Why Are People Surprised About Juuling?

So, I’d like to apologize ahead of time, son. I mean, I’m legitimately sorry if it looks like I’m being smug, man. But, what the fuck is wrong with people, fam? Like, are people actually surprised about this e-cigarette situation? The way I see it, there’s no such thing as safer smoking, bruh. All in all, I’m not shocked by any of the health risks that are coming out about e-cigarettes.

Ok, let me be real, son. Yes, I understand that Juul isn’t the only e-cigarette company. However, they’re currently in the news because they’ve been making outlandish claims about their product, man. Shit, just because they’re selling vaping devices, Juul is trying to convince people that their brand is safer than conventional cigarettes. The problem is, e-cigarettes still have fucking nicotine and require inhalation. For God‘s sake, these businesses can’t be fucking serious, fam.

As it stands, people are seemingly starting to die from their vaping habits. Right now, the FDA is conducting a full investigation into the exact health risks of e-cigarettes. Hell, while reading about these cases, I keep seeing shit like “mysterious lung disease” and other nonsensical adjectives. The way I see it, there’s nothing mysterious here. People are smoking a product with nicotine in it. Frankly, what the fuck did they think was going to happen? Cigarettes have been dangerous for hundreds of years, bruh. On the real, I don’t care how they package it, son. Death is death is death, man.

In the end, folks need to stop smoking cancer altogether. Ultimately, we all know that this shit isn’t good for us, fam. By and by, we as a society shouldn’t be falling for the trickery and the misdirection, bruh. At the end of the day, smoking isn’t good us. Vaping isn’t good for us. Nicotine isn’t good for us. So, let’s leave all of that deadly shit alone, son. These products aren’t worth our lives, man. That is all. LC out.

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What’s Wrong With Serena Williams?

So, let me begin this post by saying that Serena Williams is the greatest tennis player of all time. No, not just the greatest women’s player, but the greatest player, period. In any case, something is off about her, son. I mean, it’s almost as if she can’t win the big match anymore. All in all, what’s wrong with Serena Williams?

Ok, for those who missed it, Williams just played in the 2019 US Open final. She ended up losing in straight sets to 19-year-old Bianca Andreescu. Now, if this was an isolated incident, then I wouldn’t be that pressed about it. However, this is the fourth straight major final that Williams has lost. Shit, she lost the 2018 Wimbledon final to Angelique Kerber, she lost the 2018 US Open final to Naomi Osaka, she lost the 2019 Wimbledon final to Simona Halep and now this one. Listen, before this streak, she had a 23-6 record in major finals, dating back to 1999. Fam, she’s almost doubled that loss total in less than two years.

On the real, I wonder if the pressure is starting to get to her, man. Hell, with another win, she’d tie Margaret Court with the most major wins ever. Like, ever, bruh. Listen, Williams is already the greatest, but this would put her in the record books forever, son. Frankly, I really want to know if there’s a mental block that’s keeping her from reaching this feat. I mean, everyone she’s lost to is a great player, but she’s fucking Serena Williams, fam. If she’s good enough to keep reaching these finals, she’s good enough to win it all, brethren.

My fear is, the run is going to eventually come to an end, son. Like, there’s no guarantee that she’s going to keep making it to the finals of these tournaments, man. All I know is, if she doesn’t get that 24th title, she’s going to be sick looking back on all of the missed opportunities, fam. Now, keeping it a buck, it’s miracle that she’s been so productive post-pregnancy and post-illness. However, she’s Superwoman to me, bruh. The fact is, I don’t want to see her end her career without reaching that milestone, folks.

In the end, I hope Williams can figure this shit out, son. Ultimately, an athlete of her stature deserves to stand alone at the top. By and by, I just want her to get it done before the well dries up, man. At the end of the day, not even the greatest can do it forever, fam. Let’s get it done, Serena! That is all. LC out.

