The Roast Of Anthony Scaramucci

10 days. 240 hours. 14,400 minutes. 864,000 seconds. That’s how long Anthony Scaramucci lasted as Donald Trump‘s communications director, son. After threatening to fire everyone in Trump’s administration, Scaramucci couldn’t even save his own job, man. Side note, I want the media to stop trying to call him “The Mooch.” Look, assholes like this guy don’t deserve a nickname, fam. In any case, I’d like to take this time to give Scaramucci a proper send-off. I mean, don’t all clowns love a good show?

So, where should I begin, bruh? Ok, let’s talk about the fact that as soon as he entered the White House, Scaramucci immediately sealed his own fate. Whether it was Sean Spicer‘s resignation or Scaramucci’s tirade against Reince Priebus and Steve Bannon, the now-jobless communications director made enemies with everyone. Fam, what part of the game is publicly cursing out co-workers? I swear, this dude didn’t understand the basic fundamentals of working with a team. Real talk, didn’t we start to learn those principles in kindergarten? Clearly, Scaramucci missed these lessons, son.

Moving on, who knows how John Kelly will fare as Trump’s Chief of Staff. All I know is, firing Scaramucci was a good first move. Even though I can’t stand Trump, the shitshow that is his administration needs to chill, man. Like, can he even surround himself with people who can pretend like they know what they’re doing? Shit, Scaramucci was clearly a basket case and had no business in the West Wing. On the real, Kelly should take this stance with everyone on Trump’s squad. So far, all of these jesters have proven themselves to be incompetent, man.

In the end, Anthony Scaramucci, we hardly knew ye. However; good riddance, fool. Maybe now he’ll stop missing the birth of his children. Maybe now he’ll figure out why a nine month pregnant woman would file for divorce. Man, with his personal life in such shambles, where did he find the time to ruin Trump’s inner circle? Well, I guess Scaramucci was good at one thing: destruction. Anyway, no one will miss him, bruh. LC out.

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