Posts Tagged ‘Basketball’

Russell Westbrook

Disclaimer: Although I’m about to give Russell Westbrook props in this post, his fashion sense is still preposterous.

Once again, I’m grown enough to admit I was wrong. I used to give Russell Westbrook grief, son. Watching this dude take on 3 defenders in traffic with Kevin Durant open on the wing can be infuriating, man. Countless times I’ve found myself yelling at the TV, “pass the ball, dammit! Pass the fucking ball!” In my eyes, when you have KD, the most gifted scorer in the league, on your team, there’s no need to continuously go HAM during games. However, while watching the Oklahoma City Thunder play the Memphis Grizzlies, I’ve learned a valuable lesson: OKC can’t score. With that being said, my apologies, Westbrook.

After Westbrook was injured by Patrick Beverly in OKC’s first round match-up against the Houston Rockets, the Thunder have struggled to generate baskets. Last night’s overtime loss to the Grizzlies is the perfect microcosm of their issues. With no additional help, Durant took 27 shots and still ended the game with only 27 points. Serge Ibaka shot 6-13 from the field, and sadly, that’s a noticeable improvement over his last few games. Ibaka hasn’t just been missing shots, he’s been missing them horribly. Just the other game, homie shot a straightaway mid-range jump shot and somehow hit it off the backboard to the right. That’s just pitiful, bruh. Fact of the matter is, hardly anybody on OKC can create their own shot and it’s a glaring defect right now. Reggie Jackson is trying his hardest to pick up the slack, but at the end of the day, he’s still Reggie Jackson.

So to reiterate, I’d like to apologize to Russell Westbrook. I’ve shitted on him on numerous occasions, but I’m finally understanding the method to his madness. Do I still believe he takes too many shots? Absolutely, but shit man, judging from the pieces around him, he has no choice. The defending Western Conference champs are now only one loss away from their season ending in the second round. Honestly speaking, if I were an Oklahoma resident, I would pay a visit to Patrick Beverly. He thoroughly fucked their entire season and should be dealt with accordingly. Now am I advocating violence? Definitely. Good day.

P.S. Because of this post, I will no longer call him “Westbrick.” Well, for now. Who knows what the future holds, son?

Disclaimer: Ok, judging from that embedded image, maybe I can still hate a little bit.

While I’ve spent a good amount of time on this site throwing darts in LeBron James‘ direction, today is the day I cease and desist. Fact of the matter is, he’s too great of a player for me to continue hating. As much as I prefer being “that guy,” I have no legitimate arguments to help my case. With that being said, I shall give credit where credit is due.

Anyone who’s visited this blog before has probably read a couple of posts going for the jugular. Truthfully, I didn’t go after homie due to an inability to play. I went after him because he had all of the talent in the world and played like a bitch during crucial moments. Side bar, if you feel the need to debate me, go revisit the 2010 Eastern Conference Finals against the Boston Celtics and the 2011 Finals against the Dallas Mavericks. He quit on his team in the 1st scenario and completely shat a brick during the 2nd one. When you’re as talented as LBJ, anything less than total domination is absolutely unacceptable. Yes, his numbers were always good on paper, but when shit got real, he was nowhere to be found.

Anyway, he thoroughly disrespected me and every other “hater” with his 2012 season. Last year’s playoffs saw him playing at a level I haven’t seen since Michael Jordan. His Finals performance was one of the scariest things I’ve ever witnessed, son. It’s like he woke up one day, finally realized he was by far the most gifted player in the league and proceeded to shit on everyone. Including this season, his number are still getting better, bruh. How the fuck are they still getting better?! After the regular season this year, he had career highs in FG%, 3P% and rebounds. These days, it’s not often I’m legitimately amazed by a player. I find myself consistently saying “oh shit” when watching him and Steph Curry play. Side bar, Curry isn’t human. He. Is. Not. Human! In any case, I’ve decided to do the grown-up thing and give that man his props.

All in all, despite all of the great things I’ve just said about LeBron James, I’m still a New York Knicks fan. Which means in order for us to have a chance against the Miami Heat, we need to become the 1989 Detroit Pistons. It’s the “Jordan Rules” all over again, bitch! Bring it!

The year was 2004 and I was a bright-eyed sophomore in college. See, in the world I lived in, the sky was blue and teams who were up 3-0 in a best-of-7 series always won. However, the New York Yankees had to fuck it all up and shatter my world. After having a commanding lead over the Boston Red Sox in the ALCS, these fuckers lost 4 straight games. Seeing as how I went to school in Boston, this might have been the worst possible thing to ever happen to me. Needless to say, after watching my New York Knicks lose their 2nd straight game to the Boston Celtics, my nightmares are slowly resurfacing.

