Stop Deflecting Away From Jussie Smollett’s Nonsense

So, I’m going to try and keep this short today, son. Basically, I’m tired of the bullshit, man. On the real, anytime a Black person is caught doing some foul shit, people bring up White folks who’ve gotten away with similar foul shit. All I know is, it brings me back to a question I’ve asked before: do Black people want to be right or do we want to get away with the same crimes as White people? The point is, Jussie Smollett was deadass wrong, fam. Frankly, any attempt to defend him is severely misguided.

Ok, for those who are living under a rock, Smollett has officially been arrested and charged with filing a false police report. Now, according to the law, this offense is a Class 4 Felony, which could result in 1-3 years in prison and a $25,000 fine. Anyway, I think it’s safe to say that Smollett is in a world of shit right now, bruh. Moving on, I don’t like the narrative that’s spreading through social media, son. Listen, regardless of other offenders, Smollett still did something incredibly wrong, man. The fact is, he needs to pay for his nonsense, fam.

Listen, I’m seeing a lot of people bring up White folks who’ve falsely called the cops on Black people. Ok, yes, that’s another issue that desperately needs to be addressed, bruh. The way I see it, all of the Petty Patty’s and Nosy Nancy’s need to be prosecuted for involving in the law in unnecessary situations. However, that doesn’t take away from the fact that Smollett needs to be held accountable for his actions. I mean, HE FAKED A COTDAMN HATE CRIME, SON! Like, how else could I possibly phrase that? The truth is, he doesn’t deserve our damn sympathy, man. All in all, more Black people should be mad at him, fam. Shit, folks were ready to ride for him and he made us all look like idiots, brethren.

In the end, I really want people to stop changing the story, son. Ultimately, two things can be true at once, man. By and by, Smollett should be charged for his tomfoolery AND White people should be charged for fraudulently calling the police. At the end of the day, Smollett shouldn’t be exempt from justice, fam. In addition, he needs to be ridiculed for such a botched plan, bruh. Hell, this entire saga unraveled faster than a Payless shoe, people. *Sigh* I don’t know what else to say here. LC out.

P.S. Miss me with any of that “mental health” shit, son. Keeping it a buck, I can already see that narrative gaining traction, man. All I can say is, I rebuke all of that, fam. In my eyes, Smollett is nothing more than a fucking clown, bruh. That is all.

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What The F*ck, Jussie?!

So, I won’t lie, son. On the real, I’m mad at myself, man. I’m mad that I fell for the gaffle, fam. I’m mad that it didn’t even cross my mind that an idiot could fabricate a story like this. All in all, fuck Jussie Smollett, bruh. Keeping it a buck, if he really did stage a hate crime, which it seems like he did, we need to throw his ass into the fucking abyss, people. The way I see it, an action like this is unforgivable, folks. Real talk, this type of tomfoolery could have lasting and damaging implications.

Ok, for those who haven’t been paying attention, Chicago police have poked a ton of holes in Smollett’s story, son. Now, I started to believe something was up when homie was onstage saying he was the “gay Tupac.” Fam, what part of the game is that? I mean, is this how far someone would go for “clout,” man? For God’s sake, the two alleged attackers ended up being Nigerian brothers who knew Smollett. Shit, one of them appeared as an extra on Empire and another one is apparently Smollett’s trainer. Frankly, I don’t know who is who, bruh.

To make matters worse, the brothers have seemingly admitted that Smollett paid them to “attack” him. According to new reports, when the cops raided the brothers’ crib, they found ropes, masks and bleach. Like, I don’t even know what to say here, son. In all honesty, Smollett’s alleged actions are EXTREMELY dangerous, man. Hell, we legitimately live in a country where Black and gay people are harmed for being Black, gay or both. So, why the FUCK would Smollett play games with a narrative like this? All I know is, he’s made it INCREDIBLY difficult for real victims to get justice, fam. Listen, because of his seemingly false “this is MAGA country” claims, Fox News and the right-wing are already running with this, bruh. Smollett has given them all the ammo they need to dismiss REAL hatred and bigotry.

In the end, I’ll say it again, son. Fuck Jussie Smollett, man! Ultimately, I have to use the word “allegedly” for this entire post. However, shit ain’t looking good for him, fam. By and by, if it’s truly confirmed that he staged this whole incident, I hope he never works again, bruh. At the end of the day, fuck his music, fuck his acting and fuck any other endeavor of his, brethren. As a matter of fact, he needs to go to jail for some nonsense like this, folks. All I can say is, it takes a foul individual to be this disgusting, people. *Sigh* LC out.