My Conflicted Thoughts On DeMarcus Cousins

So, DeMarcus Cousins has had a tough couple of years, huh? I mean, where do I even begin, son? In 2018, while playing for the New Orleans Pelicans, Cousins tore his left Achilles tendon. Then, in April of this year, while playing for the Golden State Warriors, he tore his left quadriceps. Fast forward to August, his tore his ACL as a new member of the Los Angeles Lakers. All in all, his stock as an NBA player has taken a MAJOR hit due to his injuries. Now, on top of all of that, he’s wanted by police in Mobile, Alabama.

Ok, for those who missed it, an arrest warrant for Cousins has been issued in relation to a misdemeanor domestic violence charge. Now, as outlined in the leaked audio from TMZ, Cousins threatened to shoot Cristy West, his son Amir‘s mother, in the head. Honestly, I highly doubt that was a real threat, but that’s not the point, man. The fact is, no man is allowed to talk to anyone like that, especially not the mother of his child. In addition, West has alleged that Cousins has choked her in the past. All I know is, if her stories of abuse are real, then Cousins is a piece of shit, fam.

With all of that being said, here’s my beef with West, bruh. Now, after listening to the recording, the source of the tension was Amir’s presence, or lack thereof, at Cousins’ wedding. Apparently, before his marriage to Morgan Lang, Cousins asked West to let Amir attend the ceremony. She refused. He asked a few more times and she still refused. From there, Cousins lost his cotdamn mind and threatened to shoot her. All I can say is, it’s a terrible situation all around.

Now, am I excusing Cousins’ reaction? Fuck no, son. Frankly, he was deadass wrong for coming at her like that. But, why would she refuse his request, man? Like, if he truly wanted his son at his wedding, why was that a problem? In my eyes, it’s petty to keep Amir away on a day that meant a lot to Cousins. To me, that part of the story gets lost in the general narrative, fam.

Listen, dudes are often painted as deadbeats when it comes to parenting and the court system. A lot of times, it’s an accurate assertion, bruh. However, not enough emphasis is placed on women who don’t let men see their children. The truth is, that happens waaaay more than people like to admit. I know multiple stories of children who are used as pawns in a battle between parents. Real talk, everyone needs to grow the fuck up and realize that the kids come first, brethren.

Look, when I was in the doghouse years ago, my wife could’ve easily kept my son away from me. However, she didn’t, man. Shit, she would ignore me for everything else, but gladly call to say “come get your son.” Granted, it didn’t feel good being up shit’s creek, but my child was never taken from me, fam. Side note, during one of those past exchanges, she literally opened her apartment door wide enough to push the stroller out and then shut it right back. She haaaaated me, people. It’s hilarious now but was super awkward back then. Anyway, people need to put their pride aside and let parents parent. Well, unless that parent is an actual danger to the child’s well-being.

In the end, I see both sides to this story, bruh. Ultimately, Cousins fucked up by saying that foul shit to West. However, I also think West fucked up by denying their son access to Cousins’ wedding. By and by, this is a messy ass situation, son. At the end of the day, speaking as a dude from a broken house, keep the courts out of parenting, man. Hell, the ending rarely works out for anyone, fam. That is all. LC out.

I’m Down With These New Pusha T Songs

So, per usual, I’m going to try and keep this post short today, son. Basically, I’m just here to vibe out to these new Pusha T songs, man. I mean, it’s already been established that Pusha is one of my favorite rappers, fam. On top of that, I was one of the first people to champion Daytona when it dropped last year. With that being said, despite Kanye West‘s fuckery, I’m glad that he’s still behind the boards for Pusha’s upcoming album. All in all, I expect nothing but good things, bruh.

Ok, for those who missed it, Pusha just dropped two new songs. Now, the first one is joint called “Sociopath.” The song, which features Kash Doll, was apparently left off of Daytona, for whatever reason. Regardless, the joint is grimy as fuck and the type of record that I want to hear from Pusha. Side bar, I fucking love Kash Doll, son. I could go into more detail, but I will refrain, man. In any case, who doesn’t love that arrogant street shit that only Pusha can provide, fam? On the real, that aesthetic is what made me a Pusha and Clipse fan in the first place, bruh.

