultimately, this type of savagery is HIGHLY unfortunate and uncalled for, bruh. By and by, I’m happy that all of the suspects have been caught, folks. At the end of the day, I hope the judge throws ALL of the books at them, brethren. Frankly, these dickheads don’t deserve leniency or pity, people. LC out.

P.S. I advise everyone out there to NOT watch the video of his murder. One, I want us all to respect Junior’s life. Two, nobody really needs to witness such a brutal homicide, son. That is all.

P.P.S. Shout-out to Cardi B for donating $8,000 to the family’s GoFundMe page. Real talk, that was a super stand-up move, fam. Good day.

Long Live James Shaw Jr.!

So, I’m going to keep this post short today, son. On the real, I just want to take the time to give a shout-out to James Shaw Jr. I mean, that guy has to be the dopest dude in America right now, man. Shit, not only did he stop Travis Reinking from killing more people in a Nashville Waffle House, but he’s also raised a substantial amount of money for the families of the victims. All in all, this man should be celebrated, fam. No if, ands or buts about it, bruh.

Ok, at this point, if anyone isn’t aware of Shaw’s heroism, then shame on them, son. Basically, when Reinking decided to murder innocent people the other week, Shaw took it upon himself to act. He grabbed the burning barrel of Reinking’s rifle and wrestled it away from the killer. Essentially, by putting himself in harm’s way, Shaw saved the lives of many others. Real talk, he would have been enough of a hero if he left it there, man.

But, Shaw is way doper than that, fam. After receiving recognition for his bravery, he decided to start a GoFundMe donation. Originally, his intention was to raise $15,000 for the families of the deceased. Instead, he was able to raise upwards of $200,000, bruh. So, he saves additional people from getting hurt AND finds a way to contribute to the loved ones in need. Sheesh, how can anyone hate on this shit, son? Keeping it a buck, the world would be a MUCH better place if more people like Shaw existed.

In the end, there’s nothing else to say, man. Long live James Shaw Jr., fam! That is all. LC out.