For a team with minimal playoff experience, the last thing the Knicks should want to do is play a Game 6 on the road against a former world champion. Fact of the matter is, despite their accelerated age, the Celtics are no strangers to this type of pressure. Just 2 years ago, these dudes pushed the Miami Heat to 7 games, when everyone simply assumed LeBron James and company would steamroll them. From the beginning of the series, I told people, “never count these dudes out.” Now did I get comfortable with a 3-0 lead? Absolutely, but then Carmelo Anthony decided it was a perfect time to shit the bed. His shooting percentage these last 2 games have been atrocious, man. Here’s a message for coach Mike Woodson: go with the hot hand! As much as I enjoy hating on Raymond Felton, he’s been holding it down while the rest of the team collapses. In addition, if JR Smith wants to keep shooting like he did the last game, he might as well return to suspension, son. While I still believe the Knicks will close these dudes out, they’ve just made their lives a hell of a lot harder.

All in all, I’m probably overreacting, but when you’ve seen a team you love blow a 3-0 series lead, you tend to panic. Also, my psyche wouldn’t be able to take another New York team epically failing to a Boston team. Side bar, is “epically” even a word? It sounds wrong, but fuck it, I’ll use it anyway. In any case, if shit goes sour, I might have to start assaulting all of my New England associates. Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that, son. Good day.

P.S. I know this is completely off topic, but RIP to Chris “Mac Daddy” Kelly from Kris Kross. Fuck just bumping “Jump,” I was all about their entire Totally Krossed Out album. Did I ever wear my clothes backwards? Absolutely. Well, that was until my mother slapped the shit out of me. Regardless, his legacy is solidified.

Is that how some people really feel about Jason Collins‘ announcement? If so, these fools need to find better ways to occupy their time. For those unaware, Collins recently became the first active player in one of America‘s 4 major sports to reveal his homosexuality. He wrote about it in an upcoming issue of Sports Illustrated, and truthfully, his letter was inspiring to read. I couldn’t imagine denying who I really was for the majority of my life, so I’m happy this dude is finally living his truth. Honestly, I’ve written enough about my support of the LGBT community on this site, so there’s no need to regurgitate it right now. As long as that man is enjoying his life, who are we to judge? That’s right, Chris Broussard, that goes for you too. “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” Unless you live a blemish free life, shut the fuck up, son. Shouldn’t you be busy getting wrong information from your “sources” anyway? It’s amazing how Christians can be the most judgmental people, when “judge not lest ye be judged” is one of their religion’s foremost principles. People these days, I tell ya.

In any case, I’m going to cut this post short today. I wholeheartedly suggest everyone reads Collins’ article in SI. Once you’re done with that, applaud that man. Deuces.

Damn, Kobe

Posted: April 15, 2013 in Articles
Tags: , , ,

I am no stranger to hating on Kobe Bryant. Whether it’s his fradulent clutch history or the preposterous comparisons to Michael Jordan, I thrive on tearing down his mystic. With that being said, I still felt bad when I saw that man go down on Friday night. I would never wish injury on anyone, and truthfully, the NBA is a lot less interesting without him. While he’s had damn near every injury under the sun, this time it’s different. Could this be the end of an era?

In case you missed it, while the Los Angeles Lakers were playing the Golden State Warriors, Kobe completely tore his Achilles tendon. It didn’t take an arrow from bitch-ass Paris, but the damage was done nonetheless. Side bar, I shouldn’t have to explain what that last sentence was in reference to. In any case, this injury came at the worst possible time for the Lakers, because with only 1 game left, they’re trying to clinch that last playoff spot in the Western Conference. On top of that, if they do solidify that spot, they’ll have to face either the Oklahoma City Thunder or the San Antonio Spurs in the first round without their star player. That’s a tall task for any team, son. There’s only so long they can run on adrenaline before reality hits.

Honestly speaking, at 34-years-old, I don’t know how Kobe is going to come back from this. While it’s absolutely feasible, I believe there’s far too much mileage on his body. This was the man’s 17th season. HIS 17TH SEASON! When you include the playoffs, he’s played close to 1,500 games in his career. Add to that all of the injuries he’s sustained during his tenure and you have a man who’s really closer to 50-years-old. How exactly is he supposed to come back and play like himself? I mean, even he had doubts about it when he ranted on Facebook. While you can never count him out, this could really be the end of a legendary career. If that’s the case, we as fans might have lost a lot of the theatrics that make each season fun. Who am I supposed to hate on now?

In the end, if this is really the end of his career, he’ll easily go down as one of the greatest players ever. His accolades are self-explanatory, bruh. As much as I like to hate on him, I can’t take away his achievements. On the other hand, if he is able to come back, I hope he isn’t just a shell of himself. It’s always difficult to watch players diminish their legacy by playing too long. All in all, all I can say is damn, Kobe.

