What The F*ck Was LiAngelo Ball Thinking?

Disclaimer: Everything is alleged, but that’s not going to stop me from giving out this work, son. Ok, let’s carry on, man.

Look, let me begin this post by saying that I know what’s it’s like to be an 18-year-old idiot. I know what it’s like to do dumb shit thinking I could never get caught. Shit, if I’m being real, I don’t think I stopped engaging in regular fuckery until I was like 25 years old, son. By then, I was someone’s dad, so something had to give, man. With that being said, a part of me wants to go easy on LiAngelo Ball. However; when we consider all of the perks of being part of the Ball family right now, LiAngelo is looking like a plum fool, fam. Listen, at the end of the day, don’t do anything to fuck up the money, bruh!

Ok, for those who missed it, the UCLA men’s basketball team is currently in China. Now, when it comes to athletes, especially male athletes, a certain level of tomfoolery is expected. However; Ball, Cody Riley and Jalen Hill just got themselves into some real shit, son. Just yesterday, they were arrested for stealing sunglasses from a Louis Vuitton store. To make matters worse, if these dudes are convicted of a crime, they could face 3-10 years in prison, man. *Sigh* Was any of this shit worth it, fam?

Listen, let’s be honest for a second, bruh. As of right now, it’s a damn privilege to be part of the Ball family. Between Lonzo Ball’s skill set and LaVar Ball’s insanity, they have laid the foundation for a lucrative self-contained business. Hell, with LaMelo Ball also waiting in the wings, the Ball family could keep the money train rolling for a good period of time, son. So, why would LiAngelo jeopardize any of this for a pair of sunglasses, man? Yeah, maybe I’m being a little harsh, but when dealing with millions, EVERYONE has to keep their eyes on the prize, fam.

In the end, I hope China lets these dudes skate, bruh. Ultimately, serving major prison time over some shit like this would be crazy, folks. In any case, I hope LiAngelo learns a valuable lesson from this: DON’T FUCK UP THE MONEY, SON! All in all, one pair of sunglasses isn’t worth a lifetime of earning potential, man. That is all. LC out.

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Damn, Meek Mill

So, Meek Mill is in a world of shit right now, son. I mean, there’s no way else to cut it or slice it, man. On Monday, Meek appeared in court to face the music for violating his probation. Now, even though the prosecutors recommended no jail time, Judge Genece E. Brinkley had a different plan in mind. After overseeing Meek’s case from its inception, she appeared to be over all of the shenanigans. With that being said, she sentenced Meek to 2-4 years in prison as punishment. Damn, Meek Mill.

Ok, so the question is, how did he get here? Now, while I do think the sentence is harsh, Meek didn’t make any of this shit easy on himself. Listen, if we’re keeping it a buck here, he was constantly getting into some type of tomfoolery. Look, I see several news sources pointing to his recent arrests being the culprit. But, that’s only half of the story, fam. In reality, there were more underlying factors that contributed to Meek’s situation. Shit, let’s go through some of them, bruh.

First, he was arrested back in March for a fight at a St. Louis airport. To be fair, those charges were dropped, son. Then, he pleaded guilty to reckless driving in October after he recorded himself riding a dirt bike here in New York. Look, as a lifelong NYC native, I could’ve told him that was a bad idea, man. The NYPD has a strong disdain for bikes in this city. On top of that, he kept doing shows outside of Philadelphia, even though the judge specifically told him not to. Frankly, Meek and his team made it easy to helm him up, fam.

Now, with all of that being said, does he deserve 4 years in prison? Nah, I’m not co-signing that shit, bruh. However; we can’t front like he didn’t put himself in a bad spot, son. On the real, if I knew I had a judge like Brinkley, I would sit my ass down, man. Look, there’s no need to end up on the wrong side of the law if it could be avoided, fam. All in all, there’s already enough of us in prison, bruh. There’s truly no need to add to the numbers, folks. Especially not over some dumb shit, people.

