God Bless Yung Miami & Cardi B

Disclaimer: Don’t watch City Girls’ “Twerk” video anywhere near a place of employment. You’re welcome.

So, let me keep it a buck, son. Generally, I try to be a responsible and respectable dude. I try to be a guy who’s knowledgeable about relevant and pertinent issues, man. However, for today, I’m just talking about ass, fam. I mean, it was EVERYWHERE in City Girls’ “Twerk” video, bruh! Like, all jokes aside, this might be the greatest music video ever made, people. With that being said, why is anyone still reading this?

Ok, for those who missed it, City Girls, well, Yung Miami, released the “Twerk” video with Cardi B. Now, I don’t exactly know what to say about this visual, son. Shit, there are copious amounts of women shaking all manners of culo, man. In addition, there’s a ton of body paint, stripper poles and entertaining displays of athleticism. On the real, what else could we possibly want from a video called “Twerk,” fam?

In the end, there’s nothing else to say, bruh. Ultimately, everyone needs to go watch the video, son. Also, I hope everybody paid close attention to my disclaimer. Seriously, don’t watch this shit anywhere near a place that supplies paychecks. Furthermore, don’t watch this around children or close to any clergy, man. At the end of the day, they’ll probably just start praying for wayward souls, fam. That is all. LC out.

P.S. Based on this video, Offset lost, bruh. Like, he really lost, son. *Sigh* Good day.

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We Have To Be Honest About XXXTentacion

So, I won’t lie, son. I’m fairly certain that there’s going to be a number of people upset with this post, man. But, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t keep it a buck, fam. With that being said, we all have to be honest about XXXTentacion. Now, to be clear, I’m not here to tell anybody to stop playing his songs. I mean, music has always been subjective, bruh. He might not have been my favorite artist, but that doesn’t take away from what others felt about him. In any case, we all have to call a spade a spade, brethren. On the real, XXX had a VERY problematic history with women and violence.

Ok, for those who missed it, Pitchfork just put out a damning report on XXX. Now, based on secretly recorded audio, XXX seemed to admit to a number of egregious crimes, namely the repeated assault of his ex-girlfriend. Listen, the domestic violence allegations against him aren’t new, son. Shit, I’ve mentioned these exact stories on more than one occasion. However, XXX always claimed innocence and even pleaded not guilty to the charges against him. In any case, it’s not a good look to now hear him blatantly say that he started beating his ex up after she supposedly cheated on him.

To make matters worse, that wasn’t the only crime that XXX copped to. On the tape, he also alluded to a stabbing incident that happened in Florida. Now, based on the original reports, three people were stabbed at Deerfield Beach. Instead, XXX insisted that eight people were actually cut. On top of that, he talked about slicing a former manager. All in all, this dude was on tape just admitting to all sorts of wild shit, man. The way I see it, he was a clear example of “hurt people hurt people.” Hell, he’d clearly gone through some things in life and foolishly took it out on the outside world.

In the end, I’m not here to spit on a man’s grave. But, I also feel like hero worship causes people to dilute the truth. Ultimately, XXX was a troubled fucking dude, fam. By and by, folks can’t properly tell his story without also mentioning his (clear) flaws, bruh. Regardless, he still didn’t deserve to die the way he did. At the end of the day, he was still young as fuck, son. He could’ve eventually fashioned himself into a better human being. Alas, we’ll never know, man. That is all. LC out.

P.S. Despite everything I’ve just wrote, Vic Mensa was out of line for dissing XXX during the cypher at the BET Hip Hop Awards. Look, it’s one thing to call out a person’s bad behavior, son. It’s another thing to say “we all know you won’t live that long” and speak about wanting to catch fade with DJ Akademiks at XXX’s eulogy. Nah, that’s gross, man. Listen, I’m actually a fan of Mensa’s music, but he needs to stop all of the goofy shit, fam. Just make records, bruh. Good day.

This XXXTentacion Sh*t Is Wild!

Look, let me keep it a buck, son. I’d be a hypocrite if I wrote an entire post singing XXXTentacion‘s praises, man. I mean, on this very blog, I’ve been critical of his alleged criminal behavior. However, with all of that being said, no one deserves to die the way he did, fam. Shit, XXX’s death is yet another example of why this hood shit is for the fucking birds, bruh. All in all, this type of violence needs to be COMPLETELY eradicated, brethren.

Ok, for those who missed it, XXX was killed yesterday in Miami, Florida. Apparently, he was leaving a motorcycle dealership when two men ran up on his car. Now, the rumor is these dudes were trying to rob him. Further than that, the word is the shooters made off with his Louis Vuitton bag. So, let me get this straight, son. A fucking LV bag is worth a man’s life? A 20-year-old dude? Like, think about that, man. XXX didn’t even make it to drinking age, fam. *Sigh* Dying over material possessions is the most senseless shit in the world, bruh.