When it comes to the New York Knicks, I’ve shed tears. That’s right, Lawrence Charles has released water from his eyes due to the Knickerbockers. To be clear, those tears were always in relation to something negative. I have a laundry list of memories that still haunt my dreams. However, something strange happened the other night: the Knicks won the Atlantic Division. Yes, you read that right. Not the Boston Celtics, not the New Jersey, excuse me, Brooklyn Nets, but the New York motherfucking Knicks. I damn near cried tears of joy, son. This is a feeling I haven’t felt since childhood, bruh. Now, after the season the team has had, I’ve added a new chapter to my love/hate/love/hate/love relationship with them.

To be honest, I was pissed at the organization in the beginning of the season. After signing Jason Kidd, Kurt Thomas, Marcus Camby and Rasheed Wallace, I was convinced management was looking to battle Bill Russell for the 1965 NBA Championship. I couldn’t see how we’d compete using the squad from the Old Folks Home. In addition, I’ve been incredibly critical of Carmelo Anthony in the past, due to the fact he disrupted team chemistry when he was first traded. All in all, I was wrong. That’s right, I said it. I’m a grown ass man who can admit when he’s wrong. Honestly, I have no idea how Mike Woodson was able to turn this team around. We’ve been mediocre for so long, I thought only a hybrid of Phil Jackson and Jesus could pull us up from the abyss. In actuality, all we needed was a bald-headed Black man with the greatest goatee in human history. All I can say is, I applaud that man for his efforts.

In the end, I can’t front like I still don’t have some reservations. After living through this and this and this, it should be understandable that people like me can’t take another heartbreak. I still vividly remember the roundhouse kicks I sustained from my cousin after Patrick Ewing missed that finger roll. My psyche is damaged, son. With all of that being said, I will be rooting for my boys as we embark on this playoff journey. One win will no longer suffice. We’re coming for that title, bitch. You’ve been warned, Miami Heat.

Kevin Ware

Truthfully, this should be a really short post. I just need to get something off of my chest. NCAA players have been taken advantage of for far too long and it needs to end, now. Universities have been able to boost their enrollment and pay coaches an obscene amount of money, but student-athletes are always left out in the cold. This became abundantly clear, once again, when Kevin Ware shattered his right leg during Louisville‘s game against Duke this past Sunday. A college player could ruin his entire career during one freak accident and have nothing to fall back on. It’s completely bullshit and the “hamster wheel” treatment has to stop.

Now before I continue, let me say I’ve heard all of the arguments against paying college players. I’ve heard the “they’re students, so if you pay them, you have to pay everyone” logic. Let me counter that by saying that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. I can guarantee the kid dissecting a frog during a Biology lab isn’t bringing in millions of dollars to the school. I can guarantee the African Studies professor isn’t pulling in $5 million in salary per school year. Countless schools are visibly more successful due to the caliber of their sports programs. College players consistently put themselves on the line and get nothing in return. To top it off, if they even take a slice of pizza from someone, they could have their scholarships revoked. That’s some slave shit, son. Watching Ware suffer on the ground reminded me of the fact that if his playing days were done, Louisville wouldn’t do shit for him. They’ll just continue on as a program and where does that leave him, exactly? Just a gruesome segment during a sports highlight show.

To me, it goes without saying, NCAA players need to be paid. They risk far too much and make their respective schools far too wealthy to consistently get the short end of the stick. Let’s work on that. Deal? Deal.

P.S. I realize this post isn’t as short as I originally said it would be. I mean, shit gets real when I start ranting, son. You know you love it, bitches.

Keeping it all the way real, I can’t properly formulate my thoughts when it comes to this Jeremy Lin debacle. With that being said, I’m going to do things differently for this post. I’m just going to list my objections to this move in bullet format. The New York Knicks have reduced me to this. And here… we… go!

1. It’s unbelievable the Knicks pick now to be frugal. Where was this reasoning when they overpaid Stephon Marbury, Jerome James, Eddy Curry, Larry Brown and Allan Houston? Lin’s contract is nothing compared to these bullshit moves. Now these fools want to worry about the tax? I’m having a conniption fit right now.

2. Raymond Felton is fat.

3. After signing Jason Kidd, Kurt Thomas and Marcus Camby, the Knicks now have 3 of the 6 oldest players in the league. How the fuck is that building for the future? Who’s Kidd going to mentor now? Felton? I’m sure they’ll have a lot to talk about over a burger and some Jäger shots.

4. Raymond Felton is fat.

5. During next season, Kidd, Felton and Steve Novak will be making about $4.5 million more than Lin will. So an old dude, a fat dude and a stationary shooter will be making more than a promising point guard. Awesome. And this is coming from a Novak fan. I’m just a realist.