In the end, this shit is wack because I’m actually a Meek Mill fan. Real talk, he’s never dropped a bad project, son. Ok, yeah, people had jokes during the Drake debacle and the breakup with Nicki Minaj. However; the music never suffered, man. Ultimately, I’m going to be playing Dreams Worth More Than Money, Dreamchasers 4 and Wins & Losses at ignorant levels, fam. *Sigh* He was on a fucking streak before this shit happened, bruh. By and by, that’s all we’ve got until he’s free again. LC out.

The REAL Faces Of Terror

Disclaimer: This post is probably going to piss some people off, son. Tough shit, man.

Look, I’m going to just get straight to the point, fam. When it comes to terrorism in America, radical Muslims aren’t our biggest threat. Now, if we’re keeping it a buck here, there’s one group who’s a larger problem than anyone else: White men. Listen, I know a lot of people are going to take this post the wrong way, but the numbers don’t lie, bruh. Since 9/11, WAY more Americans have been killed by White men than Islamic extremists. All in all, THIS is the REAL face of terror, folks!

Ok, before I continue, let me make one thing clear: radical Islamic terrorists are a real problem. Now, I don’t want to make it sound like I don’t believe that groups like ISIS and al-Qaeda are a problem. With that being said, they don’t cause NEARLY as many issues in the United States as politicians would have us believe. Shit, even when it comes to extremist-related attacks, a good number of the perpetrators are U.S. citizens. In addition, even when they’re not citizens, none of them come from the countries on Donald Trump’s Muslim Ban. So, what terror is he preventing exactly?

So, I was compelled to write this post after the tragedy in Sutherland Springs, Texas. Just yesterday, 26-year-old Devin Patrick Kelley opened fire at First Baptist Church. In the wake of the carnage, 26 people were killed, including the pastor’s daughter. Now, once his mayhem had subsided, he was found dead in his vehicle, seemingly from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. As of now, we have no idea what his motive was. However; history tells us that he was a piece of shit.

Now, based on recently-released information, Kelley was a bad seed through and through. During his time in the Air Force, he was court-martialed for beating up his wife and his child. He ended up serving a year in a military prison and was subsequently dishonorably discharged. Furthermore, he wasn’t allowed to own any weapons but still descended upon the people in that church with an assault rifle. *Sigh* Man, half of the parishioners are dead and we have NO clue why, son.

Moving on, I don’t want to turn this into a political debate, but Trump truly makes my blood boil, man. He couldn’t WAIT to call Sayfullo Saipov an “animal,” but had no such words for Kelley. Instead, he chalked it all up to a “mental health” issue and refused to comment on gun control. Well, if it’s “too early” to talk about gun reform, then why isn’t it too early to talk about mental health? Let’s be real, Trump doesn’t know anything about this man, fam. So, how does he know whether or not he’s crazy? Bruh, get the flying fuck outta here!

In the end, I just want this country to be honest with itself, son. Devin Patrick Kelley is a terrorist, man. Stephen Paddock is a terrorist, fam. Ultimately, Americans have a higher probability of running into them than an Islamic extremist. By and by, until we come to grips with these facts, people are going to keep on dying, bruh. All I can say, Rest In Peace to all of the innocent people who lost their lives. LC out.

B.o.B Is The Dumbest Man Alive

All jokes aside, how many dumb ideas can one dude have, son? Look, in my eyes, everyone has to pick a thing, man. Like, we all should only be allowed to have one ridiculous belief, fam. For me, I believe The Rolling Stones are better than The Beatles, bruh. Yes, I know some people may think I’m insane, but no one can convince me otherwise. With that being said, rapper B.o.B is DETERMINED to have the most preposterous ideas, folks. First, he claimed that the Earth was flat. Shit, he even got into a beef with Neil deGrasse Tyson about it. Now, he’s claiming that slavery never existed in America. All in all, this clown can’t be fucking serious, people.

Ok, as I stated in the previous paragraph, Bobby Ray is alleging that slavery didn’t happen in America. So, he posted some bullshit on his Instagram page and proudly proclaimed that there was no slavery in his DNA. Furthermore, he wondered why we could find dinosaur bones but couldn’t find any slave ships. Now, outside of the fact that he’s insane, his fuckery bothers me for another reason, son. Look, if this clowncake did even the SMALLEST amount of research, he’d know that everything he’s stated has already been debunked. With that being said, let’s start with slave ships, man.

