So… Jeffrey Epstein Committed ‘Suicide’

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, this is one of those days where I have to get into my conspiracy bag, man. I mean, this Jeffrey Epstein situation is haaaaard for me to believe, fam. Like, after everything that’s transpired, his “suicide” looks fishy as fuck, bruh. All in all, he very well may have killed himself. However, I’m sorry if me, and tons of others, are out here calling shenanigans.

Ok, for those who missed it, accused pedophile Epstein was found dead on Saturday from a supposed suicide. Now, after a previous “suicide attempt” on July 23rd, Epstein was placed on suicide watch. Meaning, he was supposed to be closely monitored and checked on every 30 minutes. Instead, during the moment he “hung himself,” the two guards in charge didn’t check on him for hours. So, during this time period, Epstein “took his own life.”

Now, let me be real, son. Look, I’m putting so many phrases in quotations because this story is super shady, man. Shit, here we have a dude who allegedly ran a sex trafficking ring. On top of that, he had notable ties to Donald Trump, Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton. In addition, accusers have stated that Epstein and a former love interest, Ghislaine Maxwell, passed them around to high-profile individuals like Prince AndrewBill Richardson and George Mitchell. Furthermore, Epstein previously tried to off himself while in detention. So, after all of that, the authorities STILL left him alone long enough for him to kill himself? Nah, fam, I don’t know if I’m rolling with that story.

The way I see it, Epstein knew waaaaay too much, bruh. Hell, how many sick ass people could he take down if he started flapping his gums, son? Now, there is a legitimate possibility that he committed suicide, man. Frankly, I don’t know shit about shit, fam. All I’m saying is, this scenario is just a little bit too convenient, bruh. Listen, given his connection to so many different factions, it’s highly suspicious that he would die like this in federal custody, brethren. So, I’m going to need a lot more facts here, people.

In the end, no one will miss Jeffrey Epstein. Ultimately, I just hope that his death won’t prevent other dirtbags from seeing justice. By and by, everyone in his circumference needs to be taken down, son. At the end of the day, anyone who hurts children doesn’t deserve humanity, man. So, I hope the authorities round up all of these assholes, fam. That is all. LC out.

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Jeffrey Epstein’s Crimes Are Being Politicized

So, here we are, son. Yet another example of why I vehemently hate politics, man. I mean, journalists, pundits and elected officials have the uncanny ability to turn ANYTHING into a political shit-show. All I know is, I’m fucking disgusted right now, fam. Seriously, anyone trying to turn this Jeffrey Epstein shit into a partisan issue is the scum of the Earth, bruh. The way I see it, this situation is WAY bigger than some Democrat and Republican tomfoolery, people.

Now, before I continue, let me layout all of the despicable things that Epstein has been accused of, son. Ok, for those who are unaware, Epstein is a financier who manages the assets of wealthy individuals. Now, a lot of news outlets have called him a billionaire, but Forbes thinks it’s all shenanigans, man. Shit, he could be, but since his client list is secret, there’s no way to properly determine his wealth, fam. In any case, Epstein is on the hook for an alleged sex-trafficking ring, bruh. Essentially, the authorities believe that Epstein is out here abusing scores of underage girls. Apparently, he’s been violating girls for years and making them recruit more girls for him.

Moving on, since the alleged behavior has been going on for years, everyone wants to know if his associates had any idea about him. The problem is, his associates include Donald Trump and Bill Clinton. Now, because of this, the Right and the Left have been slinging accusations at their respective representatives. Hell, Fox News is trying their hardest to include Clinton in Epstein’s mess and newspapers like The Washington Post are heightening the link between Trump and Epstein. The fact is, both men had a relationship with this sicko.

Look, regardless of what both sides want to say, both Trump and Clinton had numerous interactions with Epstein. Like, Clinton has flown on Epstein’s plane on more than one occasion. Side bar, Epstein’s plane was called the Lolita Express, son. For God‘s sake, the idiot wasn’t even trying to hide his debauchery, man. On the real, something is seriously wrong with that dude, fam. Anyway, Trump hung with Epstein at his Mar-a-Lago Club on numerous occasions. In addition, Trump once called Epstein a “terrific guy” who “likes beautiful women as much as [he does], and many of them are on the younger side.” Bruh, I couldn’t make this shit up! All in all, it seems like everybody knew EXACTLY who Epstein was/is.

All I can say is, the last thing this story needs is a political spin, son. In my eyes, if any of these fuckers knew what Epstein was up to, then they all need to be strung up, man. Real talk, I don’t give a fuck what party any of these people belong to. Frankly, when little girls are being abused, anyone knowledgeable needs to hang, fam. To me, the fact that I need to even say that shows how far gone this country is, bruh. At the end of the day, there are things in this life that are WAY bigger than political affiliations, brethren. The safety of underage girls is one of them.

In the end, I hope they throw all of the proverbial books at Epstein, son. Ultimately, this man is a sex offender who continued to hurt girls, man. By and by, his fate should be sealed, fam. From there, anybody else who knew about his dastardly deeds should pay too, bruh. If it’s Donald Trump, then so be it. If it’s Bill Clinton, then so be it. Neither one of those men should be bigger than justice, folks. Then again, I’m not naïve, people. The powers that be would never let those men fall. *Sigh* That is all. LC out.

Donald Trump’s Guide To Getting Women

Now, let’s be real for a second, son. Of COURSE I’m talking about Donald Trump today. I mean, did anybody really think I was going to let his latest batch of tomfoolery slide? On the real, how can anyone who breathes air endorse this guy? How can anyone who breathes air BE this guy?! Every time I think it’s impossible to top the copious amounts of insanity he’s said, some new shit comes out. With that being said, let’s talk about Trump’s most recent philosophies about women.

