Disclaimer: This post is an unabashed Rihanna love fest. Haters will be handled with swift and vengeful justice.
So, let me keep it a buck, son. I was in love with the Rihanna in the first picture. I was in love with the Rihanna in the second picture. I was also in love with the Rihanna in the third picture. However; the Rihanna in that fourth picture can’t be measured by Earthly science or mathematics, man. I mean, Thick Rihanna is the greatest all of time, fam. Hands down. Frankly, I don’t want to hear any debates, people. Let’s just all praise whatever food Ms. Fenty has been eating, bruh.
Now, for those who missed it, Barbados‘ Crop Over festival just went down. As a man who’s half Bajan and half Vincentian, this festival means a lot to my culture. With that being said, Rihanna, a born and bred Bajan, has always frequented the celebration. Meaning, she’s always been decked out in the finest of costumes. However; the way she looked this year made me make the Carmelo Anthony “risk it all” face, son. Like, her newfound thickness is a sight for sore eyes, man. Shit, she almost made me forget that the American government is in shambles, fam.
To be fair, the internet has been talking about Rih Rih’s weight gain for a little while now. On the real, social media has debated whether she’s fine, fat or something in between. All I know is, fuck anybody who doesn’t appreciate what Robyn is blessing us with, son! Look, even Chris Brown rose up from the abyss to start liking pictures, man. Listen, the curves are just undeniable, folks. All in all, I can’t critique anything she’s doing, bruh.
In the end, there’s nothing else to be said, son. Let’s just all do a praise dance in honor of Thick Rihanna. Lastly, to the rest of my congregation, feel free to enjoy the pictures below. Thanks a lot, Baby Jesus! LC out.