Ted Koppel Is A G… Ask Sean Hannity

Man, I rock with Ted Koppel. Nah, for real, for real, I rock with Ted Koppel, son. After watching his interview with Sean Hannity on CBS Sunday Morning, I was excited to see an actual journalist deconstruct today’s media. As it currently stands, opinions have replaced facts in our news and it’s exceedingly dangerous, man. With that being said, I applaud Koppel for calling out Hannity to his face. However; Hannity and Fox News aren’t the only ones to criticize. In my eyes, MSNBCCNN and countless other “news” networks all share some of the blame. Ultimately, all opinion shows disguised as news are bad for America.

Now, I won’t lie, son, when it comes to this subject, I argue a lot with my wife and my mother. To me, I see no difference between Fox News and MSNBC. Yes, the ideology is drastically different between the two channels, but they both engage in the same brand of propaganda. All jokes aside, Bill O’Reilly and Chris Matthews are the same person, man. They both have definitive beliefs and they both refuse to listen to any guest with a conflicting point of view. Instead of acknowledging someone else’s sentiment, they’d rather just cut them off or speak over them. On the real, I challenge anyone to watch both of their shows back-to-back. Once their respective dogma is removed, it becomes apparent that their approach to “news” is strikingly similar.

Look, didn’t I just scold Rachel Maddow on this very site for engaging in the tomfoolery? I mean, she took two pages of Donald Trump‘s 2005 tax return and spun an entire story out of nothing. Outside of quoting how much money he made and how much he paid in taxes, Maddow had no other spec of news to report. She just launched a series of hypotheticals that were designed to create an unproven narrative in the audience’s mind. *Sigh* I just want the damn news, son! Can I get that without someone trying to shape how I’m supposed to interpret it?

Moving on, I just want to make one thing clear. Is my blog based on my own personal point of view? Absolutely. With that being said, I’m not a journalist, man. I’m just a dude with an opinion and immaculate WiFi, son. I’m simply out here reacting to the world as it happens. We, the people, need the media to tell us the unbiased truth. That’s the only way we can truly make sense of everything. All I know is, I’m a firm believer that opinion-based media is largely responsible for the division in our country. The public can’t come together when information is always being spun and misrepresented.

In the end, Ted Koppel is a G, man. He’s one of the few who’s able to call a spade a spade. Now, if more journalists took this stance on the news, then maybe we’d actually have a shot of figuring out what’s really going on out here. But, then again, in the words of Desus Nice, by Bronx bredren, facts don’t matter. LC out.

P.S. This is very random, but shout-out to Ghostface Killah, son. Look, the entire time I was writing this post, I kept hearing the line “hit mics like Ted Koppel” in my head. With that being said, everyone should go listen to “Mighty Healthy” after reading this. That is all.

What In God’s Name Are ‘Alternative Facts’?

So, I would like to welcome everybody back to the Twilight Zone. This is a place where the newly sworn-in President of the United States makes his Press Secretary argue with the media about inauguration attendance. This is also a place where the President’s Senior Adviser gets on NATIONAL TELEVISION and speaks about “alternative facts.” Son, what fucking planet are we living on right now? Outside of the fact that Donald Trump’s administration is already spreading egregious falsehoods, we’re also witnessing something extremely dangerous. Trump is essentially trying to set up an America where no one can question his moves. Shit, our country is already starting to look like Communist Russia, man. Everyone needs to get ready.

First off, let’s start with Sean Spicer, son. Out of all of the things the new Press Secretary could’ve talked about in his first press conference, he decided to speak on inauguration numbers. Once the Trump administration got wind of the fact that the media was ACCURATELY reporting how many people showed up to the event, Trump’s goons went on the offensive. It’s now widely known that the crowd size for Trump’s inauguration paled in comparison to both of Barack Obama’s inaugurations. However; in the grand scheme of things, none of this actually matters, son. Trump is still the President, regardless of how many people came to Washington, D.C. to celebrate. With that being said, Trump STILL sent Spicer to the podium to argue about how many people came to the party. Spicer even said that Trump had “the largest audience to ever witness an inauguration, period.” I mean, as we can clearly tell, facts don’t matter, son (word to Desus Nice). C’mon son, who’s got time for evidence and proof in the first place, right?

Next, let’s talk about Kellyanne Conway. In the wake of Spicer’s meltdown, the new Senior Adviser decided to plead her team’s case on Meet the Press with Chuck Todd. Now, when Todd confronted Conway about the tomfoolery of Spicer’s press conference, she gave one of the most confusing rebuttals I’ve ever heard in my entire life. While speaking about Spicer’s BLATANTLY inaccurate statements, Conway said that he was just presenting “alternative facts.” Alternative facts? What? What?! WHAT?!? Good fucking Lord, son! Is that what we’re doing now? Instead of just saying that someone lied, we’re saying that they’ve provided alternative facts? Shit, can that defense be used in court? If my wife caught me cheating, could I tell her that I was just helping the other woman verify if her birth control worked? I mean, those are alternative facts, right? What the fuck are we talking about here? How is this acceptable, man? We really have to deal with these exorbitant lies for the next four years? Who will survive in America, son?

Look, all jokes aside, we’re in a bad place right now. Trump’s administration is already setting the stage to eliminate all dissenting voices. They’re trying to regulate everyone’s narrative and attack anyone who dares to say something different. Even when individuals have FACTS on their side, Trump is using officials as a weapon to intimidate anyone who opposes him. I know there’s been a lot of talk about Trump’s relationship with Vladimir Putin, but controlling the media is ACTUALLY something that Putin does. Our country is already being turned into Mother Russia, son. At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if Trump somehow made it illegal to say anything against him. These are truly scary times, man. Scary times indeed.

In the end, I don’t know, son. I still can’t believe this is our reality, man. I’d like to thank the Swing States for destroying America. When World War III occurs and those folks are laying in a sea of rubble, I hope they know they probably won’t have any healthcare to help them out. Dumbasses. I’m gone.