Now, in Washington, D.C., there’s a little Smithsonian museum called the National Museum of African American History and Culture. Essentially, this museum chronicles the entire history of Black people in the United States. Please note, I’ve written about this exact place on my blog before. Meaning, the virtues of this building have already been added to the zeitgeist. In any case, this museum has tons of valuable items on display, such as artifacts from slave ships that B.o.B claims don’t exist. As it stands, anybody can go to D.C. right now and see remnants of the São José Paquete Africa, a slave ship from Portugal.

Moving on, what confuses me even more is the fact that B.o.B is from the South. I mean, he can go to a bunch of different states and see a preserved plantation right this moment, fam. At the end of the day, there are millions of conspiracies, bruh. However; the existence of slavery isn’t one of them, folks. It just is what it is, people.

In the end, I don’t want to hear any more tomfoolery from B.o.B, son. At this point, I only need him to do one thing, man: give me Sevyn Streeter’s number, fam. I mean, that woman is fine as fuckity-fuck, bruh! In any case, Bobby needs to leave the happy dust alone and go back to making music that people actually care about. Keeping it a buck, he hasn’t really done that in a number of years, folks. LC out.

Kevin Spacey Came Out In The Worst Way Possible

So, I really want to know what kind of world we live in, son. Like, when did coming out as gay make up for pedophilia, man? On the real, that’s the shit that Kevin Spacey just tried to pull, fam. To make matters worse, the media paid more attention to Spacey’s announcement than Anthony Rapp’s original story, bruh. All in all, let’s not confuse one thing for another, folks. When in comes to Rapp, Spacey was nothing more than a predator, people.

Ok, for those who missed it, Anthony Rapp recently alleged some wild shit about Kevin Spacey. Now, during an interview with BuzzFeed News, Rapp talked about an awful encounter with Spacey. Apparently, during their Broadway days, Spacey invited Rapp to his apartment for a party. From there, he put Rapp on a bed, got on top of him and tried to make a move. Keep in mind, Rapp was only 14 years old at the time. Even worse, Spacey was a full grown 26 years old, son. Needless to say, that’s some prime Law & Order: SVU shit, man.

Now, with his name being dragged through the mud, what does Spacey do? Blame his actions on alcohol and proclaim that he’s living his life as a gay man. Bruh… Bruh! That’s now what we’re talking about here, fam! Shit, being gay ain’t got a DAMN thing to do with pushing up on children, bruh! Hell, I love women, but I know good and well that young girls are off limits, son. As a matter of fact, the last time I hit on a 14-year-old, I was 14, man. Well, maybe 15 at the most. Yeah, that’s how this shit works, people.

Moving on, the media made this situation even worse, fam. Look, instead of speaking about Spacey’s predatorial behavior, they talked about him “coming out.” Son, how badly can people miss the damn point, man?! And now, more people are making claims against the actor. Frankly, I can’t even keep up with all of the fuckery, bruh. With that being said, folks can look up his treachery for themselves, son.

In the end, I can’t even blame Netflix for killing House of Cards, man. Ultimately, they can’t have their star actor making terrible excuses for sexual assault, fam. By and by, the amount of abuse that appears to be going on in Hollywood is staggering, bruh. It seems like all these people do is stand in front of a camera and then try to rape someone. *Sigh* My head hurts, folks. I can’t do this anymore. LC out.

More Terror In New York

So, let me get straight to the point, son. Fuck ISIS and everyone who wants to be down with them, man. Real talk, the entire organization is full of cowards, fam. I mean, what do they really do, bruh? They attack innocent people. That’s all they’re really good for, folks: attacking innocent people. With that being said, I hope they bury Sayfullo Saipov under the jail, son. All in all, his attack on New York City can’t go unanswered, man.

