Kawhi Leonard Got Deported

So, it finally happened, huh? Kawhi Leonard finally got his wish to be done with the San Antonio Spurs. After all of last season’s tomfoolery, he’s now free of the clutches of Gregg Popovich and company. Now, in a year’s time, we’ll see if Leonard sticks with the Toronto Raptors. All I know is, DeMar DeRozan got royally fucked by a team he was loyal to.

Ok, for those who missed it, the Spurs traded Leonard and Danny Green to the Raptors for DeRozan, Jakob Poeltl and a protected first-round pick. Now, it’s no secret that Leonard wanted out of San Antonio. Hell, he already made it abundantly clear that he wasn’t going to cooperate with the Spurs. I mean, he stopped returning phone calls, he dodged meetings AND he failed to show up to any playoff games. On the real, what else could he have possibly done, son? Anybody could see that he was ducking any and everything, man.

Keeping it a buck, I feel like Leonard has acted like a bitch this entire process, fam. Look, wanting to leave is one thing, but by all accounts, he was wildly unprofessional, bruh. Since when is it cool to not report for work AND not keep in contact with management? Real talk, if any regular person tried that, we’d be on that unemployment line fast and in a hurry, son. Listen, we’re all adults here, man. If Leonard was really that unhappy with the organization, then be a grownup and tell them, brethren. Shit, he really had EVERYONE guessing what was going on in his head.

To make matters worse, there were all of these rumors that he only wanted to go to the Los Angeles Lakers. Then, after LeBron James joined the team, reports came out that he didn’t want to be “second fiddle” to James. Man, can this dude knock it the fuck off, son? So, he doesn’t want to play for the Spurs, he doesn’t want to play for the Raptors AND he doesn’t want to play with LeBron? Well, what the fuck does this dude want, fam? All I can say is, as talented as Leonard is, I don’t think he’s good enough for all of the bullshit around him, bruh.

In the end, shout-out to DeRozan, son. Ultimately, it’s a damn shame that he got caught up in Leonard’s nonsense, man. By and by, I hope he’s able to do some damage with LaMarcus Aldridge next season. In addition, I hope the Raptors are ready for the fuckery of Leonard. At the end of the day, he could easily dip after next season and Toronto could end up with nothing. Furthermore, we’ve already seen that Leonard will sit out a season, fam. Look, they better hope that giving up DeRozan, a lifelong Raptor, was worth it, bruh. That is all. LC out.

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Who Calls The Cops Over A Foul?!

Nah, seriously, White people need to stop calling the fucking cops on Black folks, son. I mean, this tomfoolery is completely out of control, man! Like, law enforcement has WAY more important shit to deal with, fam. I swear, the authorities are becoming involved in dumber and dumber situations, bruh. All I know is, this basketball incident takes the fucking cake, brethren. Hell, never in a million years did I think I’d see the cops called over a foul, people. Yes, a fucking foul, folks! On the real, I’ve officially seen it all.

Ok, for those who missed it, the most ridiculous thing occurred yesterday. Now, at an LA Fitness in Sterling, Virginia, a group of dudes were playing basketball. So, one particular game got physical. In any case, a Black dude set a pick on this White guy and the White guy fell to the floor. When he got up, he proclaimed that he was going to call the police. Moving on, no one took him seriously and continued their game. That was until the cops actually showed up, son. Apparently, the authorities were told that there was a fight going on in the gym.

Look, I’ve seen and heard a lot of things in my life, man. However, this is hands down one of the most preposterous events I’ve ever come across, fam! My Lord, why the fuck do White folks call the police for EVERYTHING?! Bruh, what part of the game involves police? Seriously, on what planet does Officer So-and-So have to get in the middle of a pickup game? Real talk, some of these White people must REALLY want us all to get shot, son. Keeping it a buck, I can’t even think of any other reason why they ALWAYS feel the need to call The Boys in Blue on us.

In the end, White people need to chill with the fuckery, man. Ok, yes, I know it’s not all White folks, fam. Side note, it’s a damn shame that I have to make that distinction, bruh. In any case, these “bad apples” are always looking to criminalize us. Ultimately, setting a hard pick doesn’t make a Black man a criminal, people. By and by, the nonsense needs to stop, brethren. Like, it really needs to fucking stop. Knock it off, White people! LC out.

Get Papa John’s The F*ck Outta Here!

So, I can’t even say that I’m surprised, son. I mean, Papa John’s has been trash forever, man. Shit, pick a category, fam: the company’s founder, John Schnatter, is a known bigot and their product is garbage. On the real, I haven’t eaten any of their basura since I slapped one of their delivery men during my junior year of college. Side note, don’t ever shove a box of pizza into my stomach, bruh. Bad things will happen. In any case, after Schnatter’s latest faux pas, it’s time to get the entire establishment the fuck outta here, folks!