Listen, I’m not going to pretend like I’m well-versed in XXX’s music. Shit, I was off that wave when I heard about his alleged crimes against women. But, I can’t front like his death didn’t throw me for a loop, son. Look, for all of his faults, he was still young as hell, man. Shit, he was young enough to make amends for his actions and improve as a human being. However, he no longer has that opportunity, fam. And for what, a bag? Money? Jewelry? Hell, NONE of that shit is worth a life, bruh. This “crabs in a barrel” mentality is among the most treacherous pitfalls in Black and Brown communities.

In the end, the lost of life is always sad, son. Ultimately, XXX didn’t deserve to die over something so petty, man. By and by, I hope all of these new artists learn from this, fam. At the end of the day, life can be short and there’s no time to waste it over frivolous behavior. In addition, there’s no room in our community for such levels of jealousy and violence. All of the bullshit has to stop, bruh. That is all. LC out.

P.S. All of these videos of folks dying need to stop being circulated, son. Good fucking Lord, let’s have some respect for people’s lives, man! At some point, idiots on social media need to quit doing shit for likes and comments, fam. All I know is, a person’s death should NEVER be used for attention-seeking and clout-chasing. Good day.

Does Donald Trump Know Puerto Rico Is Part Of America?

So, what’s the difference between Puerto Rico, Texas and Florida? I mean, all three places were battered by hurricanes. Also, all three places house American citizens. Look, whether it was Hurricane Harvey, Irma or Maria, each land was devastated by Mother Nature. So, I ask again, what’s the difference between Puerto Rico, Texas and Florida? The fact that Donald Trump doesn’t give a fuck about the citizens in Puerto Rico.

Now, for those who missed it, Trump spent this past weekend blaming Puerto Rico for their own misfortunes. Instead of commenting on the fact that fellow Americans don’t have power or running water, he talked about the land’s debt. Instead of heeding Carmen Yulín Cruz‘s pleas for help, he criticized her leadership and falsely claimed that relief efforts were great. Once again, instead of having genuine compassion for people, Trump turned another tragedy into politics.

Fam, Trump actually had the audacity to say that Puerto Rico wants everything done for them. Shit, did he say that to the Houston residents who begged Joel Osteen for shelter? Did he say that to Miami residents who watched South Beach get damn near washed away? Nah, Trump only took that tone with the Brown people, son. Look, no one can tell me that race isn’t a factor when these people need help just like any other citizen. All in all, Puerto Ricans did nothing to deserve such blatant disrespect, man.

In the end, I’m surprised that Trump can still surprise me. I mean, the lack of regard for people under his jurisdiction is staggering, fam. Then again, he’s probably like the 46% of Americans who don’t even know that Puerto Ricans are fellow citizens. *Sigh* It’s Monday morning and my head already hurts, bruh. I’m gonna go now. LC out.

The ‘Hot Water Challenge’ Needs To Stop!

Ok, can I put my dad pants on for a second? So, the other day, my wife and I had a conversation with our oldest son about the “Hot Water Challenge.” This came after we heard about what happened to 8-year-old Ki’ari Pope in Florida. Apparently, her cousin dared her to drink boiling water through a straw. From there, Pope burned her throat, got a tracheotomy, but still eventually died from respiratory issues. On the real, the fact that this little girl was only one year older than my son shook me to my core.

To make matters worse, Pope hasn’t been the only child to suffer from this outlandish challenge. More and more stories are popping up about kids doing serious damage to themselves. For instance, back in July, 10-year-old Wesley Smith of North Carolina received third degree burns after he and his stepbrother tried to get in on the movement. It seems as if they got the idea from YouTube videos. In another case, right here in the Bronx, the friends of 11-year-old Jamoneisha Merritt poured boiling water on her face while she slept. Needless to say, her face has been ravaged, man.

Now, some people may be thinking “what’s wrong with these kids?” But remember, most children have no common sense, son. Like, I did TONS of stupid shit when I was a child. For example, who told me it was a good idea to backflip off of the top of a swing, man? On the real, I’m lucky that I got out of there with only a sprained ankle. With that being said, kids feel like they’re invincible and it leads them to doing all manners of tomfoolery, fam. In any case, we as parents need to reinforce the risks of dangerous actions to our children, bruh.

In the end, even though I think this challenge is beyond dumb, I can’t really fault the kids, son. Keeping it a buck, I can’t fault the adults either, man. The fact of the matter is, being a parent is a lot of trial and error, bruh. The sad part is, in some cases, it takes tragedy for young people to learn. All I know is, as of right now, we need to tell our kids to stay far, far, faaaar away from the “Hot Water Challenge.” That is all. LC out.

