Damn, Darkness: RIP Charlie Murphy

Damn, son. *Sigh* All I can do is shake my head, man. On the real, Rest In Peace to Charlie Murphy. Cancer has taken yet another victim, bruh. Now, contrary to what some news outlets might say, Charlie was way more than Eddie Murphy‘s older brother. In fact, he was a master storyteller, a quick-witted verbal flame thrower and a dude who was hilariously menacing. All in all, we lost a great talent and his legacy should be celebrated.

Now, maybe I’m dating myself, but my first real memory of Murphy was in the movie CB4. Yeah, I know he was in a few films before that, including a couple of Spike Lee joints, but I vividly remember him as Gusto. Look, I got endless joy out of watching him terrorize Albert (Chris Rock). His aggression was always funny and it made every scene entertaining to watch.

Moving on, as time progressed, he found himself on every visual medium imaginable. However; no one will ever forget his role on Chappelle’s Show. Listen, everything he did with Dave Chappelle on that show was gold, son. EVERYTHING, man! Whether we’re talking about “Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories” or “The Mad Real World” or the “Player Hater’s Ball,” Murphy created nothing but classic material, fam.

Ok, keeping it a buck, Chappelle may be the greatest comedian of all time. With that being said, the most memorable material from his show might actually be Murphy’s stories about Rick James and Prince. Think about that for a second, man. That’s how great Murphy was. Even legends like Chappelle and his brother Eddie knew how phenomenal Charlie was. As Eddie always said, Charlie was “his best impression.”

In the end, Murphy deserves his respect. He put in the time and the effort to be considered an icon. Now, let’s celebrate his memory by slapping a “habitual line-stepper” and then eating a plate of pancakes. RIP Charlie Murphy!

P.S. Prayers up to Murphy’s children. Due to his untimely demise from leukemia, his kids are now technically orphans. Unfortunately, Murphy’s wife, Tisha Taylor, died from cervical cancer in 2009. I swear, cancer might be the worst thing to ever plague humanity, man. That is all.

My Problem With Casey Affleck

So, to be honest, in regards to acting merit, I AM upset that Casey Affleck beat Denzel Washington for Best Actor at the Academy Awards. However; that’s not why I’m writing this post today. In actuality, I’m REALLY upset that Affleck won this award because of his history. Now, whether people want to admit it or not, the Academy just awarded a sexual abuser with their highest honor. Ultimately, all I want to know is, why is Affleck allowed to slide but Nate Parker was destroyed by the allegations against him?

Now, before I continue, let me make a few things clear. I don’t fuck with sexual assault, regardless of the culprit’s race. Despite the fact that Parker was found not guilty of raping a fellow college student, I still believe he did it. Why? Because I heard the recorded conversation between him and the victim. Look, I won’t go any further into this because I already wrote a dissertation on this topic. In any case, when the general public got wind of this story, it completely tanked the promotion of his The Birth of a Nation film. All in all, I can’t really say I’m bothered by this because I have a hard time supporting an alleged rapist.

Moving on, everything I just said feeds into my disdain for Affleck’s win. Look, if anyone does a little digging, they’ll find the accusations that two women made against him during the filming of I’m Still Here. First, Magdalena Gorka claimed that he got into bed with her on set and tried to pressure her into sleeping with him. Now, since he was also the director, when she refused, he made her life hell on set. Next, Amanda White claimed that Affleck instructed another crew member to show her his dick, he called women “cows” and he also told her it was time for her to get pregnant. Basically, Affleck was fucking bugging during the movie shoot.

All I want to know is, why is Affleck allowed to prosper while Parker was taken down? In my eyes, neither men should be allowed to succeed. If we don’t condone violence against women, then perpetrators should have to walk around with a scarlet letter. I hate to bring race into discussions about women’s rights, but it’s no coincidence that a White rapist can reach the pinnacle of his industry, while a Black one falls by the wayside. Only in America can the people find a way to divide the same atrocity along racial lines.

In the end, both men ain’t shit for what they’ve done to women. On the real, Affleck can take his Oscar and shove it. Also, shout-out to the Academy for essentially being sexual abuse-sympathizers. *Sigh* It’s a crazy world we live in, son. LC out.