Look, to start, I’m not going to spend too much time on last night’s debate. It was exactly what I thought it would be: a pure shitshow. Instead of being on the defensive, Trump came out swinging, launching a bunch of accusations at not only Hillary Clinton, but Bill Clinton as well. Even before the debate, Trump held a press conference with four women who claimed to either be sexually assaulted by the former president or wronged by Hillary. In any case, the debate devolved into one of the ugliest spectacles I’ve ever seen, which is exactly what Trump and company wanted.

So, why was Trump so desperate to create a distraction? Because of a video that surfaced over the weekend of an outrageous conversation he had with Billy Bush in 2005. While on the set of “Access Hollywood,” Trump was recorded speaking about how he approaches attractive women. Apparently, in his world, it’s perfectly ok to “just start kissing” women and “[grabbing] them by the pussy.” To him, these are appropriate actions because celebrities can essentially do whatever they want. Now, I don’t have to speculate about his mentality because he literally said “when you’re a star… you can do anything.” That’s actually a statement that came out of his mouth, son. Honestly, “flabbergasted” isn’t even a strong enough word to describe my reaction, man.

Now, as expected, all of the people who heard these remarks were as taken aback as I was. The outrage even extended to Trump’s own party. So far, he’s been condemned by Paul Ryan, Reince Priebus, Mitt Romney, John McCain, Jeb Bush and myriad of GOP faithful who were appalled by Trump’s words. In addition, a number of Republicans have even demanded that Trump drop out of the presidential race. However; we all know Trump would never do that. Quitting has never been the man’s style.

Moving on, according to him and his campaign, his comments were nothing more than “locker room talk.” Apparently, this is the way men talk behind closed doors. Come the fuck on, son! Last time I checked, I’ve been a man my entire life and I’ve NEVER participated in a conversation like this! When it comes to the men I know, we talk about what we would do if we had the opportunity to get down with a chick. But we NEVER endorse sexual assault, man! Nowhere in Trump’s statements did he speak about consent. In actuality, he said he does things because he knows he can get away with them. Bruh, that’s textbook rape. At this point, anyone who disagrees is advocating violence against women. Plain and simple. On the real, the same men who consider this “locker room talk” are probably the same men who sympathize with Brock Turner, Austin Wilkerson and David Becker.

In the end, the scariest part of this is, after last night’s debate, Trump’s constituents will probably still continue to support him. Based on some early reviews of his performance, he’s been getting positive feedback for seemingly pushing Hillary against the ropes. All of this proves that morals are an obsolete idea. Party unity is more important to everyone than having an actual belief system. With that being said, voting is still vital. I know I’ve said that a number of times on this site, but I can’t stress this enough, man. This November‘s election is of the utmost importance. Everyone needs to use their voice. Good day.

P.S. Does anyone else find it sexist that Bill’s alleged misconduct is always brought up to smite Hillary? SHE’S the one running for president right now, not Bill! If the jabs have nothing to do with her directly, keep them out of this race. She shouldn’t have to suffer for what her husband may or may not have done. That is all.

‘No F*cks Given’: The Legend Of Colin Powell

To be clear, I hate politics, son. I talk about it a lot, but I hate everything about politics. I hate the blind allegiances to partisan ideals and I hate the fact politicians don’t really represent the people’s interests. However; more so than anything else, I despise knowing that politicians never keep it real with the general public. Whether it’s overbearing political correctness or straight up lies, our elected officials seem to have no idea what honesty is. With all of that being said, I’d like to personally thank whoever hacked Colin Powell’s emails, man. This is mainly because, for once, we got a politician’s true opinion about the world around them.

Skipping the formalities, Powell’s emails were full of hot takes about Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. Needless to say, he’s not onboard with either of these people becoming president. Taking it a step further, he actually listed several reasons why both individuals are essentially pieces of basura caliente. First, in regards to Trump, Powell stated that he was a “national disgrace” and an “international pariah.” In addition, he called the “birther movement” Trump started “racist” and claimed most folks actually hate him. All I know is, I can’t find one single lie in homie’s logic, bro. I’ll never understand why he chose to be a Republican, but as a fellow West Indian from the Bronx, I’m fully in tune with the “no fucks given” way of life.

Moving on, Powell actually saved all of his hottest takes for Hillary. To be real, he hit her with that Ether, son. He hit her with that shit to make her soul burn slow, man. Despite calling her a friend, he laid out a number of reasons why he wouldn’t vote for her either. In his eyes, Hillary is nothing more than a person who has a distinguished history of being greedy, letting ambition blind her and allowing hubris to ruin everything she touches. Furthermore, he brings up the idea that good ol’ Bill Clinton is still out here laying the wood to these broads in their house. Side bar, to all of my feminists out there, I know Bill’s transgressions shouldn’t be allowed to have an effect on her campaign, but let’s be real, most of politics is perception. In any case, Powell has all of the guns loaded and he’s firing shots in every direction, son. I can’t lie, this is simultaneously beautiful and hilarious to watch.

Ultimately, I don’t know how or if his words will have any effect on the election. While they probably won’t, I can’t help but feel satisfied seeing a politician’s unbridled honesty. Now, while these words were never meant for public eyes, at least we know that people in his position realize this entire election is fucked. Both candidates suck and everyone knows, man. Good luck to America, son. Good luck indeed.