Ok, at this point, everyone should be aware of what’s going on, fam. Basically, 29-year-old Saipov used a rental truck to mow down pedestrians in a Manhattan bike lane. Ultimately, eight people were killed and many more were injured. Finally, when police arrived on the scene, he hopped out of the vehicle, shouted “Allahu Akbar” and got shot by the cops. Apparently, he was carrying a BB gun and a paintball gun.

Now, under normal circumstances, I would eviscerate Donald Trump for IMMEDIATELY politicizing this tragedy. However; I’d much rather have solidarity with the innocent victims, bruh. Frankly, I don’t have time for Trump’s shenanigans, son. By and by, the people are the only ones that actually matter, man. On the real, if 45 really wants to help, then get rid of ISIS like he claimed he would on the campaign trail. Shit, didn’t he say it would be easy, fam? If that was the case, then why do they still exist, people?

In the end, I have nothing else to contribute here, son. All I can say is, Rest In Peace to all of the individuals who lost their lives to such senseless violence. Moving on, it’s high time that we get ISIS the fuck outta here, man! Look, what kind of holy war is solely aimed at innocent people, fam? Keeping it a buck, those are the only ones they’re targeting, bruh. All in all, it’s nothing but sucker shit, folks. So, fuck ‘em all! LC out.

P.S. I just want to put it out there that the authorities were able to capture Saipov alive. Now, I’m not saying, but I’m just saying. That is all.

Robert Mueller Is Putting Cases On All You B*tches!

Disclaimer: Everyone should read the title in Denzel Washington’s voice from Training Day. That is all.

So, shit just got real, huh? After all of the talk about Robert Mueller’s investigation, heads are starting to roll, son. With that being said, I’d be remiss if I didn’t get these jokes off about all of the fuckity-fuck shit going on in Donald Trump’s inner circle. In any case, let’s take a deep dive into all of the shit that Paul Manafort, Rick Gates and George Papadopoulos have gotten themselves into, man.

Ok, for those living under a rock, the shitshow began on Friday, fam. As the week came to a close, word got out that a sealed indictment was underway. From that standpoint, it was highly likely that someone was going to get arrested, bruh. Now, in light of that information, I assumed that Manafort was going to be the first to go down. Shit, after the FBI raised his crib back in August, it was only a matter of time before he was in a world of hurt, folks. Moving on, I was proven right when Monday came around. However; I would’ve never guessed the type of dirt that they have on him, people.

Basically, Trump’s former campaign chairman is a scammer, son. Since around 2005, he’s been laundering millions of dollars through overseas shell companies. Both him and his adviser, Rick Gates, have been living their best Joanne The Scammer life for well over a decade. As it stands, their fraud was still going on even after Manafort came aboard Trump’s team. Anyway, both men have been officially charged and are currently out of bail. In addition, both have pleaded not guilty to the accusations.

Now, the wildest part is, this isn’t even the wildest part of the story, son. Frankly, George Papadopoulos is the bigger news, man. Look, although Manafort and Gates have been involved in massive amounts of fuckery, the White House can still maintain plausible deniability. However; Papadopoulos’ tale is where shit gets interesting, fam. To begin, he’s already pled guilty to lying to federal agents. So, what did he lie about exactly? Russia, bruh. Russia.

As we now know, Papadopoulos, Trump’s former foreign policy adviser, was actively working with Kremlin-connected clowncakes to get dirt on Hillary Clinton. To make matters worse, in his own correspondence, he stated that he wanted someone low-level to meet with them in order to keep the heat away from Trump. Son, that has conspiracy written all over it! Real talk, the situation is so bad for Papadopoulos that he didn’t even try to fight the charges, man. The way I see it, I wouldn’t be surprised if he started rolling on everyone, fam. Shit, let the snitching begin!

In the end, all I can do is laugh at this, bruh. On the real, I doubt we’ve seen the last of the indictments, folks. Hell, I know Michael Flynn is somewhere sweating right now, son. Ultimately, a bunch of corrupt people were/are on Trump’s squad, man. Am I supposed to believe that he’s innocent of ALL of the fuckery? Give me a break, fam. I ain’t that dumb. LC out.