Joseph Fiennes Killed Michael Jackson Again

So, I want everyone reading this to take a hard look at the picture above. LOOK AT THAT SHIT, MAN! Who approved this fuckery, son?! Why would Hollywood allow this bullshit to happen? I know the film industry has a long, looooooong history of Whitewashing historically Black characters, but this is out of control, man. All I know is, Joseph Fiennes and the entire staff of Elizabeth, Michael & Marlon need to be beaten with rubber hoses for what they did to Michael Jackson.

Now, before I continue eviscerating Fiennes for the bullshit makeup on his face, I want to talk about the plot of this movie. So, apparently, right after the 9/11 attacks, Jackson, Elizabeth Taylor and Marlon Brando hopped in a car and road tripped with each other from New York to California. Needless to say, shenanigans ensued along the way. *Sigh* Like, that’s a real plot, son. I mean, let’s put all of this into perspective. First, a screenplay was written about this. Next, a director signed on to make this. Finally, a cast and crew was put together to complete this. Along the way, ANYONE could’ve been like “ay, yo, this is a stupid ass idea.” However; NO ONE said that, son. I’m fucking baffled, man. Absolutely baffled.

Ok, getting back to Fiennes, I have so many fucking questions, son. First, why was this White dude allowed to play one of our greatest Black icons in the first place? Look, this isn’t a fictional character where it’s up to interpretation. Michael Joseph Jackson was a living, breathing human being and he was BLACK! All the vitiligo and plastic surgery in the world couldn’t change the fact that he was a Negro from Gary, Indiana, bro. Now, if anyone questions that, just go look at the rest of his family, man. Shit, Jermaine Jackson‘s face is probably super greasy as we speak, son.

Moving on, let’s talk about Fiennes’ makeup. Ok, look, in the latter parts of his life, MJ looked like a damn fool, son. I’ll be the first to admit that. With that being said, how in the fuck does Fiennes look even worse than the real MJ? How, Sway? How?! Bruh, I’m sure there are a billion pictures of Michael circulating around the internet right now. This crew couldn’t do a better job of approximating that man’s face?! I… I’m at a fucking loss for words, son. Mixing gall with an utter lack of execution is dangerous as all hell, man. 

In the end, I’m speechless, son. Joseph Fiennes and the cast of Elizabeth, Michael & Marlon murdered MJ for a second time. Shit, they need to be in prison with Conrad Murray. Look, even though Murray was an incompetent doctor, he wasn’t aiming to kill Mike. On the other hand, the clowns who worked on this movie did this bullshit on purpose. *Sigh* I’m out.

Let’s Talk About The Blackity-Black Golden Globes

I’m Black, y’all, and I’m Black, y’all, and I’m Blackity-Black and I’m Black, y’all. Man, if anyone watched the Golden Globes last night, they would’ve probably heard those CB4 lyrics cycling in the background. All jokes aside, last night’s awards show was a great time for Black actors and actresses. After a year of exceptional work in both television and film, multiple Black stars were honored for their respective performances. Accolades were doled out for achievements both in front of and behind the camera. With that being said, let’s keep the party going and talk about all of our winners, son. Ohledoit!

Now, if we’re starting with television, we’ve got to give major props to both Donald Glover and Tracee Ellis Ross. First off, let’s talk about the fact that Ross is the first Black woman to win the award for Best Actress – Musical or Comedy since Debbie Allen. To put this into perspective, Allen won that award back in 1983 for Fame. To give even MORE perspective, Allen won that award before I was born and I’m in my early 30’s. Needless to say, it’s been a long fucking time, son. Ross has been killing it on black-ish for a while now. This honor is long overdue, man. Massive congrats to her.

Next, let’s talk about Donald Glover, aka Childish Gambino. This dude had an incredible night, man. Shiiiit, if we’re counting his “Awaken, My Love!” album and his soon-to-be stint as Star WarsLando Calrissian, Glover had an incredible 2016, son. In any case, not only did he win the award for Best Actor – Musical or Comedy, but his show, Atlanta, also won Best Series – Musical or Comedy.

Keeping it a buck, Atlanta and Issa Rae’s Insecure were my two favorite shows of the past year. Both Glover and Rae made shows that were unapologetically Black and dared the mainstream to get onboard. Keep in mind, when I say “unapologetically Black,” I’m not referring to any stereotypical depictions of Black people. Both shows displayed the nuances of our community and depicted the fact that we’re not all a monolith. So, with a show like Atlanta being respected, it shows us all that we don’t have to dilute ourselves for recognition.