A Letter To Hillary Clinton

Dear Hillary Clinton,

Look, I’m not one to mince words, so I’ll just get straight to the point. I’m going to need you to let the election go now. The fact of the matter is, you lost. Yes, we could all point to a million different factors that led to this outcome. However; as much as it pains me to say this, Donald Trump is the President. At this point, instead of rehashing your defeat, maybe you should focus on helping to prevent him from ending Western Civilization.

Now, to be fair, I did vote for you. To do this, I begrudgingly looked past your “superpredators” comment and your history with the prison industrial complex. Shit, as fucked up as your policies have been, I was/still am legitimately scared of Trump. I mean, based on what we’ve seen so far, World War III may still be on the horizon. In any case, I’ve never enjoyed picking the “lesser of two evils.” Listen, this entire election cycle has proved how antiquated the two-party political system really is.

Moving on, despite the loss, you refuse to accept any responsibility. Ok, I get it, FBI Director James Comey royally screwed you with his fuckery. The timing of his renewed investigation into your emails is suspect at best. However; that doesn’t account for the many errors you made on the campaign trail.

First, you lost Michigan, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania and Florida. These are all states that Barack Obama won twice. Twice! In fact, until you, a Democrat hadn’t lost Pennsylvania since 1988. I was 3 years old when that last occurred. To make matters worse, you didn’t campaign in Wisconsin and you only put some money down in Michigan during the last week of the election. How the fuck did you expect to win those states? In my eyes, your hubris got the best of you. You really thought you could just pull those states out of your ass with minimal effort. Well, clearly you were wrong.

Listen, I’m not ignoring the outside factors that may have contributed to your loss. Was there a gender component? Absolutely. Was there a Comey component? Absolutely. Was there a Julian Assange/WikiLeaks/Russia component? Absolutely. With that being said, take some responsibility for your own mistakes. Otherwise, you’re going to keep looking like a bitter loser. All in all, it is what it is, Mrs. Clinton. It just is what it is.

Sincerely,

A dude who’s stockpiling supplies in preparation for Armageddon

Can We Finally Talk About Homegrown Terrorists?

Now, before I say anything else, I’d like to give my regards to the families who were affected by the recent terror attack in London, England. No matter how many times these travesties happen, it’s always incredibly sad to watch. With that being said, there’s a conversation that needs to be had, man. Can we finally talk about homegrown terrorists? I mean, if we really looked at the most egregious attacks in recent years, they’ve all been perpetrated by citizens. At some point, we need to stop politicizing everything and speak on the real issues. Our own people are being radicalized and it’s destroying our respective nations.

So, when it comes to Wednesday’s incident, the horrific deed was carried out by Khalid Masood. As a recap, Masood got in his car, drove on the pavement and started running down pedestrians. Ultimately, he killed four people and injured fifty more. Now, it’s notable that Masood was born as Adrian Russell Elms in Dartford, Kent. Meaning, he was a product of the same land he just terrorized. Somewhere along the line, he got radicalized by ISIS and carried out a heinous act of violence. Apparently, even though he had a criminal record, he wasn’t under any investigation for this type of behavior.

Moving on, Masood’s act continues a dangerous trend that seems to be flying under the radar. A large number of the most despicable acts against people are being committed by natives. I mean, let’s go down the line, man. Dylann Roof, the Charleston church shooter, was born in South Carolina. Rizwan Farook, the San Bernardino shooter, was born in Illinois. Omar Mateen, the Orlando nightclub shooter, was born in New York. Alexandre Bissonnette, the Quebec mosque shooter, was French Canadian. Does anyone else see the pattern here? In all seriousness, the most vicious attacks in recent years were all committed by citizens. So, if that’s the case, why the fuck are we always talking about travel bans and border walls?!

Look, if people like Donald Trump really want to keep America safe, then we need to address our homegrown killers. On the real, a wall along the Mexican border and a Muslim Ban wouldn’t have prevented ANY of these incidents, man. So, how will they make any of us safer? I mean, it’s common fucking sense, son. We need to figure out why so many citizens are turning their backs on their countries and becoming radicals. If not, none of these ridiculous preventative measures will have any type of effect. Shit, more people will die and all we’ll do is argue about the root cause in the media. Ultimately, nothing will get accomplished, man.

In the end, these are scary times, son. The problem is, if we don’t come up with real solutions now, the times will only get scarier. Now, instead of focusing so much on what other countries are doing, can we pay attention to our own people? Ok, thanks. LC out.