So, before I even begin, let me just say that “The Box” by Roddy Ricch is my SHIT, son. I mean, from the Justin Timberlake/Ciara sample to the “eee ooo” to the idea of Cash App‘ing a chick for soul removal, the entire record works, man. With that being said, I’m super glad that Roddy kept Justin Bieber from going #1, fam. All in all, the goofy shit has to stop, bruh.
Ok, for those who missed it, Bieber also released some new music. Now, after a temporary break, Bieber came back to the scene with this “Yummy” record. From there, he gave his fans a bunch of instructions on how to make the song go #1 on the Billboard Hot 100. Hell, fans had to download some shit, let it play all night, sacrifice a chicken AND solve for X, son. The point is, there was NOTHING organic about how Bieber was trying to play the game, man.
Now, to be fair, Bieber didn’t invent this strategy, fam. Shit, for a few albums now, I’ve seen Chris Brown do the same thing, bruh. However, I thought it was doofy when he did it too. Like, I understand that this is the music business and it’s a numbers-driven racket, but c’mon son. Real talk, if the record is that dope, the fans will flock to it, brethren. I mean, that’s EXACTLY what happened with Roddy Ricch. WE loved the record and that’s why it’s a hit right now, folks. Frankly, it’s hilarious that Bieber did all of this work just to come in second, people.
The fact of the matter is, Roddy put out a better song and the masses championed it. Side note, I’m 34 years old and had my first taste of vagina in 1997. All I know is, I’ve NEVER called it “that yummy.” Who the fuck did Bieber make that song for, son? People who’ve never had box themselves (pun intended)? Anyway, I appreciated the fact that Roddy shaded Bieber by telling fans to go stream “Yummy.” The fact is, Bieber was CLEARLY salty that his algorithm of steps didn’t work, man.
In the end, I wouldn’t be sad if I never heard “Yummy” again. But, I’m legitimately playing “The Box” as I write this, fam. Ultimately, the fans beat the algorithm, bruh. By and by, Bieber should just worry about making a better song and not trying to outsmart the system. That is all. LC out.
P.S. Despite the tone of this post, I actually fucks with some of Bieber’s music, son. On the real, both Journals and Purpose have bangers on them. Keeping it a buck, “Yummy” just wasn’t it, man. It happens, fam. Just go back to the drawing board and come out with some heat, bruh. Good day.