What The F*ck Did They Do To Jussie Smollett?!

So, I won’t lie, son. Real talk, I’m blown away right now, man. Like, what year are we in, fam? Seriously, what fucking year is it, bruh? Keeping it a buck, I don’t want to hear anything about progress, people. Shit, every time we think we’re moving ahead as a country, some fuckery occurs to bring us all back down. All I know is, the attack on Jussie Smollett was absolutely unconscionable. Frankly, I’m having a hard time putting my frustration into words, folks.

Ok, for those who missed it, Smollett was attacked in Chicago on Tuesday morning. According to the story, while walking out of a Subway restaurant at 2 AM, two dudes rolled up on him and said “aren’t you that faggot Empire nigger?” From there, the two ski-masked men hit Smollett in the face, injured his rib, put a rope around his neck and poured an “unknown chemical substance” on him. After all of that, the men allegedly yelled “this is MAGA country” before leaving the scene.

Now, I don’t even know where to start, son. I mean, do I start at the “faggot” part? Do I start at the “nigger” part? Or, should I start at the “MAGA country” part? Regardless, this whole scenario appears to be a clusterfuck of hate, man. Not to mention, a letter threatening Smollett was sent to Fox studios just a week prior to this incident. Meaning, he may have been targeted this entire time, fam.

Listen, I need Donald Trump supporters to hear me clear. As much as the MAGA brigade likes to say they’re not racist or xenophobic, there are a number of people who commit atrocities in their name. Look, if folks want all Muslims to atone for the actions of the radical few, why does MAGA nation think they’re exempt? It’s not a coincidence that losers preach hate in their name. It’s not a coincidence that David Duke identifies with the message. All in all, I don’t want to hear any of that “I don’t agree with everything Trump says” shit. The way I see it, it’s a package deal, bruh. People can’t piecemeal what they want and ignore all of the other tomfoolery that comes with it, son.

In the end, I’m wishing the best for Jussie Smollett. Ultimately, I hope they catch the motherfuckers who did this bullshit to him, man. By and by, it’s frightening that crimes like this are still occurring in 2019. At the end of the day, it’s dangerous for so many different groups of people, fam. *Sigh* This is America. Don’t catch you slipping up. LC out.

Fraud, As Told By Ja Rule

Oh my god, this is terrible. Could somebody please find Ja Rule, get ahold of this motherfucker, so I can make sense of all this? Where is Ja?

So, as usual, Dave Chappelle said it all, son. All I know is, I laughed way harder than I should’ve while watching that Fyre documentary on Netflix. Real talk, the Fyre Festival was one of the biggest scams I’ve ever seen, man. Now, before watching this doc, I already knew that a ton of fuckery went down. However, I was thoroughly baffled to see how much nonsense Ja and Billy McFarland tried to get away with. Furthermore, I was confused about how people fell for this shit. All in all, this entire saga was a glorious train wreck, fam.

Ok, for those who missed it, the failed Fyre Festival is back in the news. As of right now, there are two documentaries making their rounds on streaming services. First, there’s the aforementioned Fyre doc on Netflix. In addition, there’s the Fyre Fraud doc on Hulu. Keeping it a buck, I can only speak on the Netflix joint since I don’t have Hulu. Anyway, while watching the footage with my wife, I was blown away by this whole operation, bruh. I mean, this idea was doomed from the start, son. Frankly, I have no idea why anyone went along with this bullshit, man.

Now, where do I even begin, fam? Look, there was NO way McFarland and company could pull any of their promises off, bruh. Shit, McFarland lied to people about EVERYTHING. Like, he had no island, no luxury lodging, no headlining acts and no one to tell him to chill. But, he always found a way to get folks to invest more of their money, son. Hell, all it took was a co-sign from Ja, Kendall Jenner, Bella Hadid, Emily Ratajkowski and Chanel Iman. From there, people were ready to commit, man. All I know is, there was never a time where this festival would even remotely work, brethren.

Keeping it a buck, I have a hard time feeling sorry for people, son. Ok, yes, I feel terrible for the Bahamian folks who were taken advantage of. Side note, shout-out to the GoFundMe campaign that raised close to $200,000 for MaryAnn Rolle. After taking a HUGE loss for trying to feed people during the festival, it appears that she’s been made whole again. In any case, that’s where my sympathy stops, man. Seriously, anyone who fell for the “villa tent” mirage is an idiot, fam. Like, I saw someone write “will my tent have an outlet” in an email to McFarland. No, dumbass! Folks should’ve been happy with ham sandwiches and FEMA tents. That’s all McFarland had for them, bruh.