Ok, for those who missed it, Schnatter got caught saying some fuckity-fuck shit on a conference call. So, the tomfoolery occurred when he tried to clear up some other nonsense he said. Now, if folks don’t remember, during the previous NFL season, Schnatter claimed that Papa John’s was losing revenue due to players kneeling during the National Anthem. Apparently, since Black players wanted to bring attention to our livelihood, folks didn’t buy more boxes of his subpar pizza.

Anyway, when asked how he’d separate himself from racist groups, Schnatter scoffed and said “Colonel Sanders called Blacks niggers.” Wait, what? What?! THAT’S his response, son?! So, because he didn’t use blatant racial slurs like KFC‘s founder, we should all just let him cook?! Maaaaan, if somebody doesn’t get this bozo the fuck outta my face! Like, on what planet is that an acceptable reply, fam? This dude really tried to use the “my racism isn’t as bad as his racism” defense, bruh. *Sigh* This can’t be life, brethren!

In the end, fuck Papa John’s as a staff, restaurant and as a motherfucking crew! And if you want to be down with Papa John’s, then fuck you too! Sorry, my bad, Tupac‘s “Hit ‘Em Up” will always be in my blood, son. Moving on, I’m happy that he’s stepping down from his position, man. Ok, yes, I know he still owns the largest percentage of the company. But, at least I don’t have to see his face or hear anymore of his bullshit, fam. Ultimately, I’ll take that as a small victory, bruh. That is all. LC out.

We Know Nothing About This LeSean McCoy Situation

Ok, I won’t lie, son. I can already see the angry responses to this post, man. With that being said, let me make myself clear from the jump, fam. Look, I’m not defending nor condemning LeSean McCoy in this article, bruh. Frankly, I know absolutely nothing about his potential involvement in Delicia Cordon‘s assault, folks. My thing is, no one else on social media knows anything either, people. So, can we stop presenting opinions as facts, brethren?

Now, for those who missed it, McCoy, a running back for the Buffalo Bills, may be in a world of shit, son. Just yesterday, a woman named Mia, who goes by @miamor_i_adore on Instagram, posted a pic of Cordon with her face bloodied. According to Mia, McCoy is responsible for Cordon’s injuries and she’s even alleged that he’s previously beaten his son and his dog too. Apparently, McCoy has a history of putting his hands on any and everything, man.

In any case, a few hours after Mia’s revelation, reports started to surface that Cordon was actually assaulted during a home invasion. It seems as if an assailant came into a house that Cordon shared with McCoy, pistol-whipped the woman and demanded specific items, including jewelry and a cellphone. Now, this is notable because McCoy has allegedly been trying to get Cordon out of his house for some months now. So, it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility that McCoy set this situation up. Mainly because it doesn’t appear that there was forced entry into the house.

Moving on, here’s my issue with this story, fam: there is WAY too much speculating going on, bruh. First, Mia and Cordon’s mother claimed that McCoy did this himself. Next, it was stated that he setup the home invasion. Either way, people on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook are repeating these stories as if they are absolute fact. Shit, it went from folks proclaiming that McCoy is an animal for beating Cordon to McCoy being an animal for setting her up. Well, which one is it, son? Which sin did he commit? Do we even know? Like, how are people so convicted when they literally have NO information about what really transpired, man?

Listen, I don’t want my words to be misconstrued here, fam. In the end, McCoy could very well be responsible for all of this, bruh. Ultimately, he could’ve been the person who orchestrated Cordon’s assault, son. By and by, I just want people to be well-versed in the facts before repeating stories as gospel, man. Frankly, folks are quick to believe anything on social media. At the end of the day, McCoy is absolutely a savage if he did this, brethren. All I’m saying is, let’s make sure he did it first before we make all of these accusations. That is all. LC out.

Give Daniel Cormier Some Respect!

Man, why do people hate Daniel Cormier so much? I mean, despite being a seemingly positive dude, he constantly gets shitted on by fans, son. Ok, look, I’m as big a Jon Jones apologist as anyone, but that doesn’t take away from what Cormier has accomplished, fam. Listen, from his Strikeforce days to his run in the UFC, Cormier has damn near done it all, bruh. All in all, after beating Stipe Miocic for the Heavyweight title, it’s time to put some respek on Cormier’s name, folks. Word to Birdman.

Now, before I continue, let’s get the obvious out of the way, son. Ok, yes, Cormier lost to Jones twice. With that being said, I understand why some people have a hard time accepting Cormier as the Light Heavyweight champion. But, if Jones wasn’t such a fucktard, he wouldn’t have lost his title in the first place, man. Shit, after his first fight with Cormier, he lost the belt for hitting a pregnant woman with his car. Next, after his second fight with Cormier, he lost the belt for testing dirty for turinabol. On the real, no one should feel sorry for Jones, fam. Frankly, he squandered his career because of his continuous lack of judgement, bruh.