Moving on, let’s get to these movies, son. All I know is, all praises are due to Viola Davis and Moonlight. Davis won the award for Best Supporting Actress – Drama, Musical or Comedy for her role in Fences and Moonlight won Best Motion Picture – Drama. Now, even though I believe Davis should’ve been in the Best Actress category, it’s about time Hollywood recognized she’s one of the best in the game. She’s been a deity for quite some time now, man. They’re officially late to the party, son.

Also, to keep it going, Moonlight was the best movie I watched last year. If we’re being real, homosexuality can be a taboo subject in the Black community. However; this film does any amazing job of chronicling a man’s journey through self-realization and self-acceptance. There was nothing cliché about the storyline and it’s impossible to not be emotionally invested in the characters. Side note, I love absolutely EVERYTHING about Janelle Monáe. I’d find a way to marry her if my wife wouldn’t kill me first.

In the end, while we don’t need Hollywood’s acceptance to do great work, it’s still good to see them acknowledge our awesomeness. With or without their help, we need to continue pushing OUR art forward and telling OUR stories. That’s the only real way to shape our own narrative. Once again, congrats to all of last night’s winners, man. Good day.

P.S. I hate to end this post on a critical note, but someone tell the Golden Globes that Hidden Figures and Fences are two different movies. No, White people, we don’t all look alike and we don’t all act in the same movies. That is all.

P.P.S. Shout-out to Glover again for showing love to Migos‘ “Bad and Boujee“. That song is without a doubt the most enjoyable thing on the planet right now. Rain drop… LC out.

2016 Killed EVERYONE!

Man, I had no plans to write anything this week. Since I’m on vacation until the New Year, I thought I could sit back and chill. But yo! What the fuck is wrong with 2016, son?! This year has killed damn near every celebrity I grew up with, man. Seriously, the last 365 days have been completely out of control. At this point, after hearing about the recent deaths of George Michael and Carrie Fisher, I’m more than ready for the year itself to be buried. With that being said, get the fuck outta here, 2016!

On the real, I’m not even sure what to write here. The year started off poorly when David Bowie passed. That caught me completely off guard. However; Prince‘s death took the wind out of my sails. Anyone who knows me knows he’s my favorite musician of all-time and the MAIN reason why I learned to play instruments. In all honesty, I’m still not over his death, man. I still have so many questions and comments about the circumstances that led to his untimely demise. But, we don’t have enough time for all of my conspiracy theories, son.

Now, whether we’re talking about Muhammad Ali, Phife Dawg, John Saunders, Craig Sager, Sharon Jones, Maurice White, Gene Wilder or Alan Thicke, we’ve lost countless celebrities who’ve impacted us on various levels. The wildest part of all of this is the fact that I haven’t even named everyone, son. Frankly, I don’t have enough time, patience or mental capacity to list everyone who fell this year. With that being said, I’ll let the New York Daily News do their job and give the proper shine to all of our fallen comrades.

Ultimately, this may be the last post I write for the year, man. 2016 has been a fucking beast! I didn’t even mention the fact that democracy also died this year with Donald Trump‘s election. For anyone who thinks I’m being over dramatic, just look at the voting numbers. Hillary Clinton got 2.9 million more votes than Trump and still lost, son. *Sigh* I’m going back to sleep, man. Good day.

Nate Parker vs. Nat Turner

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Look, I won’t lie to anyone out there. Writing this post hurts my soul for a variety of reasons. I’m struggling to find a way to convey my feelings about the entire situation without being problematic. Maybe that’s not a good way to start an article, but everyone who reads this blog knows I’m brutally honest in regards to my point of view. With that being said, I feel like there are two different conversations at play in this Nate Parker scenario: rape culture and Black equality. While I won’t be one to act like I have all of the answers, I would be remiss if I didn’t speak about this ordeal.