In the end, Ja Rule needs to be honest, son. Ultimately, false advertising is the same as fraud, man. By and by, Billy McFarland and Ja finessed folks with Joanne The Scammer-like precision, fam. At the end of the day, I have no clue how Ja skated, bruh. I mean, he got hit with a class action lawsuit, but he’s not facing prison time like McFarland. *Sigh* At least I can still hold onto Ja’s first three albums, folks. He’s been up to nonstop tomfoolery ever since. That is all. LC out.

The Uncomfortable Truth About Older Guys & Young Girls

So, let’s be real, son. By now, I’m pretty sure a large number of us have watched Lifetime’s Surviving R. Kelly documentary. I mean, what else needs to be said, man? Robert Sylvester Kelly is a fucking creep, fam! Also, water is wet, bruh. But, Kelly isn’t the subject of today’s post, people. Well, not exactly. Instead, he’s the inspiration for a broader conversation that needs to be had, folks. Namely, all of the other old ass dudes who continue to do what Kelly has done. The fact is, he isn’t the only older guy who has shown a propensity for younger girls.

Ok, before I continue, let me tell everyone a quick story. So, back in the sixth grade, I was uber corny, son. Like, I had glasses, braces and wack ass clothes, man. Shit, with all of my powers combined, I was traaaaash, fam. Anyway, there was a girl in my class who I was enamored with. Now, despite my place on the social totem pole, I shot my shot at her, bruh. Needless to say, I got turned down. However, she wasn’t rough about it. In actuality, she told me that she had a boyfriend and couldn’t mess with me in that way.

Moving on, one day after school, her boyfriend was waiting for her. In fact, he was waiting in his Acura Legend and he was a junior at our neighboring high school. All I know is, he was 17 years old when she was 11. Now, at the time, I didn’t really comprehend what was going on, son. Partly because I was young and partly because this wasn’t an isolated case. In fact, I knew a number of classmates who were in similar situations, man. Hell, it was “normal” for a hot chick to be “dating” an older dude. Little did we know it was weird as fuck, fam. As time went on, I noticed the same behavior, bruh. By the time I was 17, a girl I messed with the year before got pregnant by a 24-year-old drug dealer. Needless to say, we ALL knew it was problematic as shit, brethren.

The point is, there are a ton of R. Kelly’s running around out here, son. Frankly, we have to call ALL of them out, man. Look, I don’t care who they are, where they’re from or what they do. Older dudes have NO business dealing with these young girls, fam. For whatever reason, we sweep a lot of that shit under the rug. But, enough is enough, bruh. All in all, we need to hold EVERYBODY accountable, folks.

In the end, I’m raising a middle finger to all of those nasty ass sumbitches out there. At the end of the day, they need to go find some women their own damn age, son. Ultimately, we need to let children and teenagers be children and teenagers, man. By and by, they’re not here for some older loser’s deviance, fam. That is all. LC out.

How Much Evidence Do R. Kelly Supporters Need?

So, I’m just going to get straight to the point, son. On the real, Lifetime’s Surviving R. Kelly is already one of the wildest documentaries I’ve ever seen, man. The problem is, we’re not even halfway through all of his fuckery, fam. Now, to be honest, I knew a lot of these details already. However, that didn’t stop me from being blown away while listening to some of his victims tell their stories. Furthermore, the details that I didn’t know were beyond my level of comprehension, bruh. All in all, allow me to talk through some of the shit that threw me for a complete loop, folks.

First, let’s talk about Aaliyah, son. Ok, at this point, everyone knows that Kelly married her back in 1994. Now, as the story goes, they lied about Aaliyah’s age on the marriage certificate and the two singers tied the knot in Cook County, Illinois. Anyway, my issue is the number of close associates who knew about the shenanigans and did nothing about it. Shit, Demetrius Smith, Kelly’s former tour manager, was the dude who faked the papers for Kelly. Fam! What in the flying FUCK was wrong with that dude, man?! For God’s sake, she was a CHILD, bruh! Real talk, how can that man even live with himself, people?

Second, I can no longer listen to Michael Jackson’s “You Are Not Alone.” Look, let’s be real, son. Given the number of allegations that plagued MJ, I didn’t need another reason to be sick to my stomach, man. But, leave it to Kelly to ruin the day, fam. Now, according to Lizzette Martinez, a woman who met Kelly when she was 17, MJ’s hit song is about her. Apparently, Kelly got her pregnant when she was still in high school and she suffered a miscarriage. After that, Kelly wrote the song and claimed he was thinking about her. Ok, excuse me while I go throw up, bruh.

Third, Kelly’s older brother is a fucking creep, son. I mean, it’s one thing to defend a sibling. However, it’s an entirely different thing to excuse criminal behavior, man. Hell, that’s exactly what Bruce Kelly tried to do, fam. Like, he didn’t understand why people were tripping over R. Kelly’s love of young girls. Bruh! IT’S ILLEGAL, DUDE! Listen, this has NOTHING to do with preference, folks. Underage girls aren’t a cotdamn preference, people! *Sigh* He can’t be fucking serious, brethren. All I can say is, the ENTIRE Kelly family is full of warped human beings.

In the end, I haven’t even gone below the surface of R. Kelly’s tomfoolery, son. Ultimately, people have to watch dream hampton’s documentary for themselves. By and by, Kelly is one of the most dangerous predators we’ve ever seen, man. At the end of the day, he’s been up to the same level of deviance for like three decades. Hell, it’s no coincidence that all of these women have such similar stories, fam. Frankly, this is who R. Kelly is through and through. All I know is, if anyone still rocks with R. Kelly, then they’re rapist sympathizers. Keeping it a buck, there’s no other way to describe this, bruh. That is all. LC out.

P.S. This dude apparently likes it when girls call him “Daddy.” Now, as a reminder, he also made a song called “Come To Daddy.” Jesus Christ, son! Like, I can’t even put into words how disturbing this guy is, man. No mas.

I Almost Disowned My Mother Over Stan Lee

So, allow me to keep it a buck for a second, son. Real talk, if anyone doesn’t understand how legendary Stan Lee was/is, then I really don’t want to know that person. Taking it a step further, if I have a friend/family member who doesn’t comprehend Lee’s GOAT‘ness, then I’m not sure that I can continue our relationship. I mean, Lee was The Gawd, man! Seriously, where the fuck would Marvel Comics or the overall zeitgeist be if Lee never existed, fam? Shit, I don’t even want to imagine such a world. All in all, Rest In Peace to one of the greatest dudes ever!

Ok, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, let me explain the title of this post, bruh. So, once upon a time in elementary school, I was a HUGE comic book fan. Side note, I dare someone to test my knowledge on anything before like 2005. Honestly, I’ve got this, son. In any case, around like the third grade, I came across a special comic book: an original edition of Amazing Spider-Man #300. Now, for anyone who is unaware, this issue contains the first full-length appearance of Venom. Moving on, the comic first came out in 1988, but somehow in the early 1990s, I found an original copy. Needless to say, I was fucking HYPED, man!

Anyway, even though Lee didn’t write that particular issue, it’s no secret that Peter Parker was his brainchild. Hell, Parker along with every other Marvel character who has ever mattered, fam. All I can say is, getting ahold of Venom’s first foray meant EVERYTHING to me, bruh! On the real, I read that comic once and put it back in the plastic, son. Listen, I didn’t want to risk creasing it, man.

Now, fast forward to my freshman year of boarding school. I came home for my first vacation and noticed my room looked a little different. Most notably, my bookcase seemed to be missing all of my comic books. To add insult to injury, I definitely noticed that Spider-Man #300 was missing. From there, I asked my mom where my comics were and she uttered four words that changed our relationship: “I threw them out.” I immediately asked her why she would do such a thing and she said “you’re a teenager now, I figured you wouldn’t want them anymore.” All I know is, that might’ve been the only time I legitimately wanted to hit my own mother with the Stone Cold Stunner.

Look, I told that story to highlight one main point: Stan Lee invented a universe that I NEEDED to be a part of. Like, he created characters with nuance, fam. He created characters with ethos. For God‘s sake, he based Professor X and Magneto on Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X! What else do people need to know, bruh?! Yeah, these heroes had unreal abilities, but a lot of them had VERY real problems, son. Keeping it a buck, what awkward teenager couldn’t relate to Peter Parker? Being a superhero didn’t absolve him from the trash-ness of high school, man. The fact is, Lee built a world that all of us could identify with AND get lost in.

In the end, RIP to the greatest! Ultimately, his influence will forever be solidified. By and by, Marvel is stronger than ever and it’s directly because of his influence. At the end of the day, legends never die, fam. Long live Stan Lee! That is all. LC out.

P.S. Man, I still don’t know if I’ve forgiven my mom. Look, I just Google‘d the price of an original copy of that Spider-Man issue and got mad all over again. *Sigh* Her and I need to have another discussion, son. Good day.