Moving on, the second song, “Coming Home,” is the one that surprised me, son. Listen, not only did Pusha make a meaningful song about mass incarceration, but he managed to get Lauryn Hill in the booth. Now, I won’t lie, man. Based on her years of tomfoolery, I’ve had my issues with Hill. But, I’m not going to sit here and pretend like she doesn’t sound good on that song, fam. Real talk, it’s dope to hear her sound like herself on a track. Look, does it have the same sheen as her prime? No. However, her contribution is a welcomed addition, bruh.

In the end, there’s nothing else to say, son. Ultimately, people can judge the music for themselves, man. By and by, both tracks have been posted below. Shit, let the good times roll, fam. That is all. LC out.

P.S. Did anyone see Drake talking shit in Joe Budden‘s Instagram live? Son, Joe was out here enjoying his pool party and Drake asked him to play “The Story of Adidon” and see how the crowd reacted. Needless to say, Pusha is still living in Drake’s head rent free. Keeping it a buck, Drake just needs to let that hurt go, bruh. Frankly, he lost the battle, son. Facts are facts, man. Good day.

Dave Chappelle Doesn’t Give A F*ckity-F*ck

So, here we are, son. It’s 2019 and Dave Chappelle, the G.O.A.T., is back with another comedy special. Now, before I even watched Dave Chappelle: Sticks & Stones, I saw a couple of think pieces about why people shouldn’t view the Netflix special. All in all, I think it’s a terrible time to be a comedian, man. I mean, everyone is so damn sensitive and can’t see the humor in anything anymore.

Ok, to be clear, is Chappelle being offensive in this special? Absolutely, fam. But, he’s literally based his entire career on saying provocative shit, bruh. Hell, has anybody ever seen Chappelle’s Show? Son, the first fucking episode featured Clayton Bigsby, a Black White supremacist. Meaning, Chappelle has spent this whole time pushing the envelope, man. So, why is every joke seemingly off limits now?

My thing is, folks don’t have to find his jokes funny. Frankly, comedy is subjective as fuck, fam. Personally, I thought the special was hilarious, bruh. Now, does that mean I hate transgender people? No. Does that mean I hate the #MeToo movement? No. It just means that I can find humor in fucked up situations. For God‘s sake, that’s what comedy has done since the beginning of time, son. The truth is, no one batted an eye when Chappelle made racially-charged jokes for years. But, if he speaks on anything else, now he needs to be “cancelled?” The way I see it, folks can get the fuck outta here, man.

Listen, Chappelle basically said as much when he talked about getting called out for saying “faggot” on Chappelle’s Show. Look, he legitimately asked why he could say “nigger,” but couldn’t say “faggot.” To me, that’s a good fucking question, fam. So, only a certain type of offensive language is acceptable? If we’re keeping it a buck, ALL of the jokes were in “bad taste.” But, that’s what made them funny. All I know is, everybody needs to lighten up, bruh.

Now, I’m sure that some people are going to hate on me for writing this post. However, I laughed when he talked about Michael Jackson. I laughed when he talked about R. Kelly. I laughed at the jokes about Kevin HartJussie Smollett, school shootings AND the opioid crisis. Individually, are any of these subjects comical? Fuck no, son. But, finding humor in despair has always been part of the genre. All I can say is, society has lost the ability to laugh along the way. Hell, everything has become so serious and it’s a fucking buzzkill, man.

In the end, let me say it again, fam: I’m not telling anyone to like Chappelle’s special. Ultimately, I just think people need to relax. By and by, we laughed with Richard Pryor when he made a joke about setting himself on fire. The real is, he was high out of his mind and tried to kill himself. In addition, all of Eddie Murphy‘s specials are inappropriate as fuck. But, we just went along for the ride, bruh. At the end of the day, I don’t think Chappelle is being hateful at all. I just believe he finds humor in sensitive topics, son. On the real, we all used to have that ability. That is all. LC out.