Now, before I get started, let’s just briefly talk about Parker. The 36-year-old actor and director is currently ascending to the apex of his film career. After performances in films such as Beyond the LightsRed Tails and The Great Debaters, Parker has reached the height of his critical acclaim with his newest film, The Birth of a Nation. After writing, directing and starring in the movie, his work gained the attention of Hollywood‘s power players after it received rave reviews and the largest deal in Sundance Film Festivahistory. However; while riding high from his newfound success, a very dark chapter of his history recently resurfaced.

Back in 1999, while attending Penn State University, Parker and his roommate, Jean Celestin, were charged with raping an 18-year-old classmate. Apparently, after a night of drinking, Parker brought the woman back to his apartment, and despite her physical state, engaged in sex with her. To make matters worse, Celestin, who was also in the apartment, decided to join in on the sexual assault. During the subsequent trial, several witnesses testified to the woman being visibly drunk, despite Parker and Celestin suggesting otherwise. In addition, in recorded phone calls that were used at trial, Parker can be heard telling the woman that she “put [herself] in that situation.” However; all of these factors weren’t enough to convict Parker. Based on the fact he and the woman had a consensual sexual encounter the night before, he avoided going down for his crime. Now, while Celestin was originally convicted for his involvement in this situation, he appealed his sentence and skated because the prosecution was unable to once again secure witness testimony.

The saddest part of this whole episode is the fact this woman was harassed by not only Parker and Celestin, but the Penn State campus as a whole. Since both men were star wrestlers at the school, they had plenty of people caping for them and coming to their defense. In classic “victim blaming” fashion, they questioned her character and the validity of her claims, all while championing the men who abused her. Ultimately, this caused her to attempt suicide twice before actually succeeding on her third try in 2012. While Parker recently tried to get ahead of the story and express his “regret” in a lengthy Facebook post, this doesn’t change the course of events or make them even remotely alright.

For me, the reaction from some Black people about this case is truly troubling. If anyone scours through social media, they’ll find various conspiracy theories of the “powers that be” trying to take down a successful Black man. These theories point to the fact the rape case against Parker only surfaced as he was gearing up to put out his aforementioned film about Nat Turner. Side note, for anyone who’s unaware, Turner was a historical figure who led a slave rebellion in 1831, which resulted in the deaths of about sixty five White people. Ultimately, Turner was captured and murdered for his insurgence.

In the eyes of Parker’s supporters, it comes as no surprise that the character of a Black director who decided to speak about a Black hero has come under attack. In the age of #OscarsSoWhite, Black people have frequently expressed the desire to be treated equally in Hollywood. Whether it comes down to securing better acting roles or more opportunities to direct big-budget films, Black people want to be looked at in the same light as their White counterparts. While this is also important to me, it does NOT excuse what Parker did, man. He violated a woman, belittled her plight in the aftermath, and even now, he speaks about how all of this has affected HIM. He’s not the victim here! In actuality, the real victim is dead because she couldn’t cope with how the justice system failed her. I’ve seen Bill Cosby‘s supporters use the same type of “conspiracy” defense, but why won’t we hold our own accountable for the fucked up shit they do? Overall racial inequality doesn’t give us the excuse to take advantage of other people. When it comes to both Parker and Cosby, they victimized people who couldn’t defend themselves. Individuals like that do NOT deserve our sympathy or support, regardless of what ideal we believe they represent.

In the end, I’m completely conflicted about seeing this movie. On one hand, I want Black people to excel in every facet, especially the historically segregated film industry. However; I find it very hard to give money to someone who has committed such an atrocity. Look, I’ve never been a hypocrite, son. I’ve cut off Cosby and R. Kelly for these same reasons. Ultimately, I guess I just wish a better human being were receiving Parker’s accolades. Good day.

Guess Who’s Back…


First off, I want to thank everyone who reached out to me and convinced me to start blogging again. From Facebook to Instagram to the random compatriots in my phone, I’ve received a large number of kind words and swift kicks to the ass to get the proceedings proceeding again. Knowing there’s still an audience interested in what I have to stay has definitely energized me. I know I have been an absentee wordsmith, but I promise to try to stay the course this time. I have a boatload of new ramblings to ramble and I can’t wait to jump back into the fuckery.

With that being said, stay tuned, folks. I plan on starting my comeback tour this upcoming Monday, July 18th. Also, be warned, this upcoming week is about to be a whole HEAP of Blackity-Black, super Black shit. Get yourselves ready. The Internet Thuggery is back. Good day.