Kevin Hart Is Having A Bad Month

So, let’s just skip the formalities and get straight to the shits, son. On the real, Kevin Hart is having a bad month, man. First, there’s the car crash. Now, regardless of speculation, here’s what’s being reported. Apparently, a dude named Jared Black was driving Hart’s 1970 Plymouth Barracuda and rolled into a ditch. The story is, Hart and Black were injured in the crash, but Rebecca Broxterman, the third passenger and Eniko Hart‘s personal trainer, was not hospitalized. Anyway, that would be enough to sit out the rest of September. However, Montia Sabbag had a different plan in mind, fam.

Ok, for those who are unfamiliar, Sabbag is the woman that Hart was smashing on candid camera two years ago. Now, at first, she blamed Jonathan Todd Jackson for the entire ordeal. For reference, Jackson is an actor and former friend of Hart’s who tried to swindle Hart for money to retrieve the recording. In any case, back then, Sabbag stated that Hart was a victim like her. All I know is, something must’ve changed in her mind, son.

Moving on, Sabbag, with the “help” of Lisa Bloom, has decided to sue Hart for $60 million. Now, according to Sabbag, Hart conspired with Jackson to record her in order to gain publicity for Hart’s Irresponsible Tour. All I can say is, that’s literally the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my life, man. Like, is she serious, fam? Does she really believe that Kevin Hart, the most famous comedian in the world, needs a hotel sex tape to promote his tour? Real talk, the level of delusional is unprecedented, bruh.

Listen, let me be clear, son. In my eyes, Sabbag has every right to feel like her privacy was invaded. Frankly, no one deserves to have their intimate moments filmed without their consent. But, the idea that Hart needed extra publicity is nonsensical, man. As I stated before, he’s literally the most famous comedian on the planet. Shit, it doesn’t matter if people find him funny or not. The fact is, Kevin Hart is one of the most recognizable celebrities on Earth. There is literally NOTHING Sabbag could do or say to make him more famous than he already is. If anything, we looked at Hart like a cotdamn idiot for getting caught out there, again. At this point, Bloom needs to tell her client to sit the fuckity-fuck down, fam.

In the end, Montia Sabbag needs to knock it off, bruh. Ultimately, this lawsuit is nothing more than an obvious money-grab, son. By and by, people were going to see Kevin Hart’s tour with or without footage of his hotel sex-capades. At the end of the day, Sabbag’s 15 minutes are over, man. Just let it go, ma’am. Just let it go. That is all. LC out.

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Kevin Hart Is Out Here Looking CRAZY!

So, I’m going to just get straight to the point, son. Kevin Hart is taking a LOT of L’s right now, man. I mean, these groupies got him out here looking CRAZY, fam! Shit, not only did he get caught creeping on his wife, Eniko Hart, but now, the word is that the side chicks tried to extort him. Good Lord, life comes at folks FAST, bruh! In any case, they say “what goes around comes around,” so karma might be dancing on his ass right now.

Now, before I continue, let me get one thing out of the way. Keeping it a buck, I’m the LAST human being on Earth who can judge anyone for cheating. Anyway, I would divulge further, but this post ain’t about me, son! With that being said, Kevin Hart is no stranger to cheating rumors, man. Look, if anyone has ever watched his stand-ups, they’d hear him talk about what led to the breakup of his first marriage. Frankly, he made a habit out of cheating on Torrei Hart and ended up telling some jokes about it. All in all, I laughed, fam. Listen, the dude is funny, bruh!

Moving on, even his current relationship with Eniko has had its bumps and bruises. To that point, all I’ll say is, they started dating in 2009, but his divorce from Torrei wasn’t finalized until 2011. So, I’ll just let the people do the math on that one. Now, to add insult to injury, this new cheating scandal comes up. Based on the video going around, he was in some room smashing two women while his pregnant wife was at home. Sheesh, the optics on this look TERRIBLE, fam! By and by, it seems as if he admitted to everything on Instagram in an attempt to thwart the women’s extortion plot. In addition, the FBI is now looking into his case. Man, this story just keeps on getting wilder, bruh!

In the end, all of this will probably blow over, son. I mean, if his wife stays with him and he doesn’t ante up any money to these side chicks, then he doesn’t really lose here. Ultimately, the internet will have a ton of jokes, but it probably won’t hurt him, man. By and by, he only has two options from here: either stop cheating on Eniko or find some better prospects, fam. Real talk, the former is probably the better idea here. LC out.

P.S. I’m sure Torrei feels somewhat vindicated at the moment. However; she needs to stop doing interviews, son. I mean, we all know the history, ma’am. There’s really no need to sling mud right now, man. On the real, she’s doing herself a disservice by getting down in the dirt. In my eyes, doing press makes it look like she’s not over her divorce. If she’s really happy, then just be happy and let Eniko deal with Kevin’s fuckery. That is all.