6. Raymond Felton is fat.

In the end, I can understand the argument that Lin is being overpaid. However, I’m just not happy with the pieces we acquired in return. All I know is, I’m picking a new team to root for next season. After 26 years, I’ve officially had enough. Anyone have any suggestions? By the way, the Brooklyn Nets are not an option. All these switch siders make my stomach turn. I don’t give a fuck where they play, they will always be the New Jersey Nets. They can keep that shit over there son. Good day.

Disclaimer: I have the theme song to Welcome Back, Kotter on repeat while I write this post.

So, much has been made about Kobe Bryant‘s comments about the Dream Team. According to the “Black Garden Snake,” excuse me, “Black Mamba,” this year’s Olympic team could beat the legendary 1992 squad. Never one to back down from a challenge, Michael Jordan scoffed at idea and stated there was “no comparison” between the 2 teams. However, while the Dream Team will always hold a special place in my heart, the prospect of them getting beat isn’t that far-fetched, and I’ll tell you why.

To get this started, let’s start from the ground up. First, take a look at the obligatory college players on the team. While Christian Laettner was a celebrated athlete at Duke, Anthony Davis would wash and wax the floor with him. Considering Davis’ shot-blocking prowess, I’d be shocked if Laettner actually got a shot off. Next, if you start comparing big men, while I’ll give the edge to the Dream Team, there will definitely be some mismatches. For example, you can’t tell me Charles Barkley won’t have a hard time guarding Kevin Love at the power forward position. How’s the “Round Mound of Rebound” going to live up to his name when he’s busy trying to contest Love’s 3-point shots?

At the guard position is where things start to get hairy. The 2012 team is stacked with point guards and shooting guards, to the point where John Stockton, Clyde Drexler and Chris Mullin won’t know what hit them. Chris Paul, Deron Williams, Russell Westbrook and James Harden will run laps around these dudes. I can already envision Paul putting Stockton on skates and it isn’t a pretty sight. Jordan over Kobe is really the only instance at guard where the Dream Team has the clear advantage.

Finally, let’s address the one area Jordan conveniently left out: Magic Johnson and Larry Bird. Based on their size and the positions they play, they would most likely have to guard LeBron James and Kevin Durant, respectively. With that being said, you know and I know there’s no way either of them could keep up. By 1992, both legends were past their primes while James and Durant are just getting warmed up. I mean, let’s keep it all the way real for a second son. Even in the prime of their careers, they couldn’t stay in front of LBJ and KD. I know people on the interwebz won’t want to admit this, but you know it’s true. When it comes to LeBron, they could try putting Scottie Pippen on him, but he’s too strong for Pippen too. To me, that’s the deal breaker. LeBron and Durant are the 2 best players on this Olympic team and the Dream Team would have no hope of guarding them.

Now I’m sure there will be people who disagree with me, but who cares. Everything I just said makes logical sense. I didn’t even get into the fact this year’s Olympic team has the obvious athletic advantage. By no means am I trying to discredit the Dream Team, but c’mon son, we’re talking 20 years later and players get better. So in the end Jordan, you can absolutely make this comparison. All that’s needed now is someone who can perfect time travel in order to make this game happen. Where’s Stewie Griffin when you need him?

As you can tell from the title, today’s post is a 2-for-1. I couldn’t let either story pass by, so why not talk about them both, right? Now in case you missed it, since my last post, the Miami Heat won the NBA championship and former Penn State assitant coach Jerry Sandusky was found guilty of child molestation. It was a huge 4 days in sports, so let’s just get down with the getdown.

First, I’d like to congratulate the Heat. Anybody who reads this site knows I frequently give them grief. I thoroughly enjoy basking in the failure of LeBron James, but at this time, I have to give credit where credit is due. While I’ve never been in doubt of LeBron’s absurd talent as a basketball player, I always felt he came up short in tough situations. If anybody wants to disagree with me, just look at his Finals performance last year against the Dallas Mavericks and shut up. However, I can’t hold him in the same light anymore. He completely dominated the Oklahoma City Thunder and definitely deserved the Finals MVP award. I previously said if he won a title, I would stop hating. With that being said, I’m a man of my word.

Second, Jerry Sandusky is a despicable human being. I don’t think any of us knew just how disgusting he was before the trial started. As time went on and new evidence was presented, I knew we were truly looking at a monster. I mean c’mon son, even his stepson was subjected to this treatment? His stepson?!? This man had no fucking boundaries or scruples son. Now, after being found guilty of 45 of the 48 counts, I hope the judge gives him all 442 of the years he could possibly spend in prison. Sandusky should never be allowed to breathe a free breath for the rest of his natural life.

That about sums it up. Here you have 2 opposite ends of the spectrum: a team winning a ring and a subhuman taking a fall. I don’t know what I’m going to do until basketball starts again, but I do know I can sleep better now that Sandusky is behind bars. Now, let me get some work done… sike.