I Have Mixed Feelings About This ‘Breaking Bad’ Movie

So, let me begin by saying that Breaking Bad is the greatest show in the history of mankind. Listen, I don’t care what anyone says and I don’t want to hear any alternatives. On the real, there is literally NOTHING a person can say to change my mind about this, son. With that being said, I’m simultaneously excited and frightened about the announcement of a Breaking Bad-inspired movie. Frankly, I don’t want Vince Gilligan to ruin a classic, man.

Ok, for those who missed it, Gilligan, the creator, head writer and main director for AMC‘s Breaking Bad, is bringing his talents to Netflix. So, on October 11th, the Aaron Paul-led El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie will hit the streaming service. Now, based on what I’ve read, the plot begins in the aftermath of “Felina,” Breaking Bad‘s final episode. As a refresher, Walter White liberated Jesse Pinkman from his White supremacist captors, and then Pinkman escaped in a Chevrolet El Camino (hint hint). In addition, White ended up dying, not from his cancer, but by bullets from his own M60 machine gun.

Moving on, while I don’t know much about this movie’s plot, it apparently follows Pinkman’s journey after securing his freedom. Now, a part of me can’t contain my happiness, fam. I mean, the prospect of more Breaking Bad in my life is almost more than I can handle, bruh. But, what is the show without Walter White? What is the show without the complicated relationship between Heisenberg and Pinkman? Shit, can Pinkman carry the entire film himself? Does Vince Gilligan still have a compelling story to tell? All in all, I have as much fear as elation, son. The truth is, I don’t want the saga to jump the shark, man.

In the end, only time will tell, fam. Ultimately, I’ll have all of my questions answered on October 11th, bruh. By and by, I have my fingers crossed and I’m hoping for the best, son. At the end of the day, I trust Gilligan, man. Real talk, I don’t think he’ll lead us astray, brethren. That is all. LC out.

Folks Are Wilin’ For Chicken Sandwiches

So, this is what it’s come to, son. Pandemonium has ensued and cities are in chaos, man. Now, what could be the cause of the mayhem, fam? Is it martial law? Is it Godzilla? Is it a supernatural fight between those teenagers from Chronicle? Nah, it’s just a bunch of muhfuckas losing their minds over Popeyes‘ new chicken sandwich. All I know is, even if the sandwich is delicious, folks are out here wilin’ over poultry, bruh.

Ok, before I continue, let me keep in a buck, son. Now, I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I’m too good for a chicken sandwich. I mean, I definitely want to see what all of the hype is about, man. However, I’m not about to lower my pride and put my body at risk for breaded chicken, fam. Like, I keep reading story after story after story of insanely long lines, people getting into fights and a general lack of inventory. Shit, these sandwiches are so scarce that Quavo from Migos is selling them shits for $1,000 each. All I can say is, we have officially jumped the fucking shark, bruh.

Look, I don’t have much to say here, son. The point is, everyone needs to fucking relax, man. Frankly, unless Popeyes decides to stop making these sandwiches, we’ll all get one eventually, fam. The way I see it, anyone getting into a fistfight over chicken needs to reevaluate their life, bruh. Listen, I have no idea if the sandwich is better than Chick-fil-A‘s, brethren. But, I’m sure we’ll all be able to find out for ourselves. In the meantime, people need to fucking chill. Side note, I never thought Chick-fil-A was that amazing, but that’s another story for another day.

In the end, that’s all I’ve got, son. Ultimately, chicken sandwiches shouldn’t be a source of neighborhood strife, man. By and by, I’m sure I’m contributing to the tomfoolery by writing this post, fam. The word is, we’ve already given Popeyes about $24 million worth of free advertising. Once again, we as consumers don’t understand the power we have. So, at the end of the day, Popeyes is winning regardless, bruh. Good for them, I guess. That is all. LC out.