So, this is what it’s come to, son. Pandemonium has ensued and cities are in chaos, man. Now, what could be the cause of the mayhem, fam? Is it martial law? Is it Godzilla? Is it a supernatural fight between those teenagers from Chronicle? Nah, it’s just a bunch of muhfuckas losing their minds over Popeyes‘ new chicken sandwich. All I know is, even if the sandwich is delicious, folks are out here wilin’ over poultry, bruh.
Ok, before I continue, let me keep in a buck, son. Now, I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I’m too good for a chicken sandwich. I mean, I definitely want to see what all of the hype is about, man. However, I’m not about to lower my pride and put my body at risk for breaded chicken, fam. Like, I keep reading story after story after story of insanely long lines, people getting into fights and a general lack of inventory. Shit, these sandwiches are so scarce that Quavo from Migos is selling them shits for $1,000 each. All I can say is, we have officially jumped the fucking shark, bruh.
Look, I don’t have much to say here, son. The point is, everyone needs to fucking relax, man. Frankly, unless Popeyes decides to stop making these sandwiches, we’ll all get one eventually, fam. The way I see it, anyone getting into a fistfight over chicken needs to reevaluate their life, bruh. Listen, I have no idea if the sandwich is better than Chick-fil-A‘s, brethren. But, I’m sure we’ll all be able to find out for ourselves. In the meantime, people need to fucking chill. Side note, I never thought Chick-fil-A was that amazing, but that’s another story for another day.
In the end, that’s all I’ve got, son. Ultimately, chicken sandwiches shouldn’t be a source of neighborhood strife, man. By and by, I’m sure I’m contributing to the tomfoolery by writing this post, fam. The word is, we’ve already given Popeyes about $24 million worth of free advertising. Once again, we as consumers don’t understand the power we have. So, at the end of the day, Popeyes is winning regardless, bruh. Good for them, I guess. That is all. LC out.