Anyway, when it comes to Cormier, he’s achieved damn near everything in MMA, son. Hell, before making his mark in the UFC, he was the Strikeforce Heavyweight champ. From there, he went down to Light Heavyweight so he didn’t get in the way of his teammate, Cain Velasquez. Real talk, outside of his questionable losses to Jones, Cormier is undefeated, man. Side note, I now call Jones’s victories “questionable” because he’s pissed hot twice, fam. Keeping it a buck, Jones hasn’t had a good run since USADA took over the drug testing, bruh. All I can say is, it makes me wonder about all of his other wins now. *Sigh* That’s just so damn disappointing, folks.

In the end, we all need to give Cormier his just due, son. Ultimately, we can put an asterisk next to his Light Heavyweight crown, but we can’t do the same with his Heavyweight title, man. By and by, he knocked the FUCK outta Miocic, fam! At the end of the day, Miocic is a legend in his own right, bruh. He holds the record for the most consecutive Heavyweight title defenses and Cormier put him down. All I know is, that’s the mark of a man who deserves his respect, people. That is all. LC out.

I Un-Retired & Then Re-Retired From Basketball

So, does anyone know what it’s like to run in slow motion? Like, no camera tricks or movie trickery? Well, that’s exactly what I was doing yesterday, son. *Sigh* Who the fuck told me that I could still play basketball, man? On the real, my entire body has committed treason and mutiny against me, fam. All I know is, two hours after I un-retired from basketball, I hung my jersey back up in the rafters, bruh. Frankly, my run is over, folks. Keeping it a buck, I just have to accept my washed-dom and move on, brethren.

Ok, let me be honest for a second, son. Now, literally EVERY injury I’ve ever had has come as a result of playing ball. Shit, I broke my left leg, tore my right knee cartilage, badly sprained both ankles AND dislocated by left pinky finger. However, my dumbass just kept on playing, man. Why? Because of an insane love of the game, fam. Hell, to put this in perspective, my love of basketball used to be neck-and-neck with my love of music, bruh. Yeah, it was THAT real, people.

Anyway, after the birth of my second child, I kinda strayed away from the game, son. Not because I lost any love, but because I just didn’t have the time, man. Moving on, in the last few weeks, I decided to get back in the game, fam. So, I laced up my kicks and hit the gym, bruh. Needless to say, my body HATES me today, brethren. Like, every time I take a step, I can hear my knees saying “what the fuck is wrong with you?!” Real talk, by the time I got home, my wife thought I got hit by a truck, folks. That’s how labored I was walking, people.

In the end, I’m legitimately in pain as I write this, son. Ultimately, the glory days are over, man. By and by, my jumper may still be good, but my basketball fitness is traaaaaaash, fam! At the end of the day, I’m going to just stick to boxing and lifting, bruh. All in all, I don’t need these type of shenanigans anymore, folks. So, RIP to my basketball career, brethren. It was great while it lasted. LC out.

What The F*ck, Boogie Cousins?!

Man, what the fuck is going on out here, son? Like, is competition an antiquated concept? I mean, what’s the point of watching the NBA if EVERY superstar just decides to play together? All I know is, free agency has officially jumped the shark, fam. Keeping it a buck, DeMarcus Cousins signing with the Golden State Warriors is one of the most ridiculous deals I’ve ever seen, bruh. All in all, I may need to bow out of watching league games, folks.

Ok, for those who missed it, Cousins just one-upped LeBron James in the “How To Break Social Media” game. Apparently, after not receiving any offers from other teams, because of his fucked up Achilles, Cousins decided to call the Warriors. From there, the two sides worked out a one-year deal that would bring Cousins to The Bay for $5.3 million. So, if we’re keeping count, the Warriors now have FIVE players who have been selected to an All-NBA Team. Shit, at this point, should these other teams even show up to play next season?

Look, here’s my issue with all of this, son. On the real, it seems as if players no longer want to compete against each other. Ok, Cousins did nothing wrong, according to the rules, but shit, what happened to rivalries? What happened to players going at one another, man? Hell, everyone just wants to stack the deck now and gang up on undermanned teams. Honestly, all of this shit is corny, fam. All I can say is, Cousins went from wanting to beat the shit out of Kevin Durant to joining his team. *Sigh* It’s fucking ridiculous, bruh!

Keeping it a buck, I blame LeBron and the Boston Celtics for all of this new age fuckery, son. Listen, this era began when Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen teamed up. Now, as the story goes, that Celtics team gave James headaches, which caused him to join the Miami Heat with Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh. From there, the floodgates were opened, man. Years later, Durant joins the Warriors and now this Boogie shit. Frankly, these free agency deals are nothing more than the culmination of an issue that’s been brewing for almost a decade, fam.

In the end, fuuuuuuuuuck, bruh! *Sigh* How can I even watch basketball next season, son? Ultimately, we KNOW how it’s all going to end, man. By and by, the Warriors were going to win another title without Cousins. So, it’s a foregone conclusion that they’re going to three-peat, fam. At the end of the day, let me get a contract too, Warriors. Look, the cartilage in my right knee is trash, but my jumper is still pure, folks. That is all. LC out.