‘Fled Cruz’ Is Hilarious

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, the internet never ceases to be funny, man. I mean, no matter the situation, the online community will find a way to make shit hilarious. With that being said, the name “Fled Cruz” is a special brand of comical. Like, on what planet did Ted Cruz think it was cool to ditch Texas during the middle of a crisis? Shit, after his role in fanning the flames of the U.S. Capitol riot, one would think that Cruz would try to be as helpful as possible. But, nope, brethren. Instead, Cruz tried to bounce with his family and really thought that people wouldn’t notice. All in all, he’s a certified clown, fam.

Ok, for those who are unaware, Texas is a shit-show right now. Thanks to climate change, the state has been battered with unprecedented amounts of snow and ice. Because of this, millions of people are residing in frozen houses that are without power. To clarify, the motherfucking Texas power grid just gave up, bruh. Furthermore, because of these extraordinary times, resources such as food and water are becoming an issue for residents. So, during a moment like this, what should the community expect from its elected officials? They should be finding ways to rectify the power issues and get supplies to the people, right? Well, that’s not what Ted Cruz did. In fact, to get away from the problems of his fellow Texans, Cruz hopped on a plane with his family to Cancún, Mexico. *Sigh* He’s such a great Senator, son.

Now, here’s the thing. The fact is, Cruz can’t pretend like this was some planned trip. Based on leaked text messages, his wife, Heidi Cruz, put this vacation in motion because their “house is FREEZING.” Well, welcome to the club, Heidi. Frankly, all of her father’s constituents are in the same boat and a lot of them don’t have the ability to flee the scene. Keeping it a buck, how dense can one man be, fam? Like, did he really think this was a good idea? To abandon the people who voted for him? For God‘s sake, Ted Cruz continually shows us that he’s of low character. Hell, I guess promoting a riot wasn’t bad enough. Now he wants to take the easy way out while his people suffer. Bravo, fool.

In the end, there’s nothing else to say, son. Ultimately, I’m not surprised by Cruz’ ain’t-shit-ness. By and by, these politicians just continue to show us that they don’t give a fuck about the people. At the end of the day, we get what we vote for. That is all. LC out.

The Truth About The Amazon Rainforest

*Sigh* On the real, I don’t even know where to begin, son. The fact is, human beings are basically parasites to the Earth, man. I mean, whatever we could possibly do to destroy our planet, we find a way to do it, fam. Now, despite a shocking lack of news coverage, we need to talk about the Amazon Rainforest. All in all, the world’s premier rainforest is being decimated and we need to do something about it ASAP.

Ok, before I continue, let me advise some of my social media kinfolk. Listen, people, some of the images that are being spread around on FacebookTwitter and Instagram are misleading, bruh. Like, yes, fires on the Brazil side of the rainforest are 80% higher this year than last year. However, some of the pictures floating around are either old or from a completely different place. So, folks need to be mindful of the information they’re spreading, son.

With all of that being said, we still have a major fucking problem, man. The truth is, millions upon millions of acres are being destroyed and the global impact will be massive, fam. Look, the trees in the Amazon Rainforest are responsible for about 20% of the world’s oxygen. Shit, let me say that again, bruh. THE TREES IN THE AMAZON RAINFOREST ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ABOUT 20% OF THE WORLD’S OXYGEN! In addition, the rainforest puts loads of water into the atmosphere. Needless to say, we need that shit, son! However, our incessant need for farmland is literally killing the rainforest.

Now, if we’re being real, Brazil is a HUGE part of the fuckery, man. Listen, they make a ton of money off of cattle ranching. So, to further their business, they’re actually (illegally) burning down large portions of the rainforest. Keep in mind, cows are the cause for large amounts of greenhouse gas emissions like methane and carbon dioxide. In layman’s terms, Brazil is cutting off our oxygen while putting harmful shit in our atmosphere. For God‘s sake, there is absolutely NOTHING people won’t do for money, fam.

In the end, I don’t know what else to say, bruh. Ultimately, we’re killing the fucking planet and none of our governments seem to care, son. At the end of the day, this is why a phrase like “money is the root of all evil” exists, man. Hell, we’ll blatantly do shit that’s detrimental to our future as long as we can make a profit from it. In my eyes, none of that shit is worth it, fam. Before it’s all said and done, we might not have a planet left, brethren